This was posted in the "When does this become normal" thread, I read it, and thought it was so very important to us here in this forum, that it really should have it's own post so that more folks here could see it. It is originally posted in the maintainer's forum - but I really think all of us here should read it. It is written by Meg ~
http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/showthread.php?t=51478