Hi all - (tired wave)

I just wanted to pop in to say hey and that I'm sorry I haven't been around of late. I miss you all so much, but my life is CRAZY right now, and I spend so little time at the 'puter and so much hitting the books.

But, you are all in my thoughts all the time, and I wish the world for each of you.

As soon as I settle into the semester I will try to show more regularly.

:gouphug: Love you all! I mean it!

I lost 1 lb in all of september. And today I'm up 2. So I'm feeling pretty low and like if I ever reach my goal weight, it will literally take my whole life. Never mind... I guess lots of water and veg today.

Good morning all!

Thanks sassy.....They are 15 yr old girl, 5yr old boy 4yr old boy 2 yr old girl 1yr old girl.....I am looking into this gym that has free childcare while you go...that would be ideal for me cause then it gets them out and I can get time to myself with out pushin my husbandand listening to when is my time out!! LOL...ok thanks guys gotta get going...lata

So busy already today! Got DS off to school, got DH off to work, went food shopping. Next I have to take a shower, pick up prescriptions, take rented games back to Blockbuster and then go for my daily walk.

See you guys later!

Hey y'al! I have been in a funk all week over little things that now when I look back on them they are no big deal at all. But today, I feel pretty good! It's cloudy outside, but I am not gonna let that make me stay in bed or sitting around. Tomorrow is my birthday and I have been dreading that all week. Blame it on the economy. Gotta go dig in the garden. Have a great day everyone!

Mo4, this post is for you.
I'm going to be blunt. Please know that it's out of love and concern and not intended to be a slight on you, your husband, or your faith.

Your world is just too full of *shoulds* that are getting in the way of your acceptance of reality. You "should" raise your children yourself. Your husband "should" fulfill his obligations at work and church. You both "should" be setting a good example, so if you need any help at all, it had better come from God, because to everybody else, you should appear to be model Christians. (I'm really guessing on this last part, based on my past experiences.)

The reality is that you have too much responsibility to handle it alone. Both your husband and you are stretched beyond the limits of your natural abilities. One or both of you need to prioritize and let go of some of those demands on your time. You need relationship counseling. No amount of medication is going to fix the fact that he is too proud or too scared to get help, or that you are in over your head.

*****
Everyone else, I'm sorry I can't do a personal right now. Too much to do and not enough time. I'll check back, but won't have much time this weekend.

Hi everybody,

Welcome Alicia and

Momof4- I think Tera is right in saying you guys are just stretched beyond the limits of what anyone could handle. There is no logical reason to think that you don't need some help or temporary relief. I hope the gym thing works out. The workouts should start the endorphins going, you'll get some time away from the kids (if they have daycare), and they'll get out of the house as well. Hang in there.

Amarie: So good to see you. You must be overwhelmed. The one class I'm taking is killing me. Of course working full time doesn't help anything. Are you still working out or riding your bike to class?

Tomorrow I plan on laying on the couch all day and doing NOTHING! My house is a disaster but I don't care. I'm not touching it tomorrow. Screw it, I need a day to relax. If I feel like doing something, not chore related of course, I will, if not... it's on the couch for me. I feel almost giddy about it! I'm sure you all understand that.

Night night all!

a full day on the couch sounds quite nice....This is the first in i dont know months that i have really over ate. Like I really do well at eating smaller portions and not much snacking if any at night. Well I made the mistake of geting carrot cake mix and icing and i think i ate like 4 of them and that makes me want to cry because when everyone else is snacking i usually dont eat anything just because i am not hungry and I dont buy things that i like (junk) so i wont be tempted to eat it....i got califlower and light dip but I forgot about it until now!!! Plus earlier I ate 2 pieces of pizza when usually I eat one but i left myself go until i was actually really really hungry....cause i had no breakfast and only had soup and sandwich for lunch...just feel really crappy about eating that much..
I understand bout the being stretched but there is not much we can let go....I really really think this gym thing will help if I can get it set up...i still have to call because i could go 3 days a week they have the free daycare...then I wouldnt be taking away from family time I wouldnt feel stressed out I wouldnt feel in a prison and I would be getting my excercise that i need...and they would be getting out of the house to!! ok well i really got to get to bed the house is a mess and its laundry day tomorrow and i got 5 or 6 scripts to write for our **** house drama and still have to assign parts...AHHHH i wanna pull my hair out with that...how i got the job of writing the scripts for all the parts and assinging the people....blah....i like doing it but its a LOT and has to be done by sunday!! so ok well gotta go...lata

Hullo again

Mof4 - oh how I've missed you. Honest to goodness, I hope you know that as tough as times get for you that you are such an inspiration. I feel so overwhelmed by the littlest things anymore, but knowing you keep on keeping on when you have SO MUCH on your plate really helps me know that I CAN do what I need to. So, thanks. I think the gym sounds like a FABULOUS idea. Bless the gym-business people for realizing the need for day-care. And what a great chance for your kids to play and socialize, too, while you work to stay fit and healthy!

Hope - Hi! aw, thank you for the understanding. I wish my waywardness was just due to classes, but to say that would be making excuses. I'll explain more in bit. So, how is the dratted tax-class going? And what did you end up deciding about the possible promotion thingy? How is your Hubby-to-be doing? I haven't seen you post anything about pool in a while - are you still playing? I am still biking to school each day (about 50 min total both ways), have started a yoga class, and run occasionally. My eating is total cr** right now - some days I barely eat, and others I gorge on fast food. Sad.

OK, so here's my situation - I think I have survived the transition intact I appreciate where I am, and the opportunities I have, but I just feel a wee bit let down. I guess I was hoping that the move in geography and circumstance would put me in a place surrounded by people that I would just instantly connect with. And I haven't. (and part of me sees that was a silly expectation).

Not that my classmates and coworkers aren't wonderful people, but I'm still plagued by the same feeling of wanting to include and be included among people who could care less whether I was there or not. I don't know why I thought that everything would change - I guess in reality its me that needs to change, but I kinda like me the way I am, and don't want to just give up.

I'm also daily bemoaning the fact that I seem to be incapable of picking up on, and understanding, normal social cues. Add to that that in the absence of any real understanding of who I am and who I want to be I just seem to pick up other people's personalities for a while and mirror them, and I feel so totally inauthentic. And that just stinks.

I swear, I'm just too old to be feeling this way - isn't this something that you're supposed to figure out as a teen? Ugh.

Anyway, I REALLY miss you all. Have a great weekend everyone!

and Tmignemi2 & Alicia, glad you joined us

Hi Everyone,

Mom of 4... I hope things are settling down for you. I agree with the wise advice that has been given for you to consider. I don't know what is available where you are, but in our home community, there is a resource centre that offers parenting courses (read: tips/tricks, etc) for free. Is there anything like that in your community?

Welcome back Amarie. I hope things slow down soon for you too! Your comment on social cues made me think... do you have access to a counsellor? They could probably help you sort some things out with that. Sometimes, people are just too busy to pay attention to new folk... it may not be all you!

Spoz I hear you. This is what I have been going through the past few years. When I did get moving, I'd hit a plateau and throw in the towel. You need protein to help lose the weight. Lean... have you tried the 1/2 - 1/4 - 1/4 approach? 1/2 of your plate is vegetables; 1/4 lean protein; and 1/4 low glycemic carbs (brown rice, baked potato, etc.) The protein is often the catalyst for losing.

Hi Timignemi.

Hi Alicia.. .nice to meet you.

Good afternoon, Sassy... Hope your mood is settled and you have a better day today.

Hi Twilit... have a great weekend!

Hope4me... A weekend lazing is SUCH good therapy! I really enjoy those. They definitely recharge. As for your house? It will be there when you are ready to tackle it. Do what you need to do for you!!

Hey Leenie I hope life is being kind to you and your family... miss seeing you on the boards.

Cathy Don't work too hard ... miss you too!!!

To everyone else... I hope you are all having a great weekend. You girls are all amazing... You take the time to talk to each other. I feel very grateful to be part of this amazing group even though most of the time I just post and run. You are all very very special and don't ever forget it!

Hi everyone,
Welcome to a rainy fall day!

Aliciag and Happy Birthday! Hope you are having a good one!!

tmignemi wow did you ever have a busy day!

momof4 the gym sounds like a wonderful idea. Especially the free daycare part. You most definataly need some alone/recharge time. Especially since you are so out numbered and kids are smart and know it.

Sassy hope today is going better

Hope good for you for taking the day off, you to need a recharge day!

Hey lauren hows today going for you? I had to chuckle when I saw your avitar, I haven't seen Zippy in years. He never was my favourite tho. Have you seen the episode on youtube where they do the whole segment with sexual inuendos? Too Funny.

amarie so good to see you again. Congrats on the biking! Wow! I sure couldn't bike for 50 min right now, my poor bum would be numb!! And just to let you know, I'm 42 and I still don't know who I am or what I want to be when I grow up! Still trying to figure it all out. That could be why I got my first ever fast food job at 40! At 17 and 18 I was staying home and looking after toddlers (my sister and another little girl) So I'm doing things a little backwards. My daughter says its because of my zodiac sign, Capricorns have a tendancy to start life as old souls and get younger as they age. Who knows.

tera I hope you are getting a little down time as well. Everyone needs a break or two. (my girlfriend calls them "mental health days")

leenie, judomom, cathy, raven, heather and everyone else!

Anyway.. I'm... I don't know. When I started this I was a little beside myself as we got a phone call from DdA saying her car had died on the way to work, but she got it going again. Hubby just phoned and said he looked at it and did a few minor things and it seems alright now, it just has quirks and needs a tune-up (it had been sitting for 3 years when we bought it) But the big thing is that DdA wasn't upset (like I would be) So now I'm calming down some. Yeah, my head is all over the place. No real plans for today except catching up on the laundry and I should scrub the tub. Hubby just left to go to Hyder Alaska, so he's should be gone until Monday.

Anyway I've rambled on enough about nothing so I should go.

Everyone enjoy your weekend.
Take care,
K