Hi everyone.
A few days ago in my topic about pizza, and in my words about how I feel towards people obstaining, I believe I've hurt a number of people.

I would like to openly appologize for doing so. Though deep down I realized that what I wrote might be painful (about how I felt in the past about people who refused certain foods during team lunches etc.), I believe I voiced something others might have experienced in the past.
Nevertheless, I believe that accepting responsiblity over my actions is important, and it is certainly a part of my weight loss process.

Please forgive me, I do feel bad doing so.

p.s. I experienced 7lb loss of two weeks, only because everyone of you was here to support me, give suggestions, offer a hug, chear me on, or offer your thoughts. To tell the truth, I don't even think I am happy over the loss, because this guilt has been hanging over me... I feel like I stood on your sholders and then spitted, as opposed to say thank you.
Further today, I was recognized at work with a special award with money, but still feel down on my self.
(I am not asking for pity just forgiveness...I want to be friends with everyone, be helpful and perhaps receive suggestions....)

CBETA

I don't see what you have to aplogize about,I looked back at some of your old posts and don't see anything that would offend anyone.Do what you think is right , it is not necessary to aplogize for every action you take.You didn't offend me .

Actually, feeling so much guilt that I can't enjoy or appreciate my own accomplishments is a problem I have as well. I'm not saying you should go through life without ever recognizing any mistakes or apologizing for them, but I believe you should embrace yourself, mistakes and all, and revel in the good even while recognizing your imperfections. I didn't say that well, but I hope you know what I mean. Congratulation on your amazing loss! It IS something to celebrate.

As for the comments for which you are apologizing, I know exactly which ones you refer to, because I found them very interesting. Up to that point, I was beginning to be convinced that no one really notices or cares if I eat with them or not. So, your comments about noticing and feeling awkward or hurt when people refused food were very revealing. Still, I have decided that, for me, refusing food that I don't want or need is more honest than taking it and tossing it. Eventually, I hope that people will notice my weight loss, and I want them to think that I did it by making healthy choices. Pretending to make poor ones to spare someone else's feelings (and I still think that you are probably in the minority as someone who would be offended by my refusal, BTW) feels dishonest and disrespectful to me. I don't want to offend anyone, but I also recognize that I can't always control the way people perceive things. The point I am making, though, is that I was not offended at all that you shared your experiences about your feelings when people have refused food. I was interested and found it enlightening.

Congratulations again on your loss! Those first few weeks have always been the toughest for me.

Hi CBETA,

I remember that thread and I wasnt offended at all. One of the things I love about 3FC is that we can be honest and there are so many different viewpoints for almost any issue. The topic of obstaining comes up many times in these threads and many people see things the same as you. Please don't feel badly for sharing your viewpoint. Throw that needless guilt away and get down to the business of enjoying life again! And, congrats on getting the special recognition at work!

I completely missed the entire discussion in question, but as someone who offends others on a fairly regular basis (loud naked sex thread, anyone?), I'm going to tell you to let it go. Everyone here is going through a ton of emotional garbage trying to get past the crap and lose the pounds. We all understand that no one makes sense all the time, no one is trying to offend, and we are all spread across a huge planet and a huge frame of reference. Guilt not necessary. We like ya just fine! And no one has kicked me out yet, so I think you're safe!

Thank you girls...
I will try to think of it all that way....
and may be enjoy my results....I've not been able to sleep well, and that's also a problem which I've never had before, but I am struggling now...I just lay there with closed eyes...either due to gilt, or something...
Another major one for me, is bring up bad foods and naming them, because last thing I do, I want to trigger someone towards bad choices....:-(((

Thank you for being here for me and others....Let the next week be a huge success..

X

I skimmed over the pizza thread and I don't think you said anything hurtful. It is interesting though, that you had opinions about people declining food - dealing with other people's reactions to my healthy eating has been a serious challenge over the years.

When I started, I made a bunch of "rules." One of my rules - Permission to be a ***** About Food. Women tend to be socialized to be so nice and polite, we sometimes yield for politeness' sake. I wanted to be able to eat exactly what I wanted to eat without being swayed by others. When someone offers me something that I don't want to eat (donuts at work most often), I smile and politely say no. If they push, I say no again. If they keep pushing, well, sometimes I am not nice.

um...I was wondering...where might I find the loud naked sex thread.....?

How did I miss the loud naked sex thread. Sorry I would of contributed to that one.

I agree. Let it go. We all have things we need to overcome. Don't worry, some of us have very strong opinions about our weight loss journey.

Oh, yes, the very best sex should be loud and naked.

CBETA, we like you just as you are. I saw absolutely nothing offensive about your post. In fact I thought it was a very interesting perspective I had never considered before! Just keep on sharing your opinions!

Oh, and Traci, I still think about you when I am titling my threads, thinking, "Traci would read this if I put "naked" in the title!"