Hey,
I just want some support, some place to vent, like most people.... I've been doing well with my new way of eating (body for life). I like the exercises, the food, how it makes me feel both physically and mentally and emotionally...it's a good turn in my life. This weekend I noticed that i relied too heavily on meal replacement bars (which in some cases bear an uncanny resemblance to candy bars.), so I eschewed them from my diet, opting for small meals I made in advance or are easy to eat... I told my husband that I'm trying to really make this work, and in real life, to be able to cope with real life and it's unplanned foods... I was feelin' groovy..
This weekend I also got very sick ( I suspect those meal replacement bars..), so I was shot Sunday as far as my work out. I ate ok, my husband made me salmon at night, and it was tasty.
So I get up this morning, and the first thing I go for is raisins, then a sandwhich, and it kept going. It's like I'm looking for something I can't find and eating food out of the process of elimination to find waht I want. I am now somewhat melancholy, somewhat disapointed. I'm trying not to let it get me down, as that won't help, but i don't know why I would abandon something that makes me feel so good for something that makes me feel sluggish and nasty? Am I trying to cope with something emotionally and I am turning towards food? What is it? I don't get it.... I am going to a wedding this weekend, I'll be gone for a few days. I understand and accept that i won't totally be on plan the whole time. Honestly, I don't intend to be strict every day, but why mess up today? We're not leaving until Thursday...
I just don't get it, and I worry that until I do get it, I'll always have this cycle. Gah.Thanks for giving me the space to vent. I appreciate it.
I also notice that when I am feeling down about my weight or appearance, that's when all the pretty young thangs put on thier 'clothes' (i.e. bandaids and dental floss) and prance around the store, or people talk about weight, or something else draws attention to it...