OK...so I work retail & last night I had a run in with a shoplifter. I know she was just upset because she didn't get anything, but on her way out of the store she called me a fat b-.
One would think this would turn me off to food, but no - exact opposite. After that I had a brownie AND a piece of cake! Then when I got home, I was telling my dbf about it & I was eating Halloween candy. Crap I don't even like, but I was just stuffing it in my mouth.
What's up with my mindless eating & how do I avoid this again? Any advice...tips?

I've done this sort of thing before! It's almost like some invisible switch is flipped, and mouth goes on autopilot.

I'm guessing the shoplifter was a younger person. I'd just chuckle and say to myself, "You just wait, Dearie. You're next."

I think recognizing the behavior is the first step. The next step would be to say, "When I feel ____ (or when I am in ____ situation), I panic and eat candy." [Naming the feeling, as my therapist would say.] Maybe next could be laughing about it with DBF ... "Look! I'm telling you someone called me fat while I sit here and eat candy! Classic!" Then find an alternate behavior to vent about the situation. Do you have someone you can regularly hook up with about this stuff, either on IM or on the phone? I find that tremendously helpful to vent frequently.

I know it sounds like a bad after-school special Soon, but admitting you have a problem is the first step!

Phantastica has great points. It sounds like you are using food to help you deal with your pain--I know that feeling all too well!

The best way to deal with this next time is to start now in planning ways you can deal with your feelings that don't involve food. I've found that journaling is a good way for me to deal with my feelings. Using online journals (like the ones here at 3FC) is great, since you also get feedback and support. Many of the ways I can cope are things I can't do at work or during a busy day, like going for a way, getting on the elliptical, or painting. But some do--like venting to a friend/coworker, acknowledging my feelings and processing them logically in my head, and spending time in nature (depending on where I am).

Figure out what works for you, Soon, and then start applying it regularly! By the time something really upsets you, you'll have your contingency plan in place and be ready to react in a healthy way!

BTW, in case this is something you feel is a big pattern for you and you want to do more work in this area, you might consider joining Overeaters Anonymous. You can learn more about them at www.oa.org

You may be big, but you can and will lose the weight eventually, she on the other hand is on the way to having a criminal record which lasts a lifetime. She would have said something mean to you even if you had been thin.

I have the exact same problem when I'm upset, feelings hurt, angry, I can eat non stop, like a vacuum. It's amazing the amount of food I could put away. What helped me was writing down what I was feeling, journaling is a sanity saver. I wrote down everything I was feeling, why, then I'd counter the wrong thinking and write that down too.

Eventually I've gotten to the point I can recognize a bad mood binge coming on and can usually get around it mostly by not being near food. I'll go work out my frustrations or write them down in my journal.

The biggest thing I started doing is telling myself over and over again, (usually when my hand is in the potato chip bag) that no amount of food I eat is going to change what was said or done to me.

hugs, and hopefully you won't see her again.

Sarah

Oh ****! I Say We Hunt The B____ Down And Beat The Crap Out Of Her.

Sounds good! Sometimes a little violence helps.

Soon, sorry that happened. great ideas from everyone.

also, that is her truth about you, not yours, your truth is that you are working on your issues and doing a darn good job too.

a little trick that my therapist taught me when people say mean things or speak their truth is to either put your hand open facing out (like you were blocking a blow) from your face physically or mentally and don't even let it in just bounce it off the hand. sounds silly but it works really well.

other than that i am with proudmother.

Love the hand idea, Bunna!

Soon,
I am so sorry you had this happen. I too will binge when m feelings are hurt. Did you realize that you were eating that junk while you were eating it or after...I almost "black out" for lack of a better term, and don't realize I did that until after, and then I feel terrible.
You have to know, there will always be someone smaller than you and someone bigger than you. You could be 135 pounds and tiny, and some 100 pound pimp sqeak will call you fat....You have to just take it with a grain of salt...If you need to talk, we are all here, and you can always pm me or IM me. Kyemom on aol

Hi.. I am sorry that you had such a nasty run in. There have been loads of lovely advice for the eating - I struggle with it at times - but it has gotten much better over the past few months... actually articulating that I was an emotional eater was a big step - and then starting to keep a food diary and a journel which showed the correlations between the two was really enlightening... I have come to realise that my body wont get in shape until my head does! So working on strategies that increase my mental and emotional fitness goes a long to helping with my eating... best wishes!!!!

Thanks for all the advice!! Kyemom - very close...it's like I did black out...didn't realize until the damage was done. Sarah - vaccuum did come to mind!!
I think I will try the journaling, and that doesn't work I'll go with proudmother's advice
BTW....Today was a great OP/drank all my water day!

What a terrible thing of her to say. I'm pretty young myself and even if I was in a situation where I was fustrated I wouldn't say anything of the sort. I completely agree with Sarah - I'd rather have no criminal record, frankly! As for the overeating, try to stop and think before you eat. Ask yourself if you really need it, and also what it will do to your body. Do you want those useless amounts of sugar inside you? Afterall, your body is precious, you gotta look after it! Tell yourself that you're resisting the temptation to binge on whatever because you're taking control and respecting your body.. that approach normally works for me. Best of luck!

She only said it to hurt you - don't let her win! If you'd been skinny as a rail, she'd've said something else - or maybe not, as almost every woman cringes at being called fat. I'm sorry you had such a bad experience.

I am just gonna bump this back up- cause I want to first of all say I am sorry that that happend to you-
and second I totally identify with the eating....my brother has been missing for a month and as the time goes by the likely hood that he is ok is diminishing...and I find myself doing homework stuffing pepperoni down my throat...or anything in the house.....we need to deal with the emotional crap and not eat them!!

*hugs*
chels

Angelshine, I'm really sorry to hear about your brother. That must be incredibly stressful and devastating. I'd eat a lot, too.