Well, Nancy, yes. It's 25 years after my husband's death and I still grieve that loss.
Cancer IS a nightmare. My husband was told in mid-May that they didn't see any cancer in his body and 6 weeks later he died. We had been planning for a baby. It does get much less raw, but I remember, and bring back, the sights and sounds and smells from both the good and the not-good times. In my opinion, as long as you/we remember that each day is a gift, to be lived as well as possible and in a way that honors the loved one, all is as well as it is going to be.