Ok, where are Maggie, Amy, Hippohips? And anyone else I've forgotten.

Why don't you guys write? I miss you. Come back, please!!!

I'm here. I've had a lot going on lately and haven't been getting to spend much time online.

I'm not counting points as religiously as I was, but, I also haven't gained anything back, so I guess that's something. Hopefully this weekend I'll get back to the YMCA and start exercising again, and then more pounds will come off.

I'm kind of here. I seem to have completely lost my will to do this anymore. Unlike before when I would get down or have a gain and be disappointed, this time around I simply can't get back on the wagon. You know, you can mess up on points or exercise or water for a day or two, but in your heart you still know you're with the program. I haven't had that in over a week, and I didn't feel I belonged here with people who really are doing it. I've gained back a pound and half, now at 252, which isn't bad considering what I've been eating. But I told myself I would come back here the first day I could manage to stay OP, which I did yesterday. But to be honest, my motivation is gone. I felt very unsatisfied even though I ate all my points. Used to be that at the end of the day if I felt like I still needed something but couldn't have it because of my points, that dissatisfied feeling was quashed by the satisfaction of having worked the program all day and looking forward to the fresh set of points the next day. I didn't have that at all last night, I was pissed and hungry and irritable. Maybe I'm figuring that coming back, in addition to being with my Sistas again (who I missed so much), I can start to feel like a WW'er again, not someone who is back to pretending to be serious about dieting. I'm not sure I'm going to get it back this time, and it's scaring me. Really scaring me.

Maggie,

Just come on back and "fake it till you make it". That's all you have to do.

You know if you even halfheartedly try the program, you could be 15 lb lighter in 3 months. I know you could. Or you could be the same or 15 or more pounds heavier. You decide.

I'll help you any way I can.

Don't make me round up the other Sistas and start warming up the torches. Fat chicks with fire!!

Maggie, sweetie. I have desperatley missed you and your support. Kitty is right. Sometimes life sucks, being on a diet sucks, and we just want to be "normal". But we're not and we know it and we know we aren't succeeding. But just half trying is better than not trying at all. You sometimes just have to go through the motions. Like Kitty said "Fake it until you make it". We can't force you to be here or force you to stay on program. It's hard. But it's so worth it. There will be days when those of us who are successful now will fall down and feel like you do right now. It's ok to get off track. We just have to see it for what it is and try again. It can litterally take years to get healthy. It took me years to get fat, I figure it will take me at least that long to get healthy.

Anyway, I really miss you and I hope that you can find your way back, find a way to make it work. I fyou aren't satisfied with your points, then go up to the next level. Give yourself some leeway, it's better than nothing.

Oh, Maggie, I'm just so happy you're back! I've missed you so much. None of us here think of you as a failure or anything like that. You've gotta get those negative thoughts out of your mind, sista. We all just want you to be here and to truck along as best you can. Cut yourself some slack! You've probably been really stressed and busy, yet you've still managed to take care of yourself in some capacity. Please don't cut yourself off from a good support group, though, okay? Even if you gain, we're here for you. We don't count gains as strikes against you. We count gains as gains. They happen. But I bet if you just promise yourself that you will come visit the forum and chat with us, you'll feel better about yourself and the program in general. You shouldn't feel like you have to push or force the motivation to come. We just want to see you happy, okay? So be good to yourself!

And have I mentioned yet how thrilled I am that you're back?? I'm positively dancing for joy!!


Hehe!
~Amanda