I don't know about that, as far as some obese folks not having a psychological disorder. It takes a VERY strong person to lose all that weight themselves, and let's face it, there are a few obese folks who do go for counseling to find out what it is that makes them eat. I know that for a fact, as when I was thinking of having the weight loss surgery, the doctor made me go for a couple of counseling sessions to see what the problem was with my lack of weight loss. If they think that your weight problem is psychological, they won't allow you to have the surgery, as they feel the surgery won't resolve your problems with eating. I was so close to getting it (I was approved), but I chickened out- the thoughts of being carved up scared me, and not to mention the dangers of the surgery.

Also, yoyo dieting is a concern. Most of us have done it. Think of how many people have lost a lot of weight, only to gain it back within a couple of years. Think there isn't something psychological going on? Depression? Stress? Fear of something? Worries? Loneliness? Missing someone they loved dearly who either passed away or moved away?

What woman/man in their right mind wants to be fat? I know I don't, but I will admit, I have felt very helpless and frustrated when I see how easy it is for me to gain weight, while my thin family members can chow away on anything and everything, and not gain a pound. Many of my family members don't own any exercise equipment, go to gyms, or work out. Me, I've been heavy most of my life, but never this big until after my third child was born. I've always been very physically active, so that is a plus in my favor.

I mean, we have folks telling us all the time "just stop eating so much, and exercise!", as if we haven't tried to do that. Who would dare to tell these overly thin folks to "just eat and stop exercising!"?

Don't get me wrong, I feel sorry for them. It's awful to watch a loved one dwindle down to nothing like that- I've had to coach my sister and niece on the phone, to take a bite of something every half hour, then every fifteen minutes, etc, til their appetites came back. It isn't easy one way or the other, but it just seems to me, we have to work so much harder to get to where we need to be. *sigh* I wouldn't mind having someone tell me I need to gain weight for a change.

This validates my point of not every obese person having a psychological problem that the cause of their weight -- or no obese person would be approved for surgery.


Sadly, people DO tell anorexics that. "Eat a cheeseburger!" has now become the sister phrase "put down the cheeseburger!" They get it too It can be blamed on the massive misinformation out there floating around about eating disorders in general. It will never be as simple as eating or not eating a
cheeseburger.

Can't a gym pull someone's membership for misuse?

Some gyms have been known to pull memberships because a person was too overweight or otherwise didn't fit the gyms "image," and two of the gyms my husband and I have joined stated in their contracts that they could cancel a membership without even having to state a reason.

Ummm.... I am a little surprised here by the comment that the gym staff is discussing with other patrons how much time this woman spends at the gym, etc. Isn't this a breach of her confidence?

Well, I just read through my gym contract (which would be the same as hers) and there's nothing in it about confidentiality except with regards to credit information. All my little discussions have been informal, and kind of trying to "tattle" on her to be sure I wasn't just seeing things and that others noticed that she might need help. I hope I wouldn't get anyone in trouble, I think they just were worried because I was worried and wanted to tell me I wasn't crazy.

Hi Margaret... I didn't mean that you were "out of line" in any way and your concern is certainly legitimate and caring! At a gym I used to work out at there was a woman also who ate so little and worked out so hard that her hair was falling out and her skin looked pasty. I was always concerned about her also.