can't stick to it

  • I was sticking to my diet good until my grandmother passed away Feb 26. I have not been able to get back on track. I went a couple of weeks not even wanting to get on the scale cause I knew I had gained. I finelly got on the scale to see I gained 5lbs. I thought for sure that would help me get back on track and didn't. Ugh I'm starting to thank maybe I can't lose weight:'(.
  • First of all, I'm really sorry to hear about your grandmother That must be so hard for you and your family, but hopefully you can find solace in knowing she's at peace.

    Regarding weight loss, the old truism still exists: if you think you can't, you can't. You definitely will not lose weight if you have convinced yourself it's not possible.

    I'm a very literal/logical person so whenever I run into the same thoughts you have, I remind myself that weight loss is simple: if I consume fewer calories than I burn, I will lose weight. It is in fact possible, I remind myself, to lose weight, I just have to eat less and move more. It comes down to biology, and that's objective.

    I know that weight loss has a lot of other elements to it than this simplified version: there are lots of emotional, physical, and psychological issues at play when trying to lose weight. I don't want to try to claim it's easy. But again, for me and my very literal/rational self, reminding myself "This is scientifically possible, you just have to commit and make the right decisions." helps a LOT in getting me back on track when I try to convince myself it's not possible.

    You can do this, it's about making one decision at a time, one day at a time. Focus on the smaller things than about Weight Loss as one huge mountain you have to climb. When I need help I look at goal posts or even mini goal posts. There are so many people who have done this, there's no reason why I can't!

    We are all here to support and cheer you on!! You can totally do this!!
  • Except you've already lost 10 pounds so you CAN lose weight. Your motivation may be laxing right now b/c you're in mourning but you CAN lose weight. Make no mistake about whether or not you CAN.

    Now, you have hit a really familiar stumbling block that a lot of us have encountered but I know you don't want it to be your stopping point or you wouldn't be posting. You obviously don't want to live and die in a body that you aren't comfortable in. I know the hurt of your loss and sometimes making peace with our losses over time is the recipe for healing but we honor those we love but have lost by living our lives to the fullest. I didn't know your Grandma but I know if she loved you as much as you loved her she wouldn't want you to quit on yourself b/c she passed. I am really sorry for your loss.
  • You can lose weight. You have the ability. Right now you lack the commitment to doing the hard work - that's all.

    The hardest obstacle to overcome, for many of us, is to disconnect food from emotions. You suffered a difficult loss - I'm so sorry for that - and "because" of that loss you let yourself go off plan. But here you are a few weeks later, your loss is still there, and instead of feeling better you feel worse because you've gained a little weight back and feeling horrible about yourself.

    Look at that starkly and think about it: Letting your grandmother's death be an excuse to go off plan didn't make it feel better.

    Now you have to just get back on the horse - you've started that process by posting here, which is good. Get back on your plan. Stick to it through thick and thin, trust it. And the next time life throws you a stressful curve-ball, try to remember that tossing your plan to the wind doesn't alleviate the stress, and only makes you feel worse when the stress is over.
  • You have received some good solid advice, but I would also like to add a few things.

    First off, sorry for your loss. Grandparents are very special, and I grieve for weeks when my Grandma died. BUT, eating did not bring her back. It didn't make the hurt less and it did nothing positive. Also, my Grandma would not have wanted me to feed my grief. She was from the old school, she would have probably been pissed if she knew I was stuffing my face with cake and cookies. She would have told me I was using it as an excuse to eat unhealthy... But like I said she was from the old school, and pretty darn crass and opinionated. I'm sure your Grandma would feel the same, she would want you to be healthy.