Aughgh! Ghost, don't do it!

I'm so relieved this week is almost over. I spent most of last night cleaning my old house as we must turn the keys over to the landlord today. Tomorrow will be my last summer term lecture, which is a MAJOR relief. I have guest speakers lined up for the first three classes next week, and then it's just a review and an exam.

Whew!

I did a BAD BAD BAD THING last night....

I got in a HUGE fight with my dad over some old "elephant in the room" stuff....from when I was 11, but still, it's never been dealt with and it's basically ruined our relationship (my sister and I stopped going to stay at his house and barely talked to him after) and we've never talked about it and it allllllllllll came up last night. It was really painful and uncomfortable but it had to be said, and now it's off my chest and the ball is in his court, so we'll see what happens...

but anyway, post horrible phone call, I did some serious emotional eating. I downed an entire pint of Ben & Jerry's. And that's REALLY bad for me because I don't even really like ice cream that much! Though this was Chubby Hubby which is my favorite flavor. I guess the only saving grace is that I hadn't eaten really anything the rest of the day because I was feeling a little sick, so it barely put me over my cals for the day, but still. Ewwwwwwwww it just feels really really vile.

i know, i'd prob get half way through and wonder why i was doing it to myself. But at the end, everyone would have to call me doctor

artsnsmarts: i think given the nature of what happened its probably not the worst thing you could have done. You know why you did it, and i think thats one step in the right direction towards breaking the habit

Big hug, Arts! That sounds really tough. And Ghost is right, you know why you did it and that's a big step.

And now, for a rant: It is SO annoying when somebody says "Oh yeah, I really want to eat healthy with you and go to the rec with you!!" and then the FIRST TWO times that you try to go with them, they completely ignore you or tell you they're not in the mood. If you don't want to do this with me, fine. But if that's the case, then why make the promise in the first place?! It's just annoying. Blah.

After laying out in the sun I went to go see Dark Night with my roomie. Excellent movie. I did so well at the theater didn’t get anything. But then afterwards we picked up pizza, papa johns whole wheat crust, my favorite. Needless to say I had 3 slices which was about 900 calories (maybe a little less because I degreased it). Now I’m still under my calorie limit because I had a light breakfast and lunch (probable why I was so hungry at dinner) and didn’t eat dinner until late. But I am stuffed and it amazes me that I use eat half a large pizza myself. I guess it was bad planning going to the movies at 4:30 on an empty stomach but it could have turned out a lot worse.
Oh two other good notes, one I made my exercise goal for the month of 700 minutes and two I lost 4 pounds this month which was good being that I was again out of town and didn’t exercise for like 10 days.

Tara – is the heat getting to you too? I have found it hard to workout with the heat and humidity.

Cali – I totally understand because I try and go to the gym at odd times, like 8 am (after everyone goes to work) or 3 pm because people are still at work.

Lilu – you can do it. Just stick with it. A pound is a pound! And that is really annoying about people wanted to go with you and backing out. Sometimes I think others think it is easy and then give up and want nothing to do with it when they release how much work it is.

Jaclyn – Enjoy your break!!!!

Arts – sorry to hear about the fight with your dad and that it caused you to go on an emotional binge. That is really hard. Maybe now that you got some stuff out in the open you can start improving your relationship.

Ghost – Totally understand I am thinking about getting a PhD eventually because even though lawyers are JD (Juris Doctor) its consider pompous for us to call ourselves doctor.

i have just kinda fell off the wagon this week... but I haven't gained... after my short weekend get away.. i just stopped calorie counting. I don't know what my problem is. I have been snacking... on things like chips.. ughh... one bad day goes by.. and i think "ok.. back on tomorrow", tomorrow came and I didn't do better, but I am still not gaining. i don't know if I am just lucky or what's going on. I am glad it's the weekend. But I have the Relay For Life event this weekend where we walk around the park from 6pm to 6am.. man that is going to be crazy. but at least it's exercise!!

It's true. Come May, I'm going to make everyone call me Dr. J. Just in time for my 10-year high school reunion! Muwahahahah!

artsnsmarts - Don't be too hard on yourself. If you're an emotional eater (as I am, and I'd bet most of us are), these things happen. Just get back on plan. At least you were finally able to express your feelings!

Gave my last lecture today! From here on out, it's just grading papers and writing an exam. Oh, and that whole dissertation thing I've been successfully avoiding.

I hope everyone has a great weekend!

Thanks everybody for the encouragement. I am definitely an emotional eater, but it takes A LOT to get me to eat emotionally these days. That was DEFINITELY enough to do it. I'm totally back on-plan now, though, and it feels better. I haven't worked out much this week, but now that my eating's back on track I definitely feel more motivated to get back to the gym. Unfortunately, I'm scheduled to work next week when I usually go to ballet which is annoying because I couldn't go this week either. I'm trying to find someone to cover for me and work, but it's a shift nobody really wants, so who knows.

On the bright side, I FINALLY got the new work pants I've been meaning to get for a while now, and I was nervous that they would have to be a size larger than I was hoping, but they're a 12!! I was thinking that maybe the jeans I buy (I only buy ONE style because they're long enough and dark enough!! I'm weird about jeans!) are just sized a little big, but these pants fit as well!! I'm feeling really great about that, and hopefully when I get back to school people will notice too. Also, I'm hoping/expecting some friends from my old college to come visit me during their Fall break and I'm hoping I can lose maybe another 15 lbs by then. It would meaning EVERYTHING to me to see the looks on their faces!!

Finally it's weekend...and my week has been crazy. I'm so tired..going back to work to the normal schedule tomorrow! Yay! I can finally go back to my normal eating and workout schedule.... I haven't been able to eat well at all this week...and in return, I got constipation along with a painful visitor from it. It sucks because I can't even work out because of that. I haven't worked out for 2 days and it's driving me crazy...but it's difficult to even walk...so how can I run and lift and do squats... I think I know what it is but I may have to go see talk to my doc. Hope I am not going to gain...from all this bad food and no workout.

Tara- Good luck at the docs! Hopefully things can get sorted out.

Arts- Way to go on getting back on plan! That's the best thing you can do for yourself, and you hopped right to it. Size 12, awesome!!

I've been sticking to plan, making relatively good choices food-wise and sticking to my caloric limit. I've been trying to incorporate more veggies, but they're so gosh darn expensive and I don't really know how to cook 'em. I've been eating a lot of fruits and whole grains though. Still doing some snacking on not-so-good food that I have in the house, because I just don't have the money to throw food away. Still within my limits!

I tried on jeans yesterday (didn't buy because I was just trying them on for fun) and grabbed a 16 and a 14, thinking NO WAY can I get these 14s over my thighs. I can squeeze into a pair of 14 shorts, but I figured jeans were a different story. Well, not only did I get them over my thights, but I could JUUUST button them! It wasn't a pretty picture but still! I was quite happy about that, I was wearing 18s not that long ago!

I ate donuts for breakfast this morning. One and a half donuts to be exact. With a glass of milk. And what did I have for lunch? A small bowl of tortilla chips and salsa.

My co-op is throwing a block party today, and the kitchen is in shambles. I'm trying to stay outta there - and outta the way - but I need veggie access!

Lilukay - That's awesome! I'm in the same space, transitioning from size 12s to 10s. I've lost 15 lbs. but haven't lost a full size yet. It's coming soon, right?

So I have to be honest, after my wisdom teeth ordeal I have totally fallen off the wagon. I have not weighed in because I think it would just bring me down. I am going to try to get back on track and I'm also trying to come up with a new excercise plan for myself and I'm going to a belly dancing class at the end of the month... I think it'll be really fun. I'm gunna try to work really hard this month before school starts so that hopefully I'll be used to it and better able to keep things up at school.

Hello Everyone, I'm back...FINALLY!

Let's see.. I think I slept about 13 hours today. I didn't feel good last night...backache and stomachache (sp) too...so I went to sleep and didn't wake up till like 1130 or so. Lack of sleep this week must have caught up with me.

I tried to work out today but wasn't able to do so as much as I wanted... 30 minute C25K, and only 20 minute of Hard Core Fusion. But I guess that's better than nothing.

So back to the full gear tomorrow! Yay!

Oh, and I'm feeling way better already about the constipation... since I started eating some veggies and fruits starting yesterday.

I didn't do too well today. I was on my feet 6 hours at work, so I guess that burned calories, but I also ate about 7 donut holes. Yikes! Other than that, I didn't eat anything horrible, but I ate a little more than I would have liked to. I am still under 2000 calories, but I'm ready to get going again tomorrow!

the belly dancing class sounds awesome emcmac, i bet the time will go so fast that you wont even think about it being exercise

tara: you did 50 mins of exercise, thats pretty good in my book! I usually only do 45mins when i exercise, i would be proud of 50

And im down 600g today ^____^ yay!