so how long did it take before you felt better about your appearance? I know that even though ive lost quite a bit i still feel really fat

Everyone is different, I think, Shelley. I started to feel pretty good after about 20 pounds because I could see the difference and knew what I was doing was working. Other people started noticing at about 30 pounds, so that was when I realized my appearance was changing for the better, and that was a boost, too.

You're half way to your goal. That's a huge accomplishment. Be proud of yourself and try to put things into perspective. You certainly look better AND ARE HEALTHIER than you were before. That's what matters. One day, one choice at a time, you are making changes for the better.

Lin

That is true. health wise i do feel a lot better. But even though i know ive lost a lot of weight i dont necessarily see/feel it. i still feel the same when i look at myself in the mirror even though my friends all tell me i look great now =/ hopefully the closer i am to goal i'll start to feel better about myself but idk its frustrating at times.

Until I started feeling better? Probably about 20 lbs down from my high weight. But even then, I didn't feel comfortable in my skin.

Well, I've gained about 25 lbs since December (ugh), but I'm down about 7 lbs and still going now.

But, I did get about 10 lbs into my normal weight category before I relapsed, and I can honestly say that was the FIRST time in years that I've ever felt comfortable in my body. I actually liked shopping and trying things on, and I felt comfortable in a BATHING SUIT. Me feeling good in a swim suit? Never before! Craziness! Insanity! But true.

Now I feel bloaty and too big again. But I'm working on it. I can't fail if I don't give up, right?

It keeps on getting better as you lose weight, trust me. And even if you hit a weight that's better for you, you may not notice for a while because your mind has to catch up.

You're doing so great! You're over halfway to your goal!

that could be whats wrong. my dad says im still looking at myself through my "fat eyes". but it def has me frustrated. im lucky that im at least somewhat proportionate but my tummy is killing me cuz i honestly feel as though it hasnt gone down at all. its like everything else has but not that and it makes me feel just uber fat =/ between that and the fact that im kind of on the petite side it makes me think its gonna take a lot more before i get passed the 'fat' stage =[

My starting weight this time was 217, and I only started feeling really comfortable in my skin around 180 (which is also when I hit a size ten and a medium in tops, in case that helps). It's different for everyone, I guess. Up until that point I literally could not see any difference in the mirror, but right around then something clicked and I've been feeling great ever since! Hang in there, you WILL hit that point eventually, I promise!

i can't wait to fit into a 10 =3 or just be out of the double digits for that matter. i recently bought new jeans at work that were on clearance for $10and less because all of mine's were too big. i managed to squeeze into 12 but im really working for the 10 =/ though i will say shopping for new smaller clothes did make me feel a bit better im happy to be out of size 18s.

I started around 200 lbs. Around 160 or so, I went to a big event in Las Vegas. I bought a couple of new outfits (including a pair of jeans which I quickly undergrew, I think I wore them like...a month). Instead of the baggy clothes I had been wearing, my new stuff actually fit.

It was the first time in YEARS I liked pictures of myself. I couldn't stop staring at the photos!

Several posts here are perfect examples of how we are all different. It never ceases to amaze me that when someone posts what size they wear, at the same height and weight, I wear a bigger size. I am 5'7", 164 pounds right now, and wear mostly large tops and size 12 jeans. My bating suit is a size 12. Other people are 180 pounds in a size 10 jeans and medium tops, or 200 pounds and a size 16, or whatever. I notice this in posts all the time. I realize I'm older than many who post in here, but it still amazes me that I must be bigger for my weight than just about everyone else in here!

That's why you just have to come to the realization that you DO look better overall than when you were 50 pounds heavier - you have to - how could you not? You just have to turn off the "critical" eyes (as opposed to your "fat" eyes) and accept your accomplishments for what they're worth - an improvement in appearance and in health. Take measurements and see how they go down - maybe that will make more impact than the number on the scale.

Lin

I have lost over 50 lbs now, and I'm just starting to get to the point where I am feeling a little happier about my appearance. It wasn't that I didn't notice I was getting smaller before, but it wasn't a big enough difference to register for me aside from getting smaller. Now I am still big (1X tops and just starting to fit into size 15 jeans - I'm top heavy) but I'm getting a lot closer to feeling more normal sized rather than plus sized.

For me, when I get to the point where I can wear non-plus sized clothing on top that will really be the dividing line for me. That may not be my final goal but it would be something I've been hoping for, for decades at this point. But I think it's still a long way to go - there is a pretty big change over from a 1X top to even an XL misses, and I'd like to get into a medium/large eventually. So while I am feeling a bit better about my body now, I also know that I have a long way to go. It's not a negative thing, but it does mean that I now look more towards where I want to be, rather than where I was.

Perception is everything. What you see in your mind is what you will see in the mirror. Changing that can be so difficult especially since we have been "fat" for so long. You have done an amazing job! You are halfway there girl! Congrats!

I use to do this little exercise when I was younger. Look at a magainze picture of someone you think is totally hot. Concentrate on their face. As you are looking at them say "Ugly ugly ugly ugly ugly ugly" over and over again. Keep saying it don't stop and that person will start to look ugly! Seriously! It's crazy! You will start to see their imperfections, even if they don't look totally ugly you will see that maybe their eyes are too big, or their nose is too wide etc....

My point you can find something negative about ANYBODY! Like Brad Pitt, the dreamboat....so many women find him hot. My partner says he looks dirty and that he doesn't bathe! LOL After she said that I see him totally different!!! I can totally see that.

So my point being is perception. Whatever your mind is telling you that's what you will see and that needs to change because once you hit goal, or go beyond that, if you are still seeing a "fat" person you will always see that no matter what weight you are.

So look at past pictures and look for the good, and the accomplishments you have done! See how much smaller you are, and as you look in the mirror see the progress and keep telling yourself the good things, concentrate on those aspects. Be aware of the work you still need to do but don't put a negative statement to it like "Ughhhh my stomach is so fat!" Instead say "Wow I still need to work on it but look how much smaller it is now that I've lost the weight!"

I also read somewhere awhile back it's not about getting a body you admire on someone else, it's admiring your own body and it's own shape cause that's all you will have. And your taking the right steps at improving it, make it the best you can and you will not only look fabulous you will feel it!

Hmm... I certainly enjoyed losing every pound and with every pound gone I felt happier and happier with my appearance. I don't think there has ever been a point where I hit a certain weight and said NOW I'm happy with my appearance because it's been such a gradual thing.

I will say that 3 things help me the most in terms of body image:
1. a well fitting bra, this is a MUST
2. well fitting underwear that hold in my mom tummy
3. well-fitting clothes because I'm really curvy so clothes that don't accentuate my waist add lots, and lots of pounds on me!!!!!

Shopping isn't always the most uplifting experience for me because I really struggle with finding clothes that fit my body type. However, when I DO find something that's flatter it puts me right there on

Before and after pictures help A LOT, as well as taking measurements.

This will DEFINITELY happen. When -- and at how many pounds lost -- is different for everyone. But if you haven't hit this point yet, YOU WILL. And once you do, the feeling is amazing. It will inspire you to keep fighting and moving forward. Greatest motivation in the world.

I hit that point when I was able to fit into a size 16. Approximately 15 pounds lost. Weight training has really helped, because although I'm not near my goal weight/size yet, the shape of my body has changed significantly. It still have fat, but I feel much stronger and can feel toned muscles all over.

I think this is vital, too. It can be VERY hard to retrain your brain and/or eyes. I know it's very hard for me. We're bombarded our whole lives with images of skinny women in magazines etc. that we ended up with very unrealistic goals of what we should look like. We need to let go of that. Give yourself a break. You've come so far! Take the time to be proud, really PROUD of what you've accomplished. My solution is to spend less time looking in the mirror and more time enjoying the fact that I'm wearing smaller clothes. I had a mini-goal t-shirt that I didn't expect to fit into until November. I tried it on Monday and it fit. THAT matters to me more than how I look. I've worn it twice this week already .

The amount of weight lost has surprisingly little to do with how we see ourselves, honestly. It isn't so much when a certain 'weight' is achieved, but a state of mind. I have discovered over several years of consistently working at this that whether or not I love and am content with myself is very much how I *choose* to see myself and what I focus on, how I work at feeling, and not very contingent on my waistline.

Whether I am fat or skinny, my value and beauty as a person is undiminished. My husband and children love me just the same! I can take a lesson from all of them, in seeing value as independent of my size.

As for what weights I like the look of my body at (which, in my opinion, is a very different question than what you asked but essentially the heart of what you're getting at), I have been content with myself from 200 on down. Even though I am still obese and have a fair it of flesh, I look like a woman and feel good in my own skin. I would like to lose more and am actively working on it, but I don't 'need' to in order to like my body. It's a miraculous thing, after all, and quite healthy, too