I feel very off the wagon right now.

With everything that has been happening, including being really sick on top of all else, I have stopped counting calories and stopped exercising. The exercise thing is inevitable, because every breath I take sounds horrid (I sound like a rattle-breath Dementor, for those HP fans out there)...I can't imagine trying to exercise and breathe at the same time. But the calorie counting is just me being preoccupied. Gaining back weight is NOT going to fix anything. I know this. But I can't seem to care right now. My mind is always on more pressing issues.

I need to get back to it. My problems most definitely aren't going to be going away any time soon. Erasing all the hard work I have been doing isn't going to make anything better.

There. I said it. Now I just need a plan so I can actually follow through.

Anyone have any spare plans sitting around I can borrow? Mine's lost.

Given your situation, I'd say focus on maintaining right now, until things settle back down again. Of course the "grief diet" might take over for a little while, which could be expected, but don't be too hard on yourself right now. You have a lot of healing to do.

I am sorry you are so sick, and hope you feel better soon, you are right it is very hard to exercise when breathing is almost impossible.
I agree that you should forget about exercising, just eating right, so at least you won't gain, but stay the same. I am hoping you are better asap. cheryl

((((HUGS)))) I hope you feel better soon.

You are going through a terribly rough time right now. Don't be too hard on yourself. If nothing else, use this as motivation. Pour your energy and anger into weightloss if you can.

I'm sorry to hear you're sick on top of other things going on in your life right now. Please don't be so hard on yourself. Especially now it's best if you take a breather and focus on maintaining (as mentioned) and getting better physically.

While I certainly agree about not beating yourself up about exercising, etc., I'm going to go against the grain here and tell you to start counting your calories again. You need at least one area of control in your life right now, and you CAN control what you put in your mouth. Hope you feel better soon and that your life resolves itself in a way that will make you happy, fulfilled, and loved because that's what every one of us deserves.

My heart just stopped when I read that. That is so inspiring, Sheila. Toni, you can't control him; you can't make him come home, but you can prevent him from being the cause of your re-gaining the weight.

I understand not wanting to exercise. I'm just getting over a bout of bronchitis myself. But definitely do your best to get back on track with your eating. If nothing else, you'll maintain until you're feeling well enough to exercise again.

We love you Toni! Stay strong and never forget that your friends are here at 3FC rooting you on.

Just take care of yourself. Treat yourself well. You deserve the very best right now - more then ever in fact. And why not make that the very best foods life has to offer? Think of it as theraputic if you must. As a way of healing. Nuture your body with fresh vegetables, scrumptious fruits, all the best that nature has to offer. Eat on fine china. Use cloth napkins. Pamper yourself. I really, really think eating well can be a distraction for you. It's worth a shot, no?

As far as the exercise goes, when you're feeling better, and hopefully that will be soon, take a walk every single day. Take some time away from all the craziness and make you and your health a top priority.

Imagine where you could be in just one tiny year if you treat yourself WELL. The best foods, exercise. Imagine.......

And you don't have to be perfect. So absolutely no beating yourself up if you falter. None whatsoever. Do the best that you can. You just may be surprised just how good that can really be.

robin
It is funny what you say. We use the china everyday not just for holidays. We use the crystal glasses and the silver ware. Cloth napkins and the " good " table cloth. Makes me feel good. Doesn't matter if we are having a steak or I am eating one of my lean cuisines.

Winter
I sure hope you feel better. I had the bronchial virus and then it went to the lungs. Doc says we caught it early. I sure hope so. Lung problems means major illness for me. That's what put the weight on in the first place. All their darn meds. Take care of yourself. You will feel better soon and then can get back on the exercise routine. I do my walking video everyday but I can sure say that my heart isn't in it. I am sure I am not getting as much out of it as I do when I am really going at it full force but every little bit does help. When the breathing gets hard I pause the video and then turn it back on when the coughing stops and the breathing is better.

Hey Toni! This is a tough, tough time for you right now, so it's not surprising that you've lost your focus.

Not surprisingly, I completely agree with Robin and Sheila. Do what's best for you. Work on those things that you can control and that will make you feel better. Anything that will move you towards feeling better about yourself and about life. BUT - you are not allowed to beat yourself up. Make the best choices that you can and remember that this is all about making sure you get what you need in order to survive and thrive.

That's something I started doing too.. I noticed that I would feed the kids dinner and then take my plate to the couch and mindlessly shovel it in without thinking...

Now I set the table, make sure the presentation of the food is beautiful, light candles, and make a huge deal out of dinner every night (even though it's just me and my 9 and 4 year old kids!!) It's forcing me to slow down and appreciate dinner for that few minutes that everyone is calm and sitting together. (Plus the kids are learning some exquisite table manners!!)

Toni,

to you. I agree with Sheila, Robin and Laurie. Your life feels so out of control right now, but this is one small area you can take as your very own and do what you want with it. It's not dependant on anyone else, you can control it completely. Start counting again and get out for some exercise when you're healed.

You're still in my prayers Toni. I hope you're doing ok, all things considered.

I've got to add something here.

Eating the best foods, abstaining from all the junk, exercising, making oneself and ones health a priority and treating oneself extra special at a time like this has really got to be super difficult. We all realize that. Of course the inclination would be to sit and mope, curl up on the couch, watch TV and stick your head into a big bag of chips. But doing the exact opposite, like we've discussed, the taking care of oneself, etc.., just makes so much more sense. You can accomplish sooo much in a relatively short time by taking care of yourself through proper eating and exercise. And that in itself will make you feel so much better OVERALL. SO much better.

Toni, as difficult as this may seem right now - you can do this. You really can. This can be a whole new wonderful start for you.