Hi all, i am in need of some advice. Here at the office i work with 23 other women. EVERY time we need to have a fundraiser, celebrate a holiday, birthday, etc. There is more food than you could ever believe. I have learned to say "no thank you". That is no longer a problem. It is just that Our director makes us feel like we are not "participating" if we join the party but do not eat. She really looks down on us for not eating and being "part of the team". The problem is getting bad, and out of all 24 of us here, there are only about 3-5 that are not F-A-T!!!! I cannot eat whatever i want and watch my weight at the same time (IF ONLY I COULD!!!) What can i say or do to diffuse the situation? I have lost some weight finally and do not want to gain it back. Thanks for any advice/ideas................

*Volunteer to supply the veggie tray so you can eat as many carrots as you want?
*"I just ate"
*"I'm allergic. Sugar makes me swell up."
*Start an exercise/healthy eating challenge so that you aren't the only one on your team.

Is it potluck? Start bringing really healthy stuff and eat that. If you are really brave, put the recipe and nutrition content on it. Tell her you are on doctor's orders for a "low car...whatever your diet is" diet for health reasons. Then if that strikes a convo, suggest dishes that fit those needs for the next party. Walk around with a plate of stuff and secretly throw bits in the trash when no one is looking.

Where I used to work, we had lunch meetings multiple times per week. The last year and a half that I worked there I just decided that it wasn't healthy, and I wasn't going to eat the take-out food that was brought in. I got comments fairly often from people wanting to know why, weird looks, etc. However, I just decided that my health was more important than what they thought. I came to the meetings and participated, but just always brought my own food, and the results were worth it. Does your boss have a weight issue? Maybe she is just jealous of your ability to say no to unhealthy food. On the other hand, maybe she's one of those people that feels better if other people are eating bad with her b/c she doesn't feel as bad about eating badly when they are too. If you're present and participating, I don't see why anyone should care what you are eating.

That's a great idea to bring something healthier. My job has lots of office parties too, folks bringing in bagels and donuts, homemade cakes every morning, etc. We had a girl at my job who was doing Weight Watchers (Core) and she'd always make sure to bring in something that was legal for her. She managed to lose a good amount of weight while everyone else - me included - gained. Try it and let us know how that goes.

Thats terrible that it is a person in a position of authority making you feel this way. Is there anyway you can talk to them privately about it?

I work in a similar office setting, except that we really have women and men of all sizes in our group, but we often have food centered activities. Its tough. I don't have to say anything about not wanting something, but someone *always* brings it up when they notice that I'm not participating or I've brought something else that I am enjoying at the same time so that I'm not tempted. Its very uncomfortable to suddenly be the focus of everyones attention for really no reason, but I'm hoping after a while they'll get tired of bringing it up everytime. Until then, I will be the girl in the office that is a pain when it comes to food.

I stole that from Glory87's success story. That was one of the things (of many) from her success story that has really inspired me. I realize that I am responsible for setting myself up for my own success. That includes surrounding myself with healthy choices no matter where I am at and not falling into someone else plan for what I should be eating.

I would suggest bringing a healthy alternative to share with everyone and also develop a thicker skin about your new healthy lifestyle. Eventually the director will surely get bored of picking on you about it.

Thanks for the replies and suggestions. Yes, the boss is fat too, and getting fatter all the time. One friend and I usually try to bring healthy things to our potluck meals, and people think it is a "rip off" if we do not bring cakes, cookies, ice cream, etc. The pot luck things I can handle, as I usually supply fruit, veggies, etc. To heck with what they think! However, when there is a wedding shower, baby shower, or birthday, retirement party, etc. It is ALWAYS cake and ice cream. (supplied by office funds....NOBODY has any say-so in what we eat at these events.) I DO have hypoglycemia, and eating sugar brings my glucose way up, and then straight down into a "crash".....perhaps i can use that for an excuse not to eat the sugary, fatty foods! The boss just makes us feel awful if we do not eat a HUGE plate or 2 of "a little bit of everything". Our Christmas party (catered) is an actual meal, usually chicken and veggies...and dessert is optional. But our "in the office get-togethers" are HORRIBLE! Thank you for the ideas, and keep em coming. I actually got called into the Supervisor's office last year and got chastised for not "participating". I WAS AT THE GATHERING, laughing and chatting with everyone as expected.....I simply did not eat much. It is a really sore subject where i work. Maybe if i stick to my resolve, everyone else will jsut have to get used to it!

Ugh, what a dreadful boss! I would just remind people that you don't make fun of what they eat...This is speaking as a persn with a diegestive disorder and has to eat weird foods. When I throw parties, I have junk food and weird stuff like soy ice cream, and spinach wraps. Some people ask about it, but no one is rude enough to chastise me. Try telling people you have a digestiove disorder, like Irritable Bowel Syndrome People hear you say the word "bowel" and they shut up!!!

I bet the boss was brought up to think food equaled hospitality. My grandpa (skinny as a rail) would ask me to eat something. I already ate tons, he would suggest 2-3 more stuff. There is plenty there. Having plenty for people to feast on is a sign of hospitality. It's not healthy but people do feel internally rewarded if they think they boosted morale with food and good ole "southern" hospitality.

There is food all over the place where I work too but fortunately no one tries to make us feel obligated to eat it. I agree with the idea that if you can, bring something healthful -- if it's not potluck just keep healthful things there so you have something to munch on. However, you should be able to just say "no thanks" and let that be enough. Sheesh, no one should try to force you to eat junk when you are trying to be healthy! In any case, don't eat it!