When I started Atkins...I was SO disgusted with myself and my weight. Not happy about the way I looked (always said I was Shamu's twin or cousin). So then I started Atkins and the weight just literally DROPPED off (I swear at night I could FEEL the fat melting away. It was AWESOME). Yup, no sweat (just call me the slug queen) involved (except towards the end--when I got into an exercise routine every day). So holidays came and went..along with my motivation. I would do well on the weekdays but the weekends I'd splurge on a carb-fest. Then get right back to it during the week. Went back to being a slug queen. NOW I've gained almost all of it back and can't seem to figure out WHY I'm happy with myself. I mean, I look at the "then" and "now" pictures and I don't think I LOOK like I did then (will have to remember to scan the pictures and post them to get your opinions here).
See, I'm HAPPY that I'm eating LC even though I have a "few" slipups (mostly the not enough water, the cappuccino, and no exercise). I don't mind the scale not going down (too much) because I FEEL better (more energy now. Not bloated feeling) about how I'm eating and better about myself in general.
Yet in my mind I would LOVE to get back to 140 lbs (or lower) and into a nice dress for my SIL's wedding in April. I guess I'm questioning WHY I'm not busting my butt to be ABLE to get into a dress. I'm questioning WHY I'm content where I'm at. Is it because of the "been there, done that and screwed up" mentality.... Afraid I won't be able to lose weight even if I DO exercise..... Or am I TRULY a slug and lazy. Questions, questions, questions. All of them I need answers for.

*steps off soapbox*
Thank you for letting me vent

Actually, I do think it's very important for all of us to like ourselves as we are-- carrying around extra pounds certianly does not make any of us worse people. It's great that you're feeling good about yourself! Maybe you don't feel that you need to lose any weight because you actually don't-- how tall are you? 156 pounds seems very reasonable to me.

I also know from experience that you can't really lose weight in a good way until you're ready. I've tried countless times and had it be unsuccessful, because I didn't care as much as I should have and gave up easily. Then one day I realized that it was something I *needed* to do or I would go further and further into an unhealthy way of life and it would be harder and harder to get out. Maybe "hmm, a smaller dress would be nice" just isn't enough motivation for you yet!

Brenda,
LOOK at where you are, you're in the 150's. It is a great success to get as low as you have, some of us haven't been that size since high school. I do understand where you are coming from, and sometimes I wonder if we are SCARED to be at our goal. I don't really know WHY yet, but I think that is a lot of my own problem, I sabatoge myself for some reason because I'm not sure what 150 would feel like, I'm not sure who I am at 150 and right now I'm not even sure who I am at 186. Maybe it takes some soul searching, I'm not sure. But know that you can most definitely be at your goal by the wedding if that is what you truly want. I know for me that if I exercise in the early mornings then it helps me not eat such bad crap because I know I worked so hard that morning. I hope my post doesn't sound like just a bunch of blubbering mumbo jumbo. You've been SUCH an inspiration to so many people on this board, I don't know what I'd do without ya sometimes!!

Lacey

Kate: You've brought up interesting points. I need to remember to eat and drink healthy to BE healthy. And the rest should follow. Thanks

Lacey: Blubber mumbo jumbo away. I got a lot out of your post. Mainly to look at myself and see WHY I'm trying to sabotage myself. What would TRULY happen if I got to my goal (again).ME?? Inspiration? I doubt it, but thanks

Soul searching needed here...

Maybe you are just tired of dieting? I got that way. That and more besides. For me, I reached a pretty good low, I was essentially satisfied with my body as it was. Not happy exactly. I really wanted to be thin and at 220 something pounds I was far from that! But part of my motivation left because I would never allow myself to be happy with any success I achieved. I didn't reward myself and kept beating myself up for not being "more perfect" in my efforts.

Plus I belonged to message boards and sometimes there was this "so what have you done lately?" type of attitude on them. I had lost over 50 pounds, but I couldn't just be happy with that, I had to keep trying. It seemed after awhile that I wasn't doing the diet for myself any more, but for others. I would go on it for awhile, and then eat something off plan, gain back some water weight (which always happens when you eat something higher in carbs) and be mad at myself and mad at the diet because it didn't allow me to keep my successes after just ONE little cheat. Then I would go back and try again and the same thing would happen and I would whine about it. And someone would help me reinforce that perfectionistic attitude I had that if I didn't do it perfectly it wasn't worth doing at all.

So I just gave up and gained most of it back. Now I'm in the unenviable position of having to relose it all.

I think it is fine to be happy with your body wherever you are. If you truly ARE happy right now, then that's fine. You don't have to do this, and especially not for anyone else. But if in the back of your mind you really AREN'T happy at this weight and want to be thinner, then what is stopping you? Are you sabotaging yourself out of pride or embarrassment? Is it just "too hard" to avoid your favorite foods, or do you intentionally eat things you know will mess things up because you secretly WANT to mess things up? And if so why?

Sometimes we are afraid of the pressure of maintenance. We are afraid of what people will say when we gain it back. We are afraid we can't maintain, or can't reach our goal at all, so we give up before reaching it so that we don't have that extra pressure or stress.

Yes some soul searching and really knowing yourself would help. I'm sure it is different for everyone.

Why? Ive been thinking about this all morning, and thought I would think on it before I said anything.

I dont remember how tall you are, but if your 5'6ish and up, 150 sounds good to me....however if your 5ft nothin' then no.

Im thinking you have alot of questions to ask yourself. Ive done this myself, but at a much higher weight, and decided that is not where I wanted to be.

So, if you are truly comfortable with your weight, then why not switch to maintainence. Continue to eat properly and get your water in, but allow for weekends, or one day a week. See if you can keep your weight from creeping back up while living day to day as if you were finished the loosing part of your diet.

Maybe set a goal of exercise 3x a week, even if its just 20 min of cardio, to help even out the eating that might not be spot on.

Switching to maintaining will stop all that beating up of yourself everyday, and maybe set your mind at ease. Then after a month or 2 if you still want to stay where you are, you have already started a new way of life. If you decide you want to take off the last of what you were thinking, then you wont have to loose the 10-20 you might have put on before getting to this point (like I did )

Im still thinking on this......

This is SO TRUE (for me anyway). A lady at the grocery store asked me if I was 'still on my diet?' and I flipped out when I got home and wondered (and still do) if it had looked like I had gained weight?? So many people are saying "yeah, we were talking about how great you look" and so I wonder, the whole time I was 250 were they talking about how awful I looked. I'm turning into such a paranoid person lately.

Anyway, here are some cool links, not sure if they're relavent but they are pretty interesting.

http://www.wordworx.co.nz/whoru.htm

http://www.edreferral.com/success.htm
(I love this page)

http://www.seishindo.org/practices/i-am.html

http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/weight-loss/NU00266


Lacey

WE ARE NOT DIETING! Diet is a 4 letter word with DIE in it.

We are making lifestyle changes and eating healthy so we can be healthy.

A diet has a beginning and an end -- that's why they fail. People get to an arbitrary goal they have set for themselves and then say yippee I made it and now I can go to back what I was doing before. And nothing permanently changes.

The destination is not the point -- it's the journey.

You have simply gotten to a point in your journey where you are satisified with where you are. That's perfectly OK. It's your body and your life after all, and if you are healthy and happy, then the rest of the world can go take a long walk off a short pier. I would say if you have health issues that are not resolved, then you are not done. But as long as everything is normal, then do what you feel.

I'd love to be at 156 and maintain. I set an arbitrary goal for myself, but I may get there and say the same things you are.

Well I disagree. Diet simply means the way you eat. You can eat healthy that that is your diet. You can eat vegetarian and that is your diet. You can eat horribly and that is your diet. Diet is not temporary, changes in diet can be though, or they can be permanent. It us up to us which it is.

That's an interesting point. Because when you go to the doctor for something stomach related they'll ask "what's your diet like" as in meal wise. We're so used to thinking of diet as a 3 letter swear word that we don't realize that it's just an expression. Like WOE is.

It's DEFINITELY a life-style change. And one I've got to get a handle on. I think I was just getting boggled with other things going on in my life and used my weight as a meltdown excuse. Stupid, I know.

Thanks everyone I'm working on getting back on track now! I LOVE the encouragement (and butt kicking I get) from this group!!