Well, here we are at the start of another new week and likely a difficult day for those celebrating "the 4th". Have fun, folks, but try to behave so you don't end up remembering this special day as the one you "blew big time"! Good luck!!

Hmmm....I seem rather alone here tonight. I hope those of you who celebrated the 4th of July are just worn out from activity and too tired to post how well you did! As for the rest of you...I'll give you until noon tomorrow to show up!

Points
Breakfast
3 – Kashi Go Lean cereal, with
1 – 1/2c 1% milk
Snack
1 – Watermelon
Lunch
0 – Salad of spinach and tomatoes, with
1 – Light balsamic vinaigrette
3 – Tuna mixed with celery, lemon juice and black pepper
Snack
1 – Cherries (fresh home grown from the neighbours)
Dinner
3 – Chicken breast (BBQ'd with skin removed)
2 – new potatoes
1 – baby carrots
Snack
1 – two slices of Weight Watchers 60% whole wheat bread (toasted) with
2 – 1 tbsp. peanut butter
2 – 1c 1% milk
21 total (1 under target)

Beverages: large mug of tea, 2 500ml bottles of spring water, 2 cans of club soda, 1 small bottle of Perrier water, 1 cup of 1% milk

Exercise: 20min morning walk with dog, 1/2hr. evening walk with dog, late night jog around highschool track – made it 4 times around the quarter-mile track, but walked the last few hundred feet.

OK, OK Jilly,
I haven't been posting on the journal buddy thread for a while because it's a pain to post here and in fitday...but to get the collective butt in gear..here I am!

Breakfast
Tea w/milk and sugar
Bowl of...eeek...strawberry honeycombs...don't hit me!
With .5 cup 1% milk

Lunch

1 oz Marble cheese
Soda Crackers (had this on the way to grocery shopping so I wouldn't go nuts)

Dinner

2 cups spaghetti with Mom's awesome (tiny bit of meat and tons 'o' veggies) tomato sauce
Parmesan
big salad with light ranch

tons of water

xoxo
Linda

I need to own up to it, because I feel awful hiding. I've had a dreadful week. I can come up with a lot of excuses that boil down to a break in my structured routine (houseguests for 4 days and a week on a business trip). It doesn't really matter. What matters is that I have made a royal mess of all of my plans -- eating, exercising, or otherwise. My complete lack of ability to maintain control steered me straight into depression, where I've been binging since Friday. I don't even like what I'm eating. I'm disgusted with myself during and after. I feel like such a horrible failure. Why can't I just do this? I know what I'm supposed to do. I'm miserable being this heavy and yet I don't stop myself when my actions accomplish nothing but ensuring I stay just as I am or worse. I think the thing that scares me the most is how quickly I went from feeling in control and making good choices and good progress to this -- eating until I'm sick, crying uncontrollably because I hate what I'm doing, and fearing that I won't ever be able to beat these urges/behaviors.

Sorry to be a downer. I just thought it was important to let you know I'm struggling. I'm going to force myself back on track, but I need to do some soul searching to figure out where I went wrong (where to start?!) and how on earth I'm going to manage to keep it from getting this bad again.

I'm not going to come down hard on you Cecily because what you wrote is very familiar to me. I, too, have eaten to the point where I feel uncomfortable both physically and emotionally. When I'm in binge mode I'll eat practically anything that's edible, whether I like it or not. Rest assured YOU ARE NOT ALONE! But fear not, my dear - the fact that you're here owning up to it shows you're not willing to prolong that kind of behaviour, so put it behind you and just start fresh tomorrow. Do all those things you were doing before you went off track and always remember that you can and will be successful! I'm going to be realistic and say I can't promise those urges will go away forever - god knows I struggle from time to time even after all this time - but we have a lot of tools at our disposal (not the least of which is this site) and the more we use them the stronger our defenses will be against doing that wholly unrational and unexplainable binging which in no way provides comfort, but makes us so unhappy instead. We can do it Cecily, I know we can!

:Hugs: Cecily, sorry to hear you are having a hard time...
Glad to see you're posting and getting your feelings expressed! Here to listen and support you anytime you need.

July 4, 2005
Proud of myself. While shopping, went out for lunch at a buffet over flowing with waaaaay to many bad food choices but I did well. I drank alot of diet soda though, which is OK on my food plan, but I don't like consuming that much artificial sweetner and limit myself to 2 cans or 1 bottle of diet beverages per day but today was a holiday.

B: 10 oz berry-banana smoothie (1 frozen banana, 1 c mixed assortment of frozen berries, 1/2 cup fat-free vanilla yogurt, 2/3 cup van soymilk); 1 sliced whole wheat toast topped with peanut butter

L: 1 cup chicken noodle soup; 1 small corn muffin with 1 tsp butter; large salad (2 cups mixed salad greens topped with 1/4 c peas, 1/4 c chickpeas, 3 TBS chopped red onion, 1/4 c shredded cheese, 1/4 of a tomato, 1/2 cup cucumber, 2 TBS bacon bits, 3 TBS sunflower seeds and 2 oz honey mustard dressing); 2"x2" square of chocolate cake with chocolate frosting and 1/4 c fat-free/sugar-free vanilla ice cream

D: 1 c watermelon; 1/2 of a hamburger on bun; 1 brat

S: 1 oatmeal cream snack cake; 1 slice whole wheat bread with 2 TBS peanut butter; 1 banana

Beverages: 48 oz Sprite Zero; 12 oz diet cream soda; 60 oz water; 12 oz choc soymilk

Exercise: 8 Minute Moves
1 1/2 hours shopping
Did NOT do my 30-60 minutes of Cardio today which makes me upset. Could have fit it into my day had I gotten up 1 hour earlier this morning. I have no excuse; just like to hang out in bed when I have the chance and this really hurt me on days I have lots to do.

Cecily ~ I could have written that word for word. I totally understand! (((HUGS))) We are here for you! You can do it!!

-----------------

Since my DH worked, I didn't do anything special for the 4th which didn't disrupt my eating plans - makes it easy on me.

Breakfast: Kashi & 1% milk
Lunch: Scrambled eggs, hash browns, bacon
Dinner: Grilled portobello, wild mushroom couscous, italian salad (lettuce, salami, pepperoni, olives, celery, provolone, carrots, oil & vinegar)
Snacks: Granola Bar & Low sugar ice cream w/lite chocolate sauce
Drinks: orange juice & water

Exercise: Walked for 90 minutes with the kiddos...well, really only about 45 minutes of walking, the rest was playing at the playground and chatting w/neighbors.

kcal: 1778

Cecily - you did a brave thing coming here and writing about what you are experiencing. Believe me, you are not alone in fighting that particular cycle.....but you can do it - you have a lot of people here, all rooting for you, and ready to help you out however they can!

As for me, *makes bowing and worshipping motions in an attempt to placate the Frightening Force of Jill*....I have been somewhat absent, its true, due to excessive busyness (mainly work), but I have been making good healthy food choices (not entirely easy since the excessive busyness has involved a lot of work lunches and dinners), and even went swimming on Saturday, and to aquarobics on Sunday. So here is Monday:

Porridge, coffee
Tuna salad, apple
Paella, 2 apples
Ryvita, jam (OK, I'm meant to avoid sugar for health reasons, but it is that time of the month when sweet cravings kick in.....could have been a lot worse!)

25 min walk

I haven't posted on this thread in quite some time, but after a horrendous gain last week (I'm hoping mostly water weight), I think I need to get back into the swing of things here.

Today:

• omelette w/spinach, crushed red pepper, onion pwder, and Mrs. Dash
• egg salad w/ff mayo, mustard, onion powder, and paprika
• baked ham
• fruit (pineapple, apple slices, peach slices, kiwi slices, and grapes)
• boneless, skinless chicken w/bbq sauce

Yesterday (4th of July--luckily no picnics to go to!):

• omelette w/spinach, broccoli, diced tomatoes, onion powder, and crushed red pepper (today's omelette was actually much tastier than this one)
• pasta w/tomato sauce
• 2 turkey burger patties w/ff mayo and bbq sauce (no buns)
• boneless, skinless chicken w/bbq sauce
• strawberry-banana smoothies for dessert (bananas, frozen strawberries, milk, and vanilla extract)

I also had 11 servings of water yesterday (in addition to any diet soda and sugar-free kool aid I had--I don't count those in my water intake) and am working on bottle #1 (3 servings) of water for today. Guzzle guzzle guzzle!

Just checking in, I'm doing ok. I had a 2lb loss last week! All that cardio sure paid off....

I had kinda of a "loose" weekend, meaning I stayed on plan most of the time, but did have a few "extras". I'm back at work today and I just had PT, so I'm totally back on track.

Have a good day everyone!

I've been fluctuating between 221 - 225 for about 2 weeks now, so I'm starting to journal again in the hopes that I can break this slump and move into my next decade. 219 is a big goal for me, just because I haven't seen that decade in a while. So, back on the wagon again with full speed.

Today's Eats
Breakfast-
1 cup cottage cheese
Snack-
1 cup mandarin oranges (packed in juice)
Lunch-
1 bowl of Lentil Soup
1 tomato Sandwich
Dinner -
Chicken Salad Salad
Snack -
Whatchamacalllit Bar

Total Calories for the day:
1600

Hmph! I've been posting my scran on here (well, last week's thread), but the posts seem to have vanished! My JULY Points Challenge posts disappeared too. Is someone trying to give me a hint? If so, too bad; you're all stuck with me!

So, yesterday Mon 04/07:

Breakfast: Pineapple shake (1 cup tinned pineapple, ¾ cup 2% plain yogurt, ice, orange extract), 2 thin slices ham.
Lunch: 2 tblsp. Phili Light, 10 Triscuits (50% less fat), naked coleslaw, ice lolly.
Dinner: 3½ oz chicken breast, 2 oz whole wheat couscous, 1 cup peas, carrots, cauliflower, broccoli, 1 oz cheddar.
Snacks: Ice lolly, 5 oz cherries.
Drinks: 500 ml coffee, 2½ litres water, 750 ml bottle sparkling water.

Total kcals: 1317 (plus free veggies).

Exercise: 2.34 mile walk.

Tues 05/07:

Breakfast: 10 Reduced fat Triscuits, 1 tblsp. Phili Light.
Lunch: 4½ oz chicken breast, 80 g whole grain bun, naked coleslaw, 169 g strawberries.
Dinner: 6 oz salmon fillet, 2 oz whole wheat couscous, 1 cup peas, green beans, 4½ oz strawberries with 2 tblsp. half & half.
Snacks: ½ oz almonds, 5 oz cherries, ice lolly.
Drinks: 500 ml coffee, 3 litres water, 500 ml green tea.

Total kcals: 1441 (plus free veggies).

Exercise: 2.41 mile walk.

Tuesday

Porridge, coffee
Peppers stuffed with rice and vegetables
Apple, orange, banana? (its been a long day, and I truly cannot remember....)
Mackerel cooked in spicy tomato sauce, sweet potatoes, rice
1.5, or maybe 2 glasses red wine

35 min walk

Here's my tuesday.

Breakfast:

1 slice weightwatchers 60% whole wheat bread (thanks Jilly!!!)
1 egg basted
bit of ketchup
1/2 c. fat free cottage cheese

Lunch:

fat free sugar free yogurt smoothie
(1 container yougurt)
banana
ice
1tbsp raspberry jam (more fruit less sugar)

Dinner:

3.25 oz. cod
corn on the cob
1c. baby carrots
margarine

Snack:
Air popped popcorn with 2 teaspoons marg.

Total 1195
Water 120 oz.

Linda