I've been noticing a trend to my binges. I haven't had one this bad since last year; it's so bad that my back aches and my stomach is killing me and I just want all this food out of me NOW! I woke up like this, too. I started bingeing last night at around 8pm with popcorn, a bowl of icecream, a chocolate bar, KFC popcorn chicken, three slices of pizza, and cappuccino.

Here's the thing: I don't eat after 7pm. At 8pm, I was invited out for pizza by a friend. I thought 'Okay, I'll only have one slice, if that'. I thought I could handle it. I had weighed in that morning at 242, my lowest thus far, so I thought a slice wouldn't kill me. But then I felt the need to get more and more and by the time I got to the pizza place I was stuffed and felt sick, but I forced three slices down and then wanted some liquid calories. Weighed in this morning at 247.4. I know that, reasonably, I didn't gain 5lbs overnight, but I'm sure I gained something. I don't know why I keep subverting my own efforts. How can I stop?

I seem to binge when:
- I'm doing especially well with diet/exercise and it's reflecting on the scale
- I'm going out for the night
- I haven't looked on any of my 'inspiration' websites (like 3FC) that day

I try to prevent binges by coming here and reading things, because that often helps quell cravings, but sometimes I just do it anyway. Also, how do you guys handle 'the day after' if it's really bad? I mean, I don't feel like eating *anything* today, but I don't want to mess up my diet by eating very little.

Perhaps you haven't gotten to the bottom of why...

you bined when you're doing especially well... fear of being successful with your weight loss, and letting go of old issues related to that, fear of not knowing how to deal with a lower weight (perhaps sexier?) body? I don't know... but you identified the trigger but not what the underlying reason for the trigger...

Going out for the night - that seems a little easier... you see this as a time to relax, and have fun.. and for some reason you equate that with abundant eating... it would seem that you could work on that mental process... you identified the trigger... so when you know you're going out, have a new mental dialogue worked out for yourself... eg I am going to go out and have fun, but fun doesn't mean I have to go off my way of eating... and perhaps you enlist the help of your friends... select places where you can have more healthful choices - not that pizza is bad (no food is) but it may be a trigger food for you for a lot of reasons - psychologically, it may be comforting to you to eat a lot of pizza because it reminds you of a more comforting time? pizza in moderation is okay, unless it's a trigger food for you - some people who use carbs to trigger good feelings (endrophins? serotonin? in your brain) then want more... pay attention to what your eating. Eat salad first (careful on extras), drink lots of ice water with lemon... and still have a good time - reward yourself when successful with your new skills, but don't beat yourself up if you slip.

and perhaps when going out - you can post a note on 3FC on those days... affirming your commitment to your healthy way of eating... and the act of writing your intentions may help you follow through...

Just my two cents....

Kashi, big hugs. I'm sorry I didn't respond earlier... I admit I've been waiting for others to reply, hoping for a little advice myself. I hear you, hon.

I agree with Rhonda about the pizza... if it's a trigger food, I'd avoid it completely. DH and I have recently started having a "date night", and we'll each have one beer plus we'll share a veggie platter with dip. It's a healthier choice than we would have made in the past, and we feel better for it afterwards.

As for "the day after a binge"... I would plan to have healthy vegetables, some fruit, some whole grain, and protein. Think of it as giving your body a gift...

My suggestions - things that have helped me.

Becoming conscious - if you are fully aware you are binging you are less likely to do it. Often its done unaware (mine was anyway). Some people wear a rubber band on their wrist and flick it when they realise - it breaks the momentum. People also do this when they are starting to negatively self talk.

Stop and figure out what's upsetting you. I do a list entitled 'What's p*ssing me off?' and just have a rant. Then when I'm calmer I go back and deal with each issue. Seperating things out makes them feel less overwhelming.

Or figure out why you don't let yourself eat well. What's up with you in your eyes? Have a bit of a talk with yourself and figure out why you subvert yourself. Why don't you deserve better?

Know how many calories are in things - I end up swaping crappy foods for more healthful things because they're just not worth it! It means that when you binge you eat healthy stuff. If you have gone crazy on the strawberries for example it doesn't hit your calorie wallet so hard! I allowed myself a bag of chocolate raisins at the cinema a while back and later figured out it was 900 calories! It just aint worth it. Next time I went to the cinema I took a 87 calorie mini mars bar. It hit the spot, I didn't feel deprived and didn't overeat.

Dont hate yourself if you do overeat. Just try to figure out why it happened. Dont give up and just try to do better next time. Making it a big deal just makes it a big deal!

Hope this helps.

Claire x

Thank you so much, girls! I've considered what you've all said, and it was quite a wakeup call to me. I think I need to do a lot more introspection, but I love that I can depend on this forum for support. Thanks again!