So now for some reason I have been doing so well, and cravings overcame my will and after talking myself in and out of cheating, I gave in. No excuses, it was weak.
I think the good news is that I didn't binge, but kind of found I got my fill rather quickly and the old thought of "I might as well keep it going for the rest of the night now I did myself in" isn't there. It is more a heavy and thickkkkkkk feeling in my stomach, and trying to justify the failure, and not beating myself up (too much).
I realize that this sets me back probably a whole week. I plan to go extra lightly tomorrow, not sure that makes any difference in the long run.
Sometimes on IP I just feel deprived, hungry when not hungry but not going through anything to suggest emotional eating is at play. Just wanting to eat the forbiddens.
Maybe it has something to do with the first day of my period? I suppose I can blame that but it isn't fair to do so.
I will re-commit now, not tomorrow, and know that even with setbacks here and there (this is my second slip up) I am on my way to a goal I deserve and want.
Thanks for anyone who reads this and understands, or has been there, or is struggling right now.
Maybe...it's shame? guilt...living in this place of abundance when so many live on scraps in this world.