I have them.
Amazing.
Perhaps this was part of the reason I ate myself into a stupor: I didn't want to feel. I have a history where you could argue that I was easily overwhelmed by emotions. Perhaps I was. I know I was criticised in my 20s for being too "uptight" and not letting myself feel anything.
But oh my. Only three weeks into this journey I can feel hunger. Real physical hunger. I never felt that, really. Now that we're reaquainted, I'm doing my best to make sure it doesn't come up too often, lol!
And I'm not going to mention how delicious real, whole, good food is! Especially when I'm hungry. What I'm eating these days is just so much better than the stupid ice cream or whatever I used to indulge. I actually whimpered with joy eating my snack tonight.
And tiredness. I feel deliciously tired at the end of the day. Not exhausted and strung out--fortunately,--but like I want my pillow. It's my second favourite thing about losing weight. I have to go to bed early. I cannot believe that being over tired contributes to weight gain, but apparently it does. Everyone is now asleep and I get to go to bed. And I'm tired. I like that, too!
Oh and I firmly believe that the excercise I've been doing is helping me control my anger better. I have a way to go before that isn't an issue--but I feel much less out of control than I did.
This is the first Spring, too, in over 20 years that I've been able to smell. (Quit smoking last fall). Lilacs are divine. I am so lucky to have a lilac bush in the back yard.
Heavens, I wasn't just obese three weeks ago--I think I was dead.
Now THAT is something to be grateful for - FEELING . . . feeling alive, feeling happy, feeling grateful . . . feeling anything.
