Just needed a place to vent; my cat that I've had for 14 years (she was born on my bday...) is very sick and might need to be put down. I've been through so much with her, to lose her is heartbreaking. She has a rare condition where her intestines are now in with her lungs making it very difficult to breathe. This am she had a panic attack and almost stopped breathing! The vet said she was basically hyperventilating and was scared when she had trouble breathing. She's ok now, seems her usual self but the vet said it will keep happening and not get any better without surgery. The surgery is very risky and very expensive and I don't want to put her through unnecessary pain. I can't put her down right now, I don't think its her time but I don't want her to get so upset about having trouble breathing her heart stops or something, it'd be awful for her to die from fear. How do you handle things like this?

I'm so sorry; that's awful. I'm an animal lover, and I know how you feel. The only thing you can do, if you do put her to sleep, is know that you gave her a wonderful life and kept her from suffering. And when you recover, you can save another animal's life.

I hate that it's up to me, that she can't tell me when it's time. I don't want her to suffer but I don't want to put her down before her time either...it's just not right I have to make the choice for her. This has just been a really long, awful day. To top it off I lost my job as well because of this. *sigh* Sorry for the vent/whine/complaining, but it does help to talk about it.

(((HUGS))))

Pets (especially cats) get to be such a part of our families, it's so hard when they get old. But do take comfort that you gave your kitty such a nice, loving home for so long.

Oh no, that's terrible about your job.

I think you will know when she's ready. For me, it's always about when the illness has made them unhappy. If she's suffering, you'll be able to tell and you'll know it's time.

To be fair the job was making me pretty stressed and I'm very lucky to have a wonderfully supportive husband and life where I don't need to work to make our bills, but it was still a blow. When they said choose between us and your cat it was an easy decision, but the repercussions are difficult. They were understandably very upset but hopefully next week we can talk and at least end things without grudges.

I just want to make the right decision for her. Right now, she's fine. She's purring and seems content. It's hard to see how sick she is and I'm worried of putting her down before her time but I guess we'll just have to take it one day at a time.

Prayers that the best of a sad situation turns out as good as possible.

Ahwww.
I agree with ParadiseFalls.

I'm so sorry... Decisions like this about our animals are heartbreaking... I've had to make this decision twice ... The only advice I have for you is to try to make the decision 'for' your kitty and not for 'you'... I believe that animals who are in pain want us to make the 'right' decision for them... they need us to be strong and step up for 'them'... even if that decision breaks 'our' hearts...
Take a quiet moment with your kitty, speak softly and ask her... she will tell you... I swear... they do...

Awww I'm sorry your going through this and that your kitty is having such a difficult time. I know your pain. About 3 years ago I went through a similar situation with my 20 year old kitty Samantha. She had been with me since I born and being an only child she was more like a sister to me. Anywhere I was, she was right there beside me, when I would cry and was always the first one to come find me. I WAS heartbroken when my mother decided to have her PTS. I know now it was for the best, it just got to that point where it was the kind thing to do. I know she had a great/loving life and just because shes not here physically doesn't mean she's gone. The love for your kitty and the love she shows back will always be with you.

I am so sorry you are going through this. You can look at what is best for you pet and her quality of life. 14 is getting up there in cat years, and you can look at it from the viewpoint of you were a loving caregiver for your cat, and she knows you love her. It is hard, but you may have to do what is best for the cat. I am sending you a big hug. So sorry that you are going through this.

Thank you all so much for the kind words. I'm getting a second vet's opinion, I want a better idea of what her quality of life is right now. They said she isn't in pain so I'm not really clear why it's surgery or putting her to sleep. I'm just so worried of making the wrong decision...It's cruel that we have to make that decision for our pets. If it were a person we wouldn't be allowed to make it, but we can with pets. Doesn't seem right

I feel for you so much! Through the years my family has had many pets and sometimes the "end" is not so clear and there is guilt "Did I let them suffer??" or "Did I end things too soon??" With one of my old kitties I let a vet talk me into thousands of dollars worth of tests when it was clear the poor thing would not make it long. She was 13 and I thought I'd have her longer. But, I loved her and we had a great 13 years together.

She's your kitty - go with your gut feeling. Remember that animals do not know they will die (sorry if that seems obvious but in times of pain it may bear repeating). My close close friend was grieving terribly over her dog (who was only 3 when she got cancer). She did put her down but was getting to the point where she couldn't sleep at night she felt so guilty! In my view, she did her best and she did the right thing. Her pet did not have to needlessly suffer the end stage.

So, I'm sending you big hugs as a sister animal-lover. They're in our lives a while and it hurts when they leave BUT our lives are so much better for their friendship.

Big hugs - its so tough!!

{{{vmo1}}} I've had to make that awful choice twice in my life so far and hope to never have to do it again. Both times, even though I didn't want to do it, I just knew in my heart that it was the right thing to do for my sweet kitties. Don't fret. You'll know when the time is right. Until then, make some good memories and take lots of photos. Enjoy the precious time you have left with your fur baby.