I have been needing to lose weight for over 10 years. Since realizing I was putting on unwanted weight, I have tried Jenny Craig, Weight Watchers, South Beach, Carb Addicts, fasting. During this 10 year time I have had 2 kids & with each I've kept on at least 30 additional pounds. Leaving me at a whopping 250 when it was all said & done. I made a HUGE move towards a healthier lifestyle over a year ago by training to complete a 1/2 marathon. In all my training & hard work I only lost about 10 lbs, but boy did I get some strong muscle under my fat!! Unfortunately, I only went down about 1 size & after I finished the 1/2 marathon I got very sick for about 2 weeks & couldn't get out of bed much less walk or run every day. I haven't exercised since - that was over a year ago!! So now I am almost 40 lbs heavier than I was the day I finished a 1/2 marathon. I have hit an all-time high of 280 lbs. What has happened to me?????
I am frustrated, I don't feel motivated at all. I know I am unhealthy, I look & feel terrible. I watch shows like Biggest Loser to try to motivate myself & this week I ate a big bowl of ice cream & a whole bag of microwave popcorn while I watched the show! I ate & watched as the participants cried about their bad childhood memories that are causing them to eat away the pain. But I can't relate to that at all...
I don't think i've had any major events in my life that have caused me to abuse food & avoid exercise - I had a pretty good childhood, have an amazing husband, 2 great kids, am satisfied with my job, am close to my extended family, friends. I think I AM JUST LAZY - I just don't want to put in the extra work it takes to plan my meals, plan my workouts, make time to actually do my workouts, etc. What is the most frustrating is that I know I can lose the weight if I'd just put in some effort - but when I start trying I feel completely overwhelmed & the first thing to go is my eating & exercise plan. Now I have over 100 lbs to lose!!
Anyway - I haven't posted on this site since 2006, but I thought if I wrote this down where someone else might read it, I am somehow making myself accountable for my own decisions & may figure out a way to prioritize better & make the time to do this right. Thanks for 'listening'.
Roo