Sabotage! ! !

  • Hi everyone! I went to a concert with a friend last night. We have known eachother for 14 years and I really noticed something last night!!
    Every time I try to lose weight this friend is against it...it is either because "that diet isn't healthy" or "You should know better than to try and lose weight...you will have a lot of extra skin all over and look awful" etc.
    We made plans about 4 days ago to stop and eat dinner on the way to the concert as we had a 2 hour drive in each direction.
    I got into the car and my friend said "We're running late, so we wont have time to stop and eat at a restaurant, I'm going to drive through Taco Bell instead."
    Nothing is wrong with Taco Bell...I used to love eating there, but I told her that I really can't eat too many things there...she said "Well we will get something else later...I brought you some snacks that you can eat"....I thought well thats nice!!
    She had teriyaki beef jerky, potato chips and candy. I told her that I couldn't have any of it...her reply "Its only for this one day...it wont hurt you!
    And besides we'll have something else to eat later. Here, just have a section of this quesadilla. Have the nachos too...I probably wont eat those."
    Luckily I had brought some string cheese and a small bag of South beach crackers with me (I take them along sometimes in case...)
    I ate my crackers and cheese...and made do with that...
    I was good at the concert...bottled water...she had nachos, a chilli dog and 2 beers...
    Afterwards, on the way home she says "I'm really hungry...lets stop and get something to eat..."
    I said, "O.k. anything except Taco Bell ok?!"
    She said "Its the only thing opened, I know from previous trips."
    We ended up passing a Mc Donalds, Wendys and a restaurant...all opened...her reply..."Well I want taco bell...I'm going to order a meal and you can have the taco!" Grrr...I figured at that point...don't say anything else...it isn't worth it...and by then it was so late I didn't want to eat anything else that late! This was also after a 1 hour conversation on the way up to the concert about South Beach, gastric bypass surgery, genetics etc etc etc.

    Anyway...live and learn...next time I will eat BEFORE I leave...lol
    Do you have anyone in your life that is like that??
    She is very heavy...and I wasn't sure if it was a sabotage based on jealousy as I am losing weight or if it was her just being "nice."
  • Good for you for resisting the sabotage! And extra good for you for planning ahead!

    I have a friend Cathy who weighs about 350 and has tried evey diet known to woman EXCEPT South Beach. Cathy is the kind of person who brings a huge chocolate cake to Communities In Bloom Meetings to celebrate a successful season. Sometimes you just have to wonder! She is a smart lady with a high-powered job but just doesn't get it. I think I'm going to have to give up on her.

    Hold that line, Chickie!
  • Ruthxxx thanks so much for the affirmation!! I feel that way about my friend also!! I just know that this is the right thing for me! She weighs close to three hundred pounds also and I hope she finds a way to get healthier for her sake!!!
    Have a great night Ruth!!!!
  • you did a great job!
  • Quote: you did a great job!
    Thank you Kimberly! All of the support on the board helps so much!!! I really appreciate it!!
  • You did really well! Congratulations! I'm lucky in that my friends have been supportive. My sister keeps looking over and saying she can't believe how well I look. I cooked dinner for the family last night so she got to see how I cook too.
  • Good for you, being prepared with the DB crackers and string cheese!

    Hope the concert was fun - glad you have this great board AND a good eating plan to count on.

    You handled the situation really well. Have a great day - kudos to you for dealing so well with 'friendly fire'.
  • You did great! I know how you feel! My husband and I both are overweight and he doesn't seem to care about his weight but I care about mine. Everytime I get going good on this plan he tries (and usually suceeds) to persuade me to cheat. I know ...I'm weak. Sometimes I think that he thinks if he keeps me fat he doesn't have to worry about other men looking at me. Terrible huh? He's a little on the jealous side. Not that he has any reason to be. I'd lik
  • You did a great job. I know I would have folded with so much temptation. Always travel with a baggie of snacks because you never know what's going to happen, as you found out.

    Sounds like she doesn't really want you to lose weight. It seems that our friends don't really understand why we want to lose the weight and are intimidated by our loss. I have people who tell me I should stop exercising and dieting because I'm fine now. Well, if I stop I'll gain it all back..so no, thanks. I've changed my lifestyle and it includes eating healthy and exercising.

    This maybe a friend that you might need to let go...or have some sort of coping mechanism when you get together. Like you mentioned, eat before you go, have a larger snack just in case.
  • UGH.. that sucks! My friends are generally suportive. But the other day I mentioned to my friend that I wanted to go out on a girls night out. She agreed and said she had a great coupon for a pasta dish. I told her I could not eat that and she told me to forget it... I'm no fun! But she was joking of course. She just said that we better go to a place that serves lettuce. LOL.....
  • My friends have been supportive, so I've been lucky. But then again, they are all thinner than me!

    You did a GREAT job!!! I probably would have given in. But you stuck it out.
  • Shortie You Rock! She was probably doing it unconciously (I hope) People get nervous when Other people try to alter their lives. My Sister used to be my major Sabateur I think especially when 2 friends are heavy and one begins to lose weight or do anything to get healthy the other one feels left behind and wants someone to be in their situation
  • You did Great!!!

    The biggest sabotage I have to deal with is my mother. I guess she likes me to be as overweight as she is. I let it slip what I weigh now and she got really upset and told me that I couldn't weigh less than her. And ever since then she has been offering me everything she know I love to try to get me to gain weight back on. Go figure you would think she would want me to be healthy.

  • Way to handle a tough situation! Try to remember, when it gets tough to stay on track, how motivated you were last night!

    Definitely sabotage. It's hard when someone you care for treats you that way. I'm sorry you had to deal with it, but deal with it you did! and admirably!

    Barb
  • Wow!!! Thank you!! All of your support has given me the warm fuzzies and brought happy tears to my eyes!!
    I don't know what is different about this time around...I think it is because I am having health issues, but food is not as important to me as it used to be!! It is such a wonderful feeling...almost a freedom of sorts!!
    I thank you all for the encouragement and the hoorahs!!! ((((((((((Huggies))))))))))))) to all of you!!!