Is it normal to be jealous my friend is having a baby?
She's married, and she and her husband have been together since sophmore year of high school (so like...2005). She just went into labor with their first child.
We're all 22.
I've been in a committed relationship with the same guy since 2008, and the only reason we aren't married is because my mother would stop helping me pay for my college if I got married (don't ask why, I think it's a ridiculous rule, but she's made it clear that was the rule since I was a little girl)....I'm in love with him, and I know I will spend the rest of my life with him. That's not even a question.
I want to be happy for my friend, but I find myself SO JEALOUS of the fact that she was able to marry her husband and she gets to have a child. I want so badly to have a child. I worked in a day school (infant through pre-K)for almost 3 years, until my doctor told me I had to quit because I had 2 herniated disks in my spine and lifting the bigger kids was making it worse....and I used to think of all of those little ones as my kids in a way. It was an amazing thing watching them grow and helping them learn, but I know it would be even more amazing to watch my OWN child grow up. Plus, I think my boyfriend and I would make one cute baby. HAHA.
Is it normal to be jealous about stuff like this? She's got the life I've always wanted....and for me, it feels like it's so far away.
I don't even finish college for at least two, possibly three more years. By then, I'm nervous that I'll have fertility issues because of my PCOS and Endometriosis...and if I wasn't able to have a child, it would be devastating.
Don't get me wrong, I am so happy for her and her husband, and I can't wait to meet their new daughter...it's just hard watching her get to experience the things I want so badly, especially when I know it will be such a long time before I'm able to experience it.
Sorry for rambling. I just needed to get that off my chest.