Maybe this is just a hangover from PMS, but my husband is driving me up the wall. I was SO mad this morning at him for things that've just built up that I was TOO mad to work out, if that makes any sense at all. The anger just carried over to the bike and I couldn't sit still.
Why anger, you ask? Because my husband is seemingly becoming "single" again - at least when it comes to money and the house. You see, he has a younger brother who's 22 and still lives at home with his mom. He works full-time, and basically pays NOTHING - no bills, no food, no rent. Nothing. He can spend his money on anything he wants to, and has obviously been talking to my husband about buying a new dirt bike AND getting the old one they shared fixed so they can go ride them.
Up to this point, my husband has been pretty frugal with money. We don't have credit cards (except his Yamaha card, which he got to help his brother buy a golf cart that's paid for now), and his philosophy (which I've agreed with whole heartedly) has been that we're not going to get anything frivolous that we can't pay out of pocket for, at least until we've saved and started buying a house.
Until last night. The brother and the husband are going to go this weekend and buy a new $4,000 dirt bike using the Yamaha card. No consulting me, no questions asked. They're doing it, and I'll be helping pay for it from here on out.
This upsets me for so many reasons. We NEED things at the house we've not gotten because of saving money. We NEED new mattresses or a new bed. We NEED a new couch because the one we've got is falling apart. We've - or should I say I've - been doing without things that would make me happier or more comfortable because WE were supposed to be saving money.
I think more than anything, though, that I'm upset because he's acting like I'm not even there. I get no say in what we do with our money, obviously. It's like he's still single and can spend it on whatever he wants to with no consideration for my needs, wants or feelings about it.
And then around the house he's living like a single guy. Leaving his socks and clothes all over the floor for me to pick up. He won't pick up his glasses when he's done, and leaves empty cigarette packs wherever he happens to be when he gets the last one. This morning I got up to find he'd spilled an ashtray and just left it in the floor for me to get sometime today. It's like I'm his maid and not his wife.
We've only been married about 1 1/2 years....does this happen in every marriage?