For the longest time, I could see numbers on the scale dropping, but didn't see my body changing. While the pounds lost was a happy thing, there was something lacking in the whole experience because I have felt the same as ever. This has resulted in a lot of up and down moods for me lately - sad and discouraged on days when the scale doesn't move, happy yet frustrated on the days it dropped because I couldn't see it.
Today was the first day I really feel different. I'm comfortably several sizes smaller in my clothes as of this week, wore a new bra that's two band sizes smaller than the ones I've worn forever and hated because they looked old-ladyish and holy cow the girls looked like I'd had them enhanced today, and a glance in the car's rear view mirror revealed that I've only got one chin today. I can see my collarbones, my thighs are much smaller now, I can run up and down the stairs, and I can scratch the middle of my back when I get an itch. I'm sitting here in a fleecy top that when I bought it at my heaviest, I cried because I looked like a lumpy stuffed sausage in it and threw it in the back of my closet. The weather was cold and wet today so I hauled it out, worried it would still make me look like a sausage. But it's almost too big and I look good, darn it! I know this didn't happen overnight, but jeez it feels that way.
I don't ever want to go back. I just want to go forward.