I hope it's okay to post this here, but I had an NSV today that I was proud of. I've recently realized that I've become VERY sedentary, and I often let things get in the way of getting exercise, even just going out for a walk. I joined the August points thread, so I actually had some outside motivation to go for a walk tonight. Anyway, I left my husband to put my sons to bed since he's not working tonight, and I went for a walk by myself. I didn't know where I would go or how long I would be out for, I just walked. I ended up walking down to the park I take my son to, and I decided to do a few laps around it. I decided I would do 3 laps and then walk elsewhere. Well, I got to the baseball field part of the park and there are a bunch of guys playing softball. I have seriously let my weight stop me from doing stuff lately because I'm so embarrassed by the way I look, so I was mortified to have to walk past these guys while I'm all fat and sweaty. At this weight, I feel like I'm such a disgusting blob of yuck, how could someone not look at me and make comments and just generally be disgusted. I made my first lap, and as I was closing in on the ball field the second time, I started thinking that I would just go walk somewhere else. I was getting all nervous and anxious thinking about walking past them, and I had made up my mind to just go walk somewhere else. As I got to the corner where I would either turn toward the ballfield or go off in another direction, I decided that I can't let what other people may (or may not) be thinking about me stop me from doing what is best for me. So I turned, walked past the ball field, finished that lap, and then did another! None of those people gave a crap about what I was doing or what I looked like doing it. If I hadn't turned at that corner, I may have let my self-consciousness keep me from exercising again in the future. But actually doing what I was afraid to do made me realize that I can push myself and do things that I'm not really comfortable with and they will turn out okay. I know it may sound lame to some, but this was truly a victory to me.

Congratulations on the double NSV - the walk and the mindset!!!!!

Sounds like it was quite an accomplishment for you b/c it's changed your mindset...and that is NO small victory!!! Congratulations...and keep up the good work!!!

Ydid great!

What you did was really fantastic and inspiring!

I am often the heaviest person at the gym but I have had to teach myself not to care what other people think. I do get very self conscious at times but I try to always remember that I am there for me and no one else.

Good for you!!!!!!!

Not lame AT all! Good for you.

I wish I was as brave as you are!!! I freak out to easy.

Not at all lame! It's fantastic!

That sounds like therapy to me!! Good for you! I could use a dose of that mentality often myself.

I'm really, really proud of you! You faced your fear and came out victorious!

This is a big NSV, overcoming that sinking feeling about your weight and doing something healthful and good for you. Not only that but refusing to let's others ' opinions or what we imagine to be their opinions guide you. Good for you!

Good for you for getting past the physical AND the mental hurdles!

As I lose weight, it's becoming easier to get past the paranoia that everyone is looking at me and thinking things about me. I think most people are so wrapped up in their own thing that they give others at most a passing glance or thought.

Great Job for exercising. That is an awesome NSV it's not easy to get past the self conscious thoughts. Keep it up!! I love the points thread. It definitely keeps me motivated.

Thanks for all the support. It was actually a pretty good thing that this got bumped with the comments, because I was sitting here after a cruddy day in which I was tired, kids were being terrors, nothing was going as planned, plus the hormonal roller coaster of TTOM, and I was contemplating eating some chocolate or drinking a glass of soda, something nice and sweet to take the edge off my stress. Then I saw my post, read all the comments, and reread what I wrote. I reread my last line about pushing myself to do things I'm not comfortable with and they will turn out okay, and I decided to apply it to my cravings. I'm going to push myself to resist those cravings, and even though it's not how I usually deal with my stress, I will get through it and it will turn out okay. Now I think I need to get moving to dissipate this stress! Thanks for the kind words!