Okay. It's really hard posting again. I've been gone for... not sure how long. 2 weeks maybe? Something like that. I don't post in threads all that often, but I'm a religious poster in the journal buddy thread, or had been, for 6 months. And then I disappeared the past few weeks.

But I'm trying to crawl back! I'm 4 pounds heavier, but I need to put the brakes on now. It's all emotional, depressed eating, and changing medicine probably isn't helping. I don't know what my problem is, even an upcoming vacation doesn't help my depression. But anyway. I'm still feeling lousy, but I think my copying mechanism (eat fast food, unhealthy restaurant meals, and all the candy I want) for the past two weeks is actually making me feel worse.

So I need to gear up again, exercise and healthier eating. I'm actually at 0-gain if I look over the past month, so I can sort of look it as taking a 'rest month', I suppose. I don't know why, but restarting is just so, so hard. This is the six-month point in my diets where I usually just spiral back to 20 pounds heavier, so I'm desperately trying to do something, anything to prevent that from happening.

Anyone who has fought the all-too-familiar "completely fell back to all my bad habits and now I feel more miserable and fatter!" battle, well, encouragement and advice is welcome. And then maybe 6 months from now, I'll be able to answer someone else's post like this...

I must be in the same place as you cuz I feel the same. I am trying to get back on it today. Hopefully tomorrow will be just as good. What gets me is the night times here alone with food.

Could you plan a "cheat day" or a cheat meal and stay on your diet the rest of the week? I think we get depressed when the weight loss slows down and we start thinking "I'm working so hard at this and nothing is changing". If we can keep our habits MOSTLY good, and just plan ahead for one meal out of the week to eat that lucious dessert or whatever we've been craving then at least our overall habits will be better.

Maybe moderate other things. Take the stairs rather than the elevator when going places. Look for the farthest parking space rather than the closest. Walk a few extra steps throughout the day. Try and take a walk every day. Small changes done consistently can make a big impact over time and they can help with our moods when we feel out of control. At least we haven't given up completely and we can keep going if we are at least in control of small aspects of our lives.

Depression hits when we get too perfectionistic. Start getting those messages in our heads that say "It's no use, I'll never get this weight off, why do I even try?" Well, hmm we try because we CAN do it. Our tickers show that we've made good progress already. Yes the weight loss slows down after awhile, but that is natural. Our bodies are doing us a favor (they think) by not making it easy for us to "starve to death". Little does the body know there is little danger of that!

It is about now that we have to dig in our heels and become just as stubborn as our bodies are and insist that we aren't giving up completely. We may modify things so that we can hang on for the long haul, but that isn't giving up. "Make a new plan Stan... "(from Paul Simon's song). One that doesn't allow you to binge or go completely back to old habits, but that you can live with even if it means slower weight loss ahead.

Six months of blowing brought back more than 20 lbs., and a host of medical aggravations. If I'd stayed on plan I would be at goal by now.

So, I'm back on track. We'll remind each other why we know it is important to keep it up. I agree to having found that the planned break from dieting helps me stay on track. I take off one day a week when I will be with DH. I generally stay reasonable, sometimes not, but I enjoy the time with him without worrying. The next day I get right back on track. Without guilt to stress me it is easier to get back on track each week.

Keep with it! Goals are attainable. Just think how good it will feel to hear (insert name here - lol) commenting about how blown away they are by your new look! (I was there. It felt absolutely fantastic. I want to be there again!)

Yeah, I posted about my vacation and Easter set back. It's just a matter of knowing the routine and getting right back on it. Believe me, I know it's not easy. I'm chipping away at it, doing the exercise, each day trying to get the eating better and better. Coming here to remind myself. Hang in there, one step at a time getting back on track.

Howie and I have been struggling, too. Don't give up! All of us need to keep on plugging away, whether it's for a week or even for just one meal after doing something stupid the meal before it. Don't give up!

Okay, I was able to eat sensibly (mostly) yesterday. I do feel better when I eat healthier, I think. On the plus side, I think I ate so much junk food I actually got sick of eating it, to the point that it's just not as appealing as healthy stuff. At least, I keep telling myself that.

No exercise yet, but I'll work on that later. Today is going to be more of a challenge as I'm back at work, and the place is crawling with candy, cakes, cookies, and everything. Hopefully I'll work something out.

It's hard to get back on track but you're doing the best thing by posting here. Each day you have success the stronger you will get. I've been back on solid ground for 3 days now and I'm feeling really good. So I know each day will only add strength to that feeling. Keep at it you can do it.

I ate mostly healthy yesterday, but overdid it with a big bowl of berries too late in the evening. I think that is why I had a hard time getting to sleep and my fasting bg was 103, a little too high.

I just made meatballs for spaghetti for my dh. They smell so wonderful. I don't think I've ever done them this good before, judging from the smell. AAAAACCCCKKKK!

Struggling