I was reading another post on another forum and I got to wondering, what kind of support system do you have? What kind do you want? What do you consider support to you?? What kind of encouragement and or support do you feel that you need to be and stay successful while you are fighting the battle of the bulge? When you joined 3fc, what were you in search of? Did you find it? What do you consider to be encouragement for you? What do you consider to be support for you? Do you think there is a difference??? Do you have any real life support/encouragement????? What do you do or where do you go when you hit a rough spot and feeling like just having a melt down?????

Have you ever had another bad habit you had to quit, such as smoking, gambling or anything else????? How did you quit that bad habit???? Can you use anything you learned when you quit that habit and apply that lesson to losing weight????

Do you have anyone in your real life, that you feel sabotages your losing weight efforts?? What do you do to over come what that person does??

You guys are my support system. Thats it period. My husband doesn't support me...he feels I will fail like I always do. Talk about emotional baggage...I got it with him. Very negative. But oh well, thats my life.

Smoking was much easier cause you quit and thats it. You don't need it to survive. I quit cause of health issues so that was even easier. You would think that watching what you eat because of my health would work too...NOT. Food is one of the only things I enjoyed...again my husband comes into play here...don't do anything I used to do cause of him...I stay for the kids period. Well, enough discouraging talk...I said too much already.

But sufice it to say you guys are my salvation!!!

I have a few associates at work that will encourage me, but I like coming here because everyone here gives good support and they have a deeper understanding of the weight issues. No one seems to be judgemental, they continue to cheer you on and pick you up when you are down. It's like having another set of friends that you can depend on. The information that is shared is done in a positive way and not to hurt anyone's feelings and I like that about this group of wonderful people.

Most of my support is on-line - I'm looking at you fine ladies. Dh is leery about saying too much for fear he may insult me, LOL... he is supportive in that anything I need - like my new scale and the JC book - he is very happy to go and fetch for me... that is really all I need from him - that is what he is good at concrete things - warm fuzzy hand-holding support - well - that is JUST not his specialty.

Apart from you fine ladies I have learned to look within. I am really my best support system. I have done this long enough to know that the only person I cheat when I cheat is me... I t took me a loooong time to realize it but I AM worthe the effort. I ask myself all the time do I want reasons or results? In all honesty, when all my efforts failed miserably the last five years I felt terrible about myself - not so much because of my weight, more because I felt betrayed by my own body - which I feel I know pretty well. I feel redeemed now that once again my efforts are paying off and feel more convinced all the time that there was a mold problem in my old home.

I have quit smoking as well and Vicki is right - losing weight is MUCH harder. You don't get to just stop eating... you have to learn balance and self control. With smoking, drinking, anything else - you just have to stop. Live through the physical withdrawl (a matter of days in most cases) and just move on. NOT that big of a deal. At least not to me.

I never smoked. I maybe have a drink once a year. I like to go to casinos, but it's infrequently. I only ate and ate and ate for bad habits.

My DH is very supportive. He's been especially good since I was diagnosed with Celiac disease and we had to change our diets permanently. He watches out for me as best he can - most of the time. Now that we know potato chips are not gluten free, he won't be bringing those in the house any more.

My best support system are the personal trainers and nutrition counselors we have here at work. When I want chocolate, I call Summer and she explains to me how many minutes on the treadmill I will have to do to burn off the calories in that candy bar. That pretty much works since it's scary to hear. They also help us monitor our food intake by reviewing our daily food diaries and making recommendations. They also help us weekly with our exercise plans so we don't get stuck in a rut and not make any progress.

I joined this Web site because I was tired of paying for bad technology at the other site. And a lot of the people that were my support system there are now here. Having either an on-line support group of people who are trying to lose weight and are in the same boat you are or having an in-person group is a huge help. My best friend is very, very underweight and he can't gain weight no matter how hard he tries. He tries to eat between 6,000 and 8,000 calories a day and loses weight. I just can't relate and I can't feel for him either.

I have all the tools I need to lose weight and be healthy. It's a matter of maintaining the internal strength to do it and not giving up when I have a meltdown -- which will happen -- we are only human after all. The hardest part is taking the first step.

Susan well said. We also need to not beat ourselves up for having those meltdowns. We are better when we learn to love ourselves.

I will say this - I had a roomate in college from the Netheralnds. That girl was rail thin - scarey thin. She hated her body as much as I hated mine at the time (I was still too immature to appreciate the many gifts my body gives me regardless of size). That girl tried EVERYTHING possible to gain weight. I saw her struggle daily with proteins and weights and everything she was ever told to do and she could not gain weight. It was much easier for me to loose, even though that was not easy at all - we know that... In the beginning I didn't feel bad for her a bit - but watching her struggle and I DO mean struggle - I finally learned that a bad body image is toxic no matter what size you are. We are really all beautiful - I like to think of my weightloss efforts as tweaking the nearly perfect...

OK...you have to SHOW your husband you will do it!!!!!! Take that as a challenge!!! GRRRRR!!! Don't even say anything to him about it. Let your body speak for itself!!!! You can do it. Don't let his negativity affect you if you can. Hard, I know but if you show with actions then he will be shocked!!!!! You have to do this!!!!

OMG!!!!! It is probably a big problem for him but I sort of wish I had that problem!

My support system is you guys. My husband doesn't really know what I am doing. I used to tell him and he would laugh. He wasn't laughing at me, he thinks it is silly because he is fine with who I am. I know he loves me for me, but I don't and that is why I need a change. I also have a couple of best friends that are really supportive because they are kind of in the same boat as me.

Melissa, tell your DH that it's for your health and not your image (and tell yourself that too). Tell him you want to be nice and healthy so you will live a very long time for him.

Of course, you can also tell him when you outlive him, you are going to remarry a hot 22 year old and spend his life insurance on a sports car!

That's right!!

You are my main support bc you know what I am going through. Most of my loved ones are not overweight. Or, if they are, they are not dieting, or they are not dieting in a healthy manner.

Also, there is something that a thin woman once said to me. The gist of it was - "People think because I am thin, that I don't have to watch what I eat. That's not true. The reason I don't gain weight is bc I am always watching what I eat."

Among you gals, the most supportive stuff when I'm losing is how happy you all are for me. When I've fallen off, it's how understanding you all are. And, sometimes, it's just hearing what you're doing. The fact that we all are struggling together.



Lynn