Hello all,

Ok, last night I began Weight Watchers, again. I think this is about the 4th time I have joined and not followed through. I am not sure what makes this time different, except that I just keep getting fatter and fatter and fatter and I am really frightened of what I am doing to myself. I am 47 years old and I have spent most of my life being unhappy with my weight irrespective of whether I was a fit 130 or where I am now, 234 lbs. I am just so done with it!

Exercise is not an issue. I work out all the time and love to walk, and walk every Saturday at least five miles. Its the freaken food.

Anyway.. so far, so good today. I weigh in again on Wednesday the 24th.

Thanks for all support!

Best,
Elaine R.
Washington, DC

8/17/05: 234
Goal: 125

Elaine, Good for you! The first few days are the hardest huh? Lets take it one day at a time. I started high like you and have succeeded (and fell off the wagon a few times since then) to lose some of it. I do however, have a long way to go respectively. I LOVE TO EAT and think to myself every day that I think it is ridiculous that I can't eat the way I want (which is alot all the time...two hoho's, three candybars etc.) even when I exercise. Why did fate have to deal these cards to me? I come from a bunch of fatties and they are all on high cholesteral meds, HBP too...and diet meds. I want to do this the right way and be able to say how hard I worked at it. I want to be healthy for my kids...to be able to chase them down the street or get on a ride at an amusement park and not be self conscious. TO not feel self conscious in front of my DH about my body. I want to embrace my body and feel good about myself. But then again, DONT WE ALL?
I have two goals for the next two months and I MUST HIT them....I want to be the best I can be......for myself and my husband. I love this site for the support....I follow ww here at home but cant afford meetings or online. This group had helped me GREATLY actually I dont know where I would go for all the info I need if it weren't for everyone here. I am on the fence about this....but my points just went down, (I know this is a good thing) and I amhaveing a hard time with it....I mean come on, I just got it to where I was eating 26! LOL>>>>I can do this and will succeed. Have a great day Elaine, and keep up the great work. I am looking forward to the Wednesday WI ! You GO GIRL!!!!

Elaine - I'm so proud of you for going to the meeting. You've made the first step.

You're going to stick with it this time! We all are - because, a year from now, we'll wish we'd started today!

YOu can do this!!


(I really need to find that person and give her signature credit!)

Way to go, getting back at it again! Your fitness and exercise routine are amazing and inspiring!!!

Hello all!

Kellyjo.. 43 pounds gone is AWESOME! Your eating habits sound like mine. I KNOW I am a compulsive binge eater, and thats why THIS time I am doing Overeaters Anonymous WITH Weight Watchers. WW is wonderful for helping you to re-train your eating habits and getting you motivated, but they really are not designed to treat eating disorders.. and what I have is definately an eating disorder. I go to my first OA meeting tonight, so I'll be able to report back tomorrow. OA is free, BTW.

And, Erin.. your remark, "we don't want to be here a year from now" really hit the nail on the head for me. I have lost way too much quality of life because of my weight. At 185 pounds, I would still get out and be social and becasue I've always exercised, I have always (and even now) been fit, not flabby.. so I hide my weight pretty well. But, once the scale crossed that 200 lb mark, I stopped going out all together, which of course on makes the problem worse. So, this weekend, I am going to make myself do at least some of the things I would do if I were thinner. There is a blues bar just a few blocks from my apartment that has live music every Friday night, no cover and I have been wanting to go forever, but of course hadn't because I am so uncomfortable about my weight. This Friday, I am going. I can stay on program in those situations, I enjoy a cocktail from time to time, but I can go out and not have it just as easily. If I am alone, the bar food won't be a temptation. That is something that only happens in groups. So, I know I can go and stay on program. It is really important that I get myself OUT OF MY HOUSE!

Thanks you guys!

BTW, where did you get those cool weight charts into your messages?

Elaine

Elaine, go to User CP at the top of the page,Click on that, and then go to Edit Signature. There, it should say something like "Would you like one of these weight trackers in your signature" - click on that, and it will take you through the set up!

Erin.. thanks on the tip for the tracker! I just added one.

I went to my first OA meeting last night and so glad I did. I think doing OA with Weight Watchers will work really well for me. Don't get me wrong, WW is a wonderful plan, otherwise I wouldn't be doing, but I know I needed more help.

One of the things I got out of OA at my very first meeting is that, urges to binge is not a binge. In other words, you don't have to struggle and feel like a failure when you get the URGE to binge. It is the actual binge itself that you want to avoid. When the urge strikes, don't try to fight to make the urge go away because you will not win. Rather, step back, acknowlege the feeling and think of how you will stay in recovery. Will you go for a walk to let go of the stress.. will call a friend and talk it out.. will you go online here and look for support? The point is to give up the struggle which keeps you focused on what you don't want to do, and to make the choice for not binging, and how you can actually navigate the urges. I use to smoke, and the process is really very similar when cigerette cravings would hit me.

I hope this helps someone here because it sure helped me.

Elaine R.
Washington, DC

1 Day 100% on Program
1 Day 100% abstinate from COE (compulsive overeating)

234/234/125

It does help me. I struggle with this - especially in the evenings, so this particular peice of advice is quite good.

Recognize that you WANT to binge, and make a better choice!

Thanks, Elaine!

Hi ElaineR and all the others who have posted such wonderful support!
I'm also in my first week of WW. Tomorrow morning I will go for my WI.
I've been OP 100% for the last week! I'm excited and nervous!

I am also a compulsive / emotional eater. I have fought this battle all of my 40
years. I had great success following the WW plan at home ...alone...but
without the support of others .... things fell apart. It was first one thing and
then another. And then, last summer, after 17 years teaching in the same
ROOM at one school, I left not only that room, but that school, that school system and began work at a school much more local to our home. This was a WONDERFUL change for so many reasons; however... being "new" and not having anything familiar to me was quite stressful. I am also a mother and wife! Once again, I got so distracted from taking care of me.... then in March, the day before his 42nd birthday, my husband got laid off from his job of 23 years with NASA. Everything is in
emotional turmoil.... but now on a tight budget!

Finally.... (now that none of my clothes fit and a million other physical and emotional issues have come up....) I have come up for air and HELP! Last Saturday, I got up very early and went to my first WW meeting! I have faced every day this week with the theory of fighting my battle one day at a time! I mentioned before that I am excited and nervous about the WI tomorrow morning! ....BUT.... even if it is only a -.1 I have done my best and been in control THIS week!

I KNOW that the key to WW is to make a plan, to work the plan, and to live the plan!
Now I just have to DO what I know that I can do!

Thanks for listening!
take care,
Robyn

Robin - things are going to be ok!! You're going to do great!
It sounds like you've had an awful lot on your plate. But, you've made the first step in the right direction - and 100 % on plan sounds like a great second step!!

Let me know how your weigh in goes!

Hi! Me again! Was just dropping in to see how things were going over here!
I also wanted to share my news from my WW WI! I've updated my "ticker" thing in my signature file to show that I WI at 5.6 pounds less that last week! WhoooHooo! I know that the first week is the BIGGG week....and while I'm happy I'm also realistic about the next upcoming weeks! BUTTTTT my grin is sooooo wide this morning, I can hardly stand it! I've also already had more than 1/2 my water... by sitting in the WW meeting and drinking and talking and drinking and talking! I'm so excited to be attending the meetings and getting support! I'm also finding much support from the people here (THANKS!) to be very helpful AND inspiring!

WDWErin....WHO is that cute baby in your avatar? ....AND Our weights are very very similar! As in I could almost use your tracker as my own! Keep up the great work! We WILL hit our shared goal!

ElaineR, How are you doing?!

ya'll take care,
Robyn

Dear Robyn and Erin,

Robyn.. congratulations on a successful first week! Keep it going. I really have come to believe that a support system is critical for weight loss, ESPECIALLY if you are an emotional eater.

Erin.. I am glad that OA tip was helpful for you.

My weekend was really good food wise so I am also looking forward to my first weigh in on Wednesday. It is interesting though, that now that I am not medicating myself with food (something I have done for 20 years) I am starting to get a lot of anxious and confused feelings and thoughts. I see this as a positive! And, it is validates for me that I really do need both programs, WW AND OA.

Peeling off the layers is going to be hard, but it has to be done.

Hugs,
Elaine

234/234/120

Robyn! You had an incredible week!!! I am happy for you! I hope we continue to have great weight loss. I'm hoping for 2 pounds a week - we'll see! That cute baby is my youngest :c) Thanks! We think she's pretty cute, too!

Elaine - Getting to the root of the issues will be your biggest insurance that you don't gain the weight back. :c) I'm proud of you for doing this - the emotional stuff is the hardest part.

Erin, I also mean't to mention that your baby is awfully cute.

Well, you guys, you know what they say, when the student is ready, the teacher will appear. I suspected that when I decided to really get serious about all of this that I would start having experiences that would both validate my committment, and challenge it.

Yesterday, I got some horrible, terrible, shocking news. Someone that I knew and respected when I lived in NYC committed suicide. I can't say that we were friends, but he was part of a larger community that I was a part of and was a true living legend. I was a fairly serious musician when I lived in NY and this guy was someone many people loved and looked up to. He was also a true pure spirit and generous sweet person. He was getting old, getting sick and felt very alone and chose to just end the struggle. One of the establishments in the East Village that had been a regular venue for him is holding a memorial service for him in a month, and everyone that I knew in the music community will no doubt be there, but yet I probably will not go and the reason is my weight. I simply cannot once again let an upcoming event be a reason to starve for a month where behind it will be an equally extreme binge, and yet, I cannot stand the humiliation of being with every person I ever knew in NY 100 lbs over my natural weight.

Please don't tell me to go anyway because I can tell you the pyschic pain will outweigh any intentions of being supportive. I think the bigger lesson here for me is that, life is not going to wait for me to be at a normal body weight and that if I don't get there, I will continue to avoid even more important events, and like Erin said, do we want to still be in this place a year from now? I can say, NO, I do not!

Thanks everyone,
Elaine

234/234/120