Warning Labels (?)

  • In case you need further proof that the human race is doomed because of stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.

    On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (and that's the only time I have to work on my hair).

    On a bag of Fritos: ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. details inside. (the shoplifter special)?

    On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would be how???....)

    On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's "just" a suggestion).

    On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down."(well...duh, a bit late, huh)!

    On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:"Product will be hot after heating." (...and you thought????...)

    On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me more time?)

    On Boot's Children Cough Medicine:"Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)

    On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and...I'm taking this because???....)

    On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (as opposed to...what?)

    On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)

    On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news flash)

    On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)

    On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."

    I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for
    this one:

    On a Swedish chainsaw:"Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."
    (...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)



  • Hilarious!! lol
  • There's a website with a lot of these; I think it's the University of MI My favorite is the one you see on those cardboard shields you put in your car winshield: remove before driving. Really?? Thank you for telling me!