Weclome to May and our new challenge! Many of us are Mothers and if we are not a Mother, we are a woman! This month of May, let us challenge the value of being that woman...of finding out what our real potential is...not only on the "outside" but on the "inside".

Join us as we depart daily with a question which may help guide us down the path we want to go...which may inspire us to do our best...and which may provoke us into being the woman we all really want to be.

We all know what we have to do physically to overcome our weight issues...we eat less, we exercise. Let's state our physical goals here, but let's also try to have a goal in mind which can help us deal with the lack of momentum, or lack of desire or any of those things which prevent us from moving forward.

Ralph Marston (one of my favorite motivational writers) says this:

"Adapt and prosper.

When conditions change, some people become immobilized by worry. Other people compain. Still others make the changing conditions into an excuse for not taking action. What do successful people do when conditions change? Successful people adapt. That's what makes them consistenly successful.

When conditions change, suddenly there can be plenty of reasons to give up. Suddenly there can be plenty of perfectly understandable justifications for not moving forward. Suddenly there can be an abundance of excuses for failure.

And yet, when conditions change there are also great opportunities. Some people will have the confidence to recognize those opportunities and act upon them. Someday everyone will say those people were lucky, that they were in the right place at the right time.

The truth is, when you're willing and able to adapt, you're always in the right place at the right time. Those who recognize that fact and take advantage of it by adapting in a positive way to changing conditions will be very fortunate indeed."

Let's start this challenge off with asking ourselves this:
What am I doing right now to make myself necessary? How much of myself do I put into my work, my family, my life, myself?

Hope you enjoy the ride and that you find something along the way during this challenge which might touch a heartstring or keep you inspired!

Avatars to follow!

WOW Julie. Thank you so much for starting this inspirational new thread.


"What am I doing right now to make myself necessary? How much of myself do I put into my work, my family, my life, myself?" Your question will take some time to mull through. I've been learning alot about myself lately. Learning that I'm not as forthright as I though I was, I was shutting people out - not being shut out. Living life without emotion - now is that living? So your topic hits very close to home, I'm trying to remember to "finally love yourself" and in doing that I can allow myself to love my DH, my family, my home and my work openly and without conditions. I think alot of us, me included, fear being ourselves and putting our all into everything... fear of hurt... fear of failure ... fear that it's not enough ...

I've been tring to do Tai Chi lately and reading alot about meditation and relaxation. I think this has really helped me to not worry about things that I cannot control. To know in your heart you've done all that you can and its what ever happens "no longer in your hands". Knowing that doing your best IS enough regardless of the result. Though the process of trying to focus on breathing and the process of being ablbe to dismiss thoughts that interfere without over thinking them has made me able to deal with issues more calmly and with less worry and panic. Positive self talk is what it is I guess. I think also knowing that Tai Chi is something that "I" want to do, it's for me and DH is not involved, it is my reward and it is my task (ying and yang).

Whew... I didn't know I was going here.... but it helps to put your thoughts on paper.

I think I'll go change my goals for May while I'm feeling so inspired.

Hugs to all of you chickies.

Thanks for listening.

Good Afternoon Chickies,
Wow, I really appreciate all the feedback from Joy! And truly, I am right where you are too...feeling as though good is not good enough, as if somehow it's not enough...always trying to please everyone...except myself! Your goals for May look wonderful. I am going to steal your idea of putting a star on my calendar for doing the exercise and food and water thing. I wonder, though (and is this self sabbotage?) if I will ever have even ONE day with a sticker? OK...of course I will...I am human and I make mistakes, but I can overcome them, just like anyone else. Today is a new day...a new month!

As I reflect back on the period of time when people were commenting to me about how they thought I had changed and was "finding my wings" so to speak and was really working hard at losing weight, I remember really being present in the moment in preparing myself for the day/week/month. Tuning everything out and really reflecting on who I am! I am seeing that I am not allowing myself to do that in the last few months (mostly due to time constraints, but that's not an excuse) and the feelings of being overwhelmed and out of control have risen to the top.

If I really want to "value myself" then I have to find that place again where I was living in the moment, where I was taking the time for myself that I KNEW I needed to take in order to gt myself to a place where I wanted to be. I know that I have to "let go and let God" take care of me and my needs. It sounds so easy, but I wonder why that is such a hard thing for some of us to do?

So I will put my goals in my signature, for all to see everyday...including myself! I must beleive in myself as much as I beleive in all the outside stimulus in my life! I must get back to what is important...and that's valueing myself as a woman!!!

Hi Everyone... I think I'll try a set up where I number my paragraphs based on my goals and finish up with comments and hoorahs. Hopefully, that way each day I will bring my attention to my goals and keep them first in my focus.
1. Today I shaved my legs (shorts season is here in Vancouver) went for a wonderful walk with DH & the dogs and I plan to go have a bubble bath and paint my toenails after my entries here.
2. Food - granola, plain yoghurt, saskatoon berry jam, two mini bagels with peanut butter and jam. Low fat cranberry bran muffin. Two glasses Coors light, chicken caesar salad with garlic toast. A low fat ice cream sandwich and some popcorn (planned for after the bath) A total of 30 (gestimated on the chicken caesar) I'm allowed 26 but I get "big time" exercise points today -6 points (2.5 hours light intensity walking) so basically I have two left to use yet..... We took the dogs for a long walk (14k = 8.75m) at Hayward lake today... I put down light intensity but there are three pretty challenging hills (the rest is flat). Water was okay today... probably only about 48 oz so far ... but I'm going to have two cups of "sleepy tea" chamomille, peppermint etc... Finally I am journaling here and keeping in touch with the best bunch ... flock ... or brood? of chicks I know.
3. I haven't bought my stars yet, but I do have a sticker of a rose that will work.... hey I put it on now.
4. I am focused on using my calendar this month to plan... both my physical calendar and my yahoo calaendar for lists and reminders. I want to work on my control journal and finances. Must make time to spend 15 minutes on my "zone cleaning" everyday.
5. I re-weeded some areas that were "popping up again" and emptied my weed pail and watered the containers on the deck and the peach trees. Didn't get much further with my "major" weeding but will do some tomorrow night after I mow the lawn... sigh...
6. No progress on the ensuite or master bedroom... gotta buy paint (gotta afford paint).

Well my friend Marj called and I spend an hour talking to her (while in the middle of this post) It was really great to talk to her - it's been a long time. Why do we put our friends on the back burner... for when we have time.... I really need to make my friends a priority. I'm going walking with another friend Lorrie after work tomorrow... I think.... she hasn't confirmed yet but I'm hoping... I haven't known her too long but we kinda "clicked" at work and I would like to keep in touch - she's since moved on to another work site.

I felt kinda proud of myself today : because I talked myself into having the chicken caesar salad (was leaning towards a burger and fries) but while we were walking I did some positive self talk. Saying to myself "I want to eat reasonably for ME, I don't need to feel short changed. I love chicken caesar salads. I want to be successful and proud of what I do.... etc etc. seemed to work.... although I did let a second glass of beer slip in .... we were so thirsty and the water (that I DID ask for) tasted terrible - even with a lemon in it.

I hope you get those new avatars up... I'm kinda tired of being a "B" ... kinds leads to me not thinking positively about myself... Not that I'm trying to be demanding.... I am not even close to computer literate, when I started out here I had no idea what an "avatar" was even.

How did the weekend go for everyone?

Were you able to put on your star Julie?

Well I better go...
Joy

Alright...some of you chickies have some catching up to do! Get in here and post!! Joy and I can chit chat with each other off the group, but we need all of you...so get in here!!! I miss you!!!!

Joy, your post really inspired me! I can see your wonderful self coming out again! YEA!!! 8 miles!!!! I'm so proud of you!

I am feeling lazy again this morning, but I will have some time after I drop of DD and will do a walk, for sure. It's pretty cold here this morning...only about 38 degrees F. But I've walked in colder weather! That nasty word "snow" is in the forecast for today...can't beleive it's MAY!!!

Yesterday was my last day of eating what I wanted and being lazy. That is OLD behavior and is behind me. Today I start with new/old behaviors that I know I am capable of and has proven to be effective to get back in control of eating and exercise! It's for ME...it's a powerful feeling when you say (AND KNOW) what you can do for yourself!!


OK...Question of the day

What is one obstacle which keeps getting in the way of you attaining your goal?

Have fun!

For me that would be a lack of self esteem and a love for sweets.

"I know it is not the end and I can have them once I reach my goal" but ....

"I am on a meal replacment diet!" and count calories, I have learned to treat myself something each day providing it is within calorie range.

Ok, I'm here!

Julie, thanks for setting up this new challenge! I was on my way to post today's question and here you've already posted one!

I'm in the same boat as you. When I do well, I feel in control and everyone notices. But right now, I'm not really in control, and it shows. I need to do this, not for anyone else, but for me. There are so many good things happening in my life right now, and while good, some things are going to make it a lot harder to eat right and exercise. I have to make my weight loss a priority.

I *really* want to be back in Onederland by my birthday, May 29th, and it's perfectly doable.

Today, however, is not a good day to start. I've got a nasty cold, so I'm going to go easy on my body and not exercise today. But that's no reason I can't eat well.

My goals for the month:
1. Get below 200 (about 5 pounds)
2. Drink lots and lots of water (this one will actually be easier with my new job, since I'll be allowed to have beverages at my desk)
3. Strength train 3-4 days per week
4. Exercise 4-5 days per week
5. Eat within calorie budget, and keep track of it!
6. Eat more fruits and veggies
7. Yoga or pilates 3-4 days per week

That's a lot of goals. I can do it. I need to do it. Starting next week I'll actually have more time, and a regular schedule. I think a regular eating schedule is going to help.

To answer the daily question:
The biggest obstacle I keep coming across is other people, in that I seem to have no control over my eating when I am with other people. And it's ridiculous, because everyone who knows me knows I'm trying to lose weight, and supports me. It's just so easy to give in to temptation. However, this is another area where the new job will do me good--I won't be going out to lunch with my friends all the time. I'm sure it'll still happen occasionally, but I'm going to do my best to take a healthy lunch every single day, or at least plan my meals out and make good choices.

Anyway, I've got to get moving. I have to go in for the drug screening that I didn't get to do the other day, among other things. I'll be back this evening to update. Have a great day, chicks!
~Elisha

OK, well I'm a little disappointed today. With myself mostly. I ate poorly.

Not as bad as I could have...here's the low down...but still bad enough!

B-fast: coffee & creamer, 1 cup cottage cheese, 1/2 cup pineapple
Lunch: 4 oz. chicken breast w/ bbq sauce, a piece of nasty cornbread drenched in butter and syrup!
Snack: 2 small pieces dark chocolate (dang that chocolate!) and a Zone bar, 1 cup milk
Supper: 1 & 1/2 cup home made chili, 1 oz. cheddar cheese, 2 T lite Sour cream & a few corn tortilla chips
PM Snack: a couple of handfuls (truly) of popcorn, 1 gas station cappucinno (french vanilla)-16 oz.

Water: so far about 60 oz.

I did 2 miles with Leslie tonight! Oh my...I am so out of shape! Amazing what a couple of weeks will do to ya! My knees hurt so bad! Waaaahhh!

OK for the QOTD...What is one obstacle which keeps getting in the way of you attaining your goal?

For me, that would have to be lack of planning and follow through! I say I will but when it comes right down to it, I don't...and then I beat myself up about how I feel...when it's really only MY fault that I am feeling this way!!!

So for this week anyway, I am going to just try to:
*stay in the moment
*drink my water
*get in exercise when I can
*find one thing about each day that I can be happy with

Elisha...I got a new pedometer...at Walmart and I will put it on tomorrow. I won't be doing as much walking because we have a seminar (for the next 3 days) to learn how to be a better nursing home, but maybe I can get some small walks in on our breaks! Things are sounding very positive in your life. I know you have wanted and worked hard for most of them. Give Steve a big hug from me!!

Welcome Digital Girl...I think the self esteem issue is one that gets in most of our ways!!! Join on in...

Joy...I did not get my star for today because of eating, but there's always tomorrow!

Where are the rest of you??? Please post! I'm feeling deserted here and I miss all of you!!

Hugs,
Julie

Hi Girls!

My one obstacle? Boredom. I have absolutely nothing to do all day but clean and goof off. But lately i have been really good at finding active things to do when I am bored instead of moping around the house. For example: Dancing like a moron while I clean, suddenly jumping up and doing jumping jacks for five minutes, chasing my cat or spining in circles until I get really dizzy. Just to keep my day interesting.

This month my new goal is to exercise every day for at least an hour and a half. I've got the time to do it, so why not? And so far I've been very good. Granted it is only the second day of May, but I think I can do it. As for the Special K diet; we'll see how long I can last on it. I hope to stick it out for two weeks. Last time I tried I failed miserably; but that was before I got used to eating small portions.

Well that be all for now!

My obstacle?? Being a stay at home Mom, with food so readily available to me! Finishing off the last bites of my kids' meals gets me!

***This challenge, I am going to follow my WW plan, drink my water, exercise, and continue with my toning. I am going to take my calcium and my vitamins every day. I'm going to be kind to myself. No excuses.

I'm going to ask the foods that tempt me, " Do I love you enough to wear you??"


You girls are just awesome, and I am proud to be one of you!! I have to cut my post short, because I am so tired, I am brain dead. I'll be back on tomorrow. Joy, I'll get with Julie, and see what we can do for avatars.

My obstacle? BEING ME AND BEING SO WEAK! LOL Hi you all!!! Do you remember me? Can I join you all again?

Donna

Welcome welcome welcome digital girl and welcome back dlzbeth.
Oky doky... Here we go...
1. Today I made arrangements to go for a walk with a friend... but we begged off in fear of gettting wet.... It really wasn't raining that hard.... but we went for Starbucks instead.... only had NF latte & 1/2 of an oatmeal peanut butter bar (yum)
2. Food - I had porridge oats, yoghurt and saskatoon berry jam for breakfast. I had an apple for a snack, then soup and a hogy style beef, cheese and pickle sandwich, a bag of lite popcorn, then the latte & peanut butter bar, about 6 oz of halibut (poached) and curry rice stuffed peppers and brocolli and two tim bits. I'm probably at about 30 points again, but not saved by exercise today as I only put in 30 minutes brisk walking. I did manage to get in at least 64 oz of water today - probably more like 72 if I count my evening sleepy tea.
3. Hmmm - no star for me today 30 points is not on plan unless I do A LOT of exercise. Really gotta cut down. Although before I counted I thought I hadn't done too bad (I only had two tim bits - donut holes)
4. I did put my library due dates in my calendar and worked on setting up lists for zone's one & three. Did get a few groceries and return my overdue library books.
5. No painting. Fun day today (my free day because DH is off and we don't car pool)
6. No weeding. ditto

I think my biggest obstacle is my lack of tenacity. I cave into temptation too easily. I seemed to be on task for a long time and now it is difficult to quite having extra little bits all the time. If I have too many 1 point foods (snacks especially) I still end up being over and maintaining or gaining instead of loosing.

Well - it's 10:50 ... 4am comes early so good night for now.

Joy

We've identified an obstacle, now let's look at the feelings that go along with that obstacle and becoming in that pattern of being "stuck".

What is one feeling you have when you are “stuck”?

Morning chicks! Welcome back, Donna! How is everything going for you?

Sorry I didn't check back in last night. The nasty cold I have just kept getting worse, and as a result, I called in sick today! And I have tomorrow off too, so some serious rest is in order. I just hope I'm perfectly well by the time I start my new job on Monday.

Food yesterday wasn't too bad, mostly because I wasn't really hungry. I still managed to eat lunch at Wendy's with my mom. I didn't eat all my fries though. Mom was having a baked potato and suddenly she threw down her fork and said "That's enough. I'm not hungry, I'm just eating because it's there." I threw down my french fry and said "Yeah, me too." And then we got up and left.

I didn't exercise yesterday (unless you count walking around Lowe's and Pier 1, which I don't because I forgot my pedometer), and the only water I got came in the form of fizzing AlkaSeltzer and Diet Coke. Not the best food for getting healthy. But calories came in around 1500, though since I'm not at home I'm not exactly sure. I do remember that I had 53 calories left in my budget.

So today is going to be a day of rest, and a day of laundry. We may go look at another house this evening if I'm feeling decent.

I keep forgetting to wear my pedometer. I won't get much walking in today or tomorrow anyway. Next week will be the real challenge.

Anyway, I'll stop rambling now. Have a great day, chicks!
~Elisha

Oh, I forgot to answer the question!

What is one feeling you have when you are “stuck”?

Frustration. Anger, mostly at myself. Disappointment, again mostly at myself. Most of all frustration. Out of control. I hate that feeling.