Are you sick?

  • We've discussed our feelings about people making comments about our weight loss. Some of us love it and some of us hate it. Normally I love it. However, something strange happened. A coworker came to talk to me. She had been appointed by a group of coworkers to find out if I am sick!

    They had noticed my weight loss, knew I had taken some time off of work, put 2 and 2 together and got 15. I think they were genuinely concerned but it floored me.

    I thanked her for their concern and assured her that I am well. In fact, I feel better than I have in years. I have been working at losing weight but had chosen not to discuss it at work.

    Is this as strange as I think it is? How would you have reacted?
  • I probably would have done what you did....and probably felt a little weird afterward
  • When I had lost a noticeable amount of weight, a friend of mine inquired the same thing, if I was sick. She was genuinely concerned. It surprised me too at the time... but I guess it's quite rare to see people lose a great deal of weight so when it happens that is one of the things people think of as an explanation. Don't let it bother you.. I'm sure they were just concerned and you reacted perfectly I think.
  • When I got as low as I did last time, 106 gone, 16 off target, and my hair cut (what I thought was) cutely short, someone asked me if I'd been having chemotherapy.

    I reacted the same as OP - but I plan for a different hairstyle this time!

    BTW, I was 136lbs and 5'2" - no way was I gaunt!
  • I had a client tell me I looked really good, then asked to make sure I wasn't sick, cause she told someone else that once and the person had been, in fact real sick, and that was why they were losing weight. I just told this client I was in fact getting healthy, so quite the opposite of being sick.
  • The question really surprised me because I have not lost that much weight. In fact, last week I was feeling down because I can't see any difference.

    Go figure.
  • On one hand, it's nice that your co-workers are concerned. On the other hand, it's just plain weird.

    Apparently 42 lbs IS noticeable!!
  • I have had a similar comment myself-more along the lines of: "Are you losing the weight on purpose?" My first gut response was "Are you kidding me?" my actual response was "Yes". Then the person said "Oh, well you look great." So in other words if I had said it was from being sick her response would have been different.
  • I think they probably were concerned because it seems most people make a big announcment when they decide to loose weight. They tell everyone they are on a diet, they make comments about not eating certain foods or not going to certain places to eat so they don't ruin their diets...of course, a lot of times (certainly not ALL of the time) it seems those that make the most noise give up the fastest. I know that this time around I was dead serious about making a real change and I just didn't want to announce it to the world, unlike all my other attempts, this was private. It was for ME.

    I hope I worded that right. I don't want to offend anyone. All I ment was, since you didn't make a big deal about trying to diet, people probably didn't assume you were trying to loose weight.

    Was it a weird question? Sorta. However, at least now you know that all your hard work is being noticed by others. The weight you are loosing REALLY is gone and NOTICABLE. That has got to be a good feeling, even if the compliment came in an odd way.
  • I think that is definitely weird, but I'm sure they were just concerned. No offense intended (because I am heavier than you and very jealous of your large weight loss) but it isn't like you are 90 pounds. It is funny to me what other people's perception is of what we weigh. We'd all love to be so much less, but they were used to you being heavier and thought you were just fine. How nice!

    How nice it is that you have lost so much weight. Good for you!!! I hope to catch up to you!
  • I got the same thing - one of my managers said "You look like you have lost some weight, is everything okay?" When I said yes he looked very relieved as he said, "good, I was afraid you were sick."

    Someone already said it, but we are much more accustomed to seeing people gain rather than lose.

    Good job on your loss!
  • When I have lost weight in the past, the first question I always seem to get is, 'Did you cut your hair?' then it goes into, well...something is DIFFERENT about you.

    I look at it this way. I truly believe that people that ask these questions mean well. They are not trying to offend or hurt anyone, and they are looking for an opening to find out what is going on. The more private you are, the more people are like the Enquirer! They must know what's going on!
  • I, too, have been asked whether I'm sick & whether I was losing weight "on purpose." (That last one didn't bother me because at the time I was asked this, my father was dying of cancer. He'd always been obese & as the disease progressed, he reached what would have been considered a "healthy" weight. Having seen this, & watching his body change every time I visited, I understood my questioner's apprehension.)

    What REALLY bothered me, though, is when someone asked me if I had been pregnant, previously, and whether I'd had a boy or a girl.

    You all don't know me, but if you saw the way I live -- well, "fiercely" single would be a good way to describe it. That's why I was really bugged by the question more than someone fearing for my health.
  • One of my recurring fears is that I will get to goal weight and then come down with something horrible and people will say "oh, no wonder she lost weight, she had _______ and didn't know it." Then all my hard work will be discounted. Of course if that happened, I'd have a lot of worse things to worry about!!