You should be mad- your husband is your partner and for him to be sitting on his butt when the two year old has peed on the floor (and probably still dirty if he didn't clean the floor did he clean the kid?) and to not fix the vacuum when it's broken or at least try is wrong.
I know you aren't looking for advice but I suggest STOP making everyone else happy. Worry about you. Of course your two year old still needs you but if telling them won't work showing them might. Don't cook dinner for anyone but you and the 2 year old, when they say "hey where's my dinner say "oh did you want to eat?"" And then I'd say "well you can't keep me happy by keeping the house clean then I guess I can't do what you need either."
I had this problem with hubby- we got into huge arguments and finally I told him that I'm not his mother I'm his partner and I expect him to take care of things as well. The house doesn't magically clean itself and I'd say you go out of your way to make the family happy and would like some reciprocation.
Like now- my husband took the day off yesterday cuz he wasn't feeling well- BUT when I got home he'd done all the laundry and cleaned the living room. I was very happy that all I had to do when I got home was finish up the dishes and make dinner, and of course put my clean laundry away
As for your teen- do they get an allowance? Well time to make them earn it.