Literally, it was an accident.
Tuesday morning I was in a car accident. By the grace of god, no one else was involved. I was driving to work and I was in the left lane, trying to pass a school bus. When I was trying to switch back into the right lane, I looked over my shoulder to check my blind spot. When I looked forward again, the truck in front of me stopped short. My reflex was to jerk the wheel to avoid rear ending them. I began fishtailing in the right lane, hit the concrete barrier (I was on a overpass part of the highway) than slingshot across both lanes where I hit the concrete median head on at 55mph. Which shot me back into a fast spin and made me hit the barrier again on the back end of my car.
The seatbelt saved my life. If I wasnt wearing it, I would've shot through the windshield and off the overpass. The seat belt gave me nasty burns and bruises and shredded my blouse (a small price to pay). The airbag deployment burned both of my hands and my left arm. And my left knee slammed up into the dash. Overall, I am fine. Just severe whiplash. Physical therapy will probably be necessary to rehabilitate the muscles.
Needless to say, my car is totaled. Right after I dumped $300 dollars into just 2 days prior to the accident. I am so stressed. I am terrified of slipping back into a depression. The doctors wouldnt clear me to go back to work right away, and I havent been at my job long enough to cash in on sick days or vacation days yet. So, I am out of a car, out of nearly a week's salary, I have bills piling up, a new car to buy (which I have ZERO money for).
Money is my biggest depression trigger. And my body is such a mess right now I can't even sit up for extended periods of time, let alone work out. It will be WEEKS before I will be able to be physically active in any productive manner. But I still have to eat. I am so frustrated. Dont get me wrong, I am so grateful. Things could have been so much MUCH worse. I am very, so incredibly lucky. But the reality of the situation is not overshadowed by my gratitude. I can't put myself in denial of my circumstance because I'm trying to so hard to "look on the bright side" as is EVERYONE's advice.
Gah! Sorry for the long rant. I just needed to get it out.