Hi there, ladies. I'm not new to the site, but I have not been keeping up lately. Posting today because I am currently 220lbs, and have been since gaining 60 lbs during my first pregnancy.

Since weaning DS, I have been trying - with a great deal of anxiety - to lose this weight so that we could TTC # 2 (I am 34 and we want at least one more baby, if not more). The more I struggle, the worse I do. The feeling of *having* to lose the weight in order to have another baby is too stressful.

I am otherwise in perfect health. BP is good. I exercise. So DH and I have decided that we want to TTC anyway, despite the excess weight.

Did anyone else do this? Did your Dr. support you? What do you eat while PG if you are overweight?

I would love to get some information - thanks very much in advance.

Well mine wasn't a planned pregnancy but it happened without a hitch My doctor has been very supportive but she did tell me she'd like for me to not gain more than 10-15 pounds. Honestly I've eaten whatever I've wanted, just tried to limit portions. Good luck!

Hello! It sounds like you are in great health. Sounds like you should go for it! There is a lot of good info out there on pregnancy and nutrition. What I tell my ladies is, if you have access to healthy food, walk daily or almost daily, and use common sense, you will be fine. I worry more about my ladies who are extremely underweight going in to the pregnancy and are afraid to gain anything. The "official" guidelines for women who are overweight are to limit weight gain to 10-15 lbs. There is absolutely no science behind this that I have found and it is just a way that medicine tries to control women's bodies, IMO. My philosophy is, use common sense. You will gain what you need to gain. Eat healthy. We all know what that is. Whole grains, lean meats, low fat dairy (if you can tolerate dairy), fruits and veggies (the fresher the better). Exercise daily. And find an OB provider who is supportive of YOU and knowledgeable and respectful. (Maybe that is your doc already, but I am constantly amazed at what women tolerate from their HCPs). I would be more concerned at the possible decrease of fertility for you the longer you wait than I am about your current weight.

I take care of women of a variety of weights and weight gains, and you know what? Some may have gestational diabetes or preeclampsia or shoulder dystocias or c-sections but that goes ACROSS the board, and for the vast vast majority, they have healthy pregnancies, gorgeous babies, and then attack weight loss afterwards with common sense principles, exercise, breastfeeding (usually and hopefully!).

Check with your neighborhood midwife for info personalized for you!

Jen

I didn't plan my pregnancy but I was very heavy prior to getting prego. I weighed 258. Once I was pregnant, I was really commited to watching what I ate and making sure no junk food went to the baby. I only gained 16 pounds while pregnant, no complications. I had a midwife not a doctor and she said once to try and not gain to much but since I wasn't and all my test were always good I never heard anything about it. I walked a lot and was pretty fit so my delivery was easy, less than 4 ours.

I say if you are in good health, go for it. Then you can lose the weight after.

My only regret was since I was bigger, I never got the big pregnant tummy that stuck out, I just looked fatter. I took a few pictures really pushing my stomach out to fake the look but I never had it Put that is pure vanity not a health problem.

I can't tell you how wonderful it has been to read all of these replies. Thank you everyone for taking the time to post.

Jen - I got very emotional when I read your post. I found it so encouraging and understanding. I feel so "un-supported" right now, at this weight and in a new town without any resources. There were so many wonderful resources in NYC - such as the now-defunct Elizabeth Seton Center, where I hung out for much of my pregnancy for classes, support groups etc.

I also had a wonderful and supportive doctor and doula for my first pregnancy, but we have sinced moved to Long Island and the Dr.s I have met with so far seem hostile to doulas and midwives and pretty much anything else that goes beyond the borders of conservative medicine. It has been quite depressing.

I actually would love to use a midwife this time around, but based on my first pregnancy, which was fairly harrowing for many reasons, it's probably prudent to have a bit more medical intervention at my disposal for the next pregnancy. Ideal would be a labor support doula who would work with a wonderful, progressive doctor. That is what I had last time, so I am holding out hope this time. I have asked a local doula to assist me in finding the right practitioner.

But your post was wonderful and I plan to keep it handy for encouragement. You must be a wonderful midwife! Wish you lived here....

Thanks again.

It never occurred to me to ask permission to get pregnant!

True health is about so much more than weight. And health during pregnancy has plenty to do with attitude, yours & your doctor's both. I'll just sit here & agree with Jen insofar as finding a supportive doctor and ignoring stupid guidelines about what you "should" gain.

Also, take heart that a rough first pregnancy does not guarantee problems with latter pregnancies. Unless your problems were related to preexisting issues (uterine malformation, fibroids, heart problems you had before getting pregnant), there is little chance they will reoccur. Issues like preeclampsia in particular are typically first-time problems only, and even hyperemesis often doesn't reoccur. (I had both those problems in my first pregnancy only.)

If you know what you want and can be secure in yourself, you can work with even the most conservative doctor (says the woman who got into an argument with an OB during her first labor). They can't make you take any tests or have any interventions (up to & including induction) you don't agree to. But they don't always make it easy. I had one OB my first pregnancy say she'd have "made" me take the AFP if she'd seen me during the window, and another one argued with me for a good 10 minutes over the GTT last time. (I realize I have a lot fewer tests than most women these days.)

If you truly want the backup, you can also look for a midwife with OB backup, that way you can be seen by a doctor if you need more medical help.

Thanks, monster mom! It's really not a question of asking permission - it's a question of working with someone who is not going to make me feel as though I "should" have waited to get PG until I lost weight. Of course, if I can't find someone, I'll deal. But it would be great to be supported.

Thanks again.

I tried to lose the weight before TTC, but a year later I was the same weight. I basically just told my dr that DH and I were ready, and since I exercised regularly and had no problems at all with BP, I thought I should go ahead. She wrote up a script for prenatals and told me to start trying in 3 cycles! My OB also gave me the 10-15 lb goal which I totally agree with and hope to accomplish. As long as the baby is healthy, that is my goal. I don't want to deliver this baby and still have an extra 40 lbs to lose, in addition to the fat I already have. I'm going to eat healthy and exercise when I can, and hopefully make that 10-15 lb goal.

That's great, haut bois - congratulations on your pregnancy.

I just wanted to add another story for you to read. I was really, really overweight when I got pregnant and my doctors didn't even really mention it during the pregnancy. The only thing different that happened is they tested me for gestational diabetes earlier than normal and just to be on the safe side I followed that diet throughout my pregnancy. They told me that it would be ok if I didn't gain any weight during since I was changing my eating habits to be healthier...just not to lose any. I gained 35 pounds or so...but it was twins (who I carried to almost 39 weeks ) so it was ok. I lost all but 5 of those pounds by the time I left the hospital. I didn't have any problems with the pregnancy related to my weight at all. Good Luck!

I'm relieved to hear that being overweight isn't as big a problem as I have been thinking it is.. Now I'm freaking out about my biological clock ticking away.. I'm 33 and thinking that my time is coming to an end soon..

DH and I are planning on TTC by the end of the year.. I want to lose SOME of the extra weight and get health insurance in line before that time comes.. As you can see by my siggie weight-tracker, I've got a long way to go !!

Steph

Greetins! I feel kind of late posting in here, but I just starting visiting the forums.

Anyhoo, with my first pregnancy, I gained 60 pounds. It caused alot of health problems, during and afterwards. With my second, I lost 30 pounds during the pregnancy (and gained it all back after a post-natal gallbladder surgery ). My doctor has given me a 'strict' no dieting rule this time and told me to gain 10-15 pounds...but if my changed eating habits facilitate losing weight, she won't argue with that. What did I eat the last two times...? Not much. Couldn't keep it down. Alot of apples and mac and cheese.

If you're eating well, staying fit, and baby is growing, gaining/losing/maintaining your weight shouldn't be an issue. And your prepregnancy weight will impact how you fare during the pregnancy inasmuch as it impacts everything else. It might be harder for someone who is overweight to carry 7.5 pounds of baby in their belly than someone who is in 'ideal' condition. You will also be more susceptible to preecclampsia (high blood pressure), circulatory problems and pregnancy induced diabetes, all of which can be controlled by adequate exercise and a good diet. Good luck TTC to everyone who is trying.

PS Droffnyl : you're not the only one with a long way to go!

Now I'm really getting scared. I'm 5 months along and have gained 25 pounds already. EEP! She assured me it's not twins. Just must be one big baby. Looks like I'm carrying around a basketball.