Any of you ever get the feeling that you just plain don't know what else to do?
Due to some issues stemming from depression (I've had multiple diagnosis over the years, all through college), everything seems to be falling apart around me. I don't want to place blame on anything or blame "depression" for any of my actions...but I also know it all goes back to that eventually.
Now that I've started to lose weight, I've become obsessed with it. (Partly from self-esteem issues and from seeing my success over the past few weeks). But I barely eat (from past posts, I just have NO appetite), I'm exercising regularly (5 times a week - which, when youre not eating, is a lot of work), I'm constantly exhausted, etc. It's starting to effect my work when I'm just too tired/sad/just dont care/etc to come to work. All of that, along with other self-destructive behaviors and thoughts, is sending me into a tail spin.
I've already been through the whole medication thing...it just never worked for me (I've tried everything). I have a doctors appointment today (if they'll give me time away from work), but I've already been through this routine before - the doctors always tell me the same thing.
Anyone else out there been here before? Been on a downward cycle that seems to never go away no matter how much you try to "fix" it? I have a few friends and family that know what's going on and are, of course, concerned...what they dont know is how scared I am for myself.
Any thoughts?