I sorta fell asleep, thinking about how hard it was today...I woke up...and totally binged. Out of control. I hate myself right now! I even thought about making myself throw it up, but don't worry, I didn't...I don't even want to start down that road.

Knowing this diet, I'll probably be back at where I started in the morning.

Did something happen today to make you upset or were you worried about something ?
If you cant say thats fine but it sounds like you had a emotional trigger.. And or you didnt eat enough for your daily intake.
Its alright. When this happens you have to let it go and move on to the next meal and just plan it out and forget about that slip up. They will happen when your working your way to a more heathy you. These are the battles you have to beat and overcome to stay in the fight later.
Its a learning thing sort of speak. Once you know what triggered this one you will remember that instead of going and eating you need to do something else. Talk to someone, either the person that made you angry , hurt, sad. Or just some one who will listen. Or just go for a nice walk and think about why your feeling like this.
You will be your saving crutch. Once you can work these out for yourself when they happen again you will have them beat.

I agree with Morticia. The key here now is to figure out why. Did you binge for emotional reasons, or were you hungry and not getting enough calories.

Whatever it is take it into account and find a way to avoid it in the future.

CA85~ Don't hate yourself! You are human, just like all of us! If we all hated ourselves everytime we slipped up, none of us would be successful. One slip up, or even two or three or four, is NOT going to sabatoge your weight loss. Making a mistake one day is just barely a *blip* on the radar when you consider that we are in this for the long haul. I made a mistake last week... ate Taco Bell and other junk... I didn't even stress about it, and neither should you. I still lost weight because I realized my mistake, told myself it was OKAY, and got back on plan.

As long as you get back on plan, it is okay that you woke up and binged. Hating yourself is NOT going to help you build a healthy mind and body... loving yourself, even through mistakes, WILL help you build a healthy mind and body. You do love yourself. I know this because you come to these boards, give support, and are trying to get healthy. You are just mad at yourself right now, and that is okay. Just forgive yourself and move on. You are no different than any of us... We all make mistakes, but then we move on, and so will you.

Oh, this is so nothing to hate yourself over! That's such strong language. It's just food. It's just weight. Yes, it's important to our health and looks, etc., but concentrate on feeling good about the efforts you're making, the progress. And, really, if any of us never "make it," are we really any less important or good or worthwhile than we would have been if we had gotten thin? Perspective, my dear. It'll keep you from going insane! That said, I know how rotten it feels when you screw up and pig out. Important now is to not let it turn into a daylong or weeklong or even another-second-more-long binge. It's done, it's over with. As the others have said, figure out why it happened, take away whatever lesson from it that you need to, and then kiss it goodbye. Also, it sounds as if you're looking at your weight from a day-to-day point of view. That's never good. Think about balance and your eating habits from week to week or month to month. Not day to day.

Finally, the reponses here bring up an interesting question. A lot of people often blame their bad dietary habits on "emotional eating." While I'm sure that happens quite often and with everyone, to some degree, it seems that the people who say that often are chronic dieters who probably aren't eating enough calories anyway. So an emotional blip in their day sends them to the fridge or fast-food store. Perhaps if we are arming their bodies with the nutrients and calories they need, we wouldn't be so quick to tuirn to food in emotional times. I can see my body saying, "Oh, we're upset. OK, this is a good time to get her to eat all those calories she's been neglecting to give me." Maybe if my body was nourished, it would say, "Oh, we're upset. Well, I'm pretty satisfied food-wise, maybe I'll nudge her to take a bubble bath or call her girlfriend."

I agree with all the girls, brush yourself off, get on the wagon and keep movin' on.... Your next healthy meal is only 2 hours away... Forgive yourself!

Thank you guys. My family is out of town, so even though it was almost 3 am I ran a mile on the treadmill to relieve myself on some of the guilt. I'm always a bit more irrational late at night...so this morning I'm feeling much better and ready to continue. I'm going to try to avoid the scale and concentrate on getting that "thin" feeling back.

Thank goodness for you all, without your comments and support I might have said "screw it all!" and not gotten my motivation back!

It's not a guilt issue. Don't beat yourself up on that account. You are not a moral failure if you eat more one day.

A whole lot of this is biology. Figure out if you ate something that triggered eating more.

Sometimes, our body NEEDS certain things - protein, micronutrients, whatever.

Sometimes, it can be a comfort situation. And it might even be appropriate.

The right response is to decide what triggered it, really figure out how much you binged (and a lot of time, when you really count the calories up, it's not nearly as awful as the fear of it), and learn ways to short circuit the wrong types of eating.

But feeling like a failure or guilty because you ate is a no-win strategy.

It's not a moral failure. It's a day when you ate more than you wanted. So go on and eat like you really want to the next day and learn a little bit more about how your mind and body work.

So I realized that I haven't been getting nearly enough calories, because this medicine I'm taking just leaves me with no appetite. I have to force down a lot of the food I DO eat during the day...

So today I tried to focus more on eating more substantial things...and talked to my mom about ways to not eat more, but to get more calories in nutrient packed ways. For example, when I dont' feel like snacking but need to to keep my metabolism going, I'll have a tsp or tbsp of reduced fat peanut butter (protein, and good fat, but not too much.)

I hope this turns things around and gets this weight loss going again!

BTW, I don't think I'll have another binge attack that badly after how bad and literally sick to my stomach I felt last night.

Thank you SO, so much for your support!