Okay here's the latest chapter in this soap opera. My husband had his dr's appt yesterday and she recommended that he stop the Wellbutrin because the side effects of dizziness/facial numbness were not really going away. Also in the time that he's been on it there's been no improvement at all even though it takes a few weeks for the med to completely kick in there is usually some kind of indication that it is starting to do something. So now he is starting this med called Remeron or also called Mirtazapine. Has anyone taken this one? The dr had talked to psychiatrist about him (not using his name of course) and the other dr said to stop the Wellbutrin and recommended this other med. So I guess we'll see what happens with this one. From the info I have seen on the Internet it starts to work in 2 weeks so I'm hoping that it kicks in soon.

I took Remeron for a day, so I'm not exactly sure how it works, but when I found out that a side effect is weight gain I did some research on it. I saw somewhere that it was antipsychotic, but I can't seem to find where I saw that now, so it may have been incorrect or it's changed. I was only 15 when I took it and it's not approved for teenagers, but it may have had a negative effect on me just in the one day. I had been depressed for a while, but that night I attempted suicide. I had been considering it for quite some time, so I don't know if the medicine just gave me the push to do it or if I just decided that I wanted to get on with it. The psychiatrist said it that it had never really had that effect on many people at all and that it was more than likely just me, not the medication. So apparently that is very unlilkely to happen.
The only really negative side effect I've seen in information about it is weight gain.

Most antidepressants or other mood altering meds take more than one dose to be effective so I think I'd have to go with your dr on this one but who knows, maybe you had some kind of hypersensitivity to it and then also because as you said it is not approved for teens.

Well yesterday was pretty horriffic. My son and I ended up sleeping til after lunch, me because I worked a night shift the night before and him because he was sick. When I got up I found that my husband had started doing some work outside and for some reason decided to tackle a project that really needed 2 people and so he's all po'd that it's taking so long. So when I go outside to talk to him he's yelling and me and being nasty so I just turned around and came back in the house. Then he comes in a bit later and says if I don't come out he's going to start smashing something. So I go out and the project is finished in about 10 minutes. After that I tried to just keep myself and our son out of his way. Then he starts doing something with his truck which takes hours and he's coming in and out of the house and having a fit all the time because I think he's not as at fixing things as he seems to think he is. Anyway he did end up ripping the screen door off the back deck entrance and then he did smash his watch, looked like he took the hammer to it. After he finished cleaning up all his stuff outside he went to the basement and stayed there until we went upstairs for our son to go to bed then he came up to watch tv in the living room. I ended up going out and getting some snacks and a DVD (a funny one) and I pigged out on chips and dip. He was okay this morning, he's already out and gone spending the day with some buddies at the race track. The stupid thing is that he's not likely to get all po'd with them as he does at home. Like he saves it for here or something. The anger on him is so palpable sometimes, it is like being hit with it even though he's not touching me. I'm praying these meds start doing something soon. I was half joking to the dr about getting some Valium, I think I'm going to need some soon.

Hey everyone. Just thought I would update. Things are so-so. This past week hasn't been too bad, hubby has had some flare-ups but generally overall things have been not too bad. Yesterday was pretty good, today not so great. I think the meds are slowly starting to work, hopefully by the end of the weeks things will be back to normal. I know that it is not easy for him, I'm certain that he doesn't want to feel this way but it's been difficult on me and our son as well. I think our little boy is scared of his daddy now as he goes all to pieces whenever my husband says anything in a loud or stern voice and also he gets upset when I have to leave for work. Tonight was really, really bad and my husband was not lifting a finger to try and comfort our son. So of course I was really po'd about that and when I phoned home like an hour later things didn't sound any better. Well I'm trying to stay hopeful that things are going to improve soon.

Jen, you have the patience of a saint! I don't think I could cope as well as you do, the stress and worry must be so draining.......I'd probably lose my temper, tell him to stop behaving like a 2 year old and kick his butt!

Being ill is one thing, but purposely mistreating the person who helps you and cares the most is inexcusable.....and frightening your own child?...

I hope you have a good week!

Last night was absolutely the worst, I thought he was going to get violent with me but he took it out on his computer instead. He was trying to fight with me in front of our son who I think is scared of his father now. I have to go to work tomorrow night and I am dreading it now thinking what kind of a fit my son is going to have when I have to leave. He has a dr's appt today, he doesn't want to go because he would have to leave work early and he's so behind there and actually wants to stay and work late. Heck he wanted to leave here at 3am after he was fighting with his computer here at home and go to work but I managed to convince him he needed to sleep a few hours at least. I honestly don't know what to do, I"m at my wits end. All I know is that we can't go on like this. He was saying last night that he wishes there was a painless way to kill himself so that this would be over. Also he thinks that I don't care about him anymore and that I am screwing around on him (both of which are not true). We haven't had talks about this stuff in ages but it all seems to be coming back now. Since he won't go to the appt I'm going to go and talk to the dr myself about what is going on because I'm right at my limit of coping and I'm afraid what this is doing to our son. Like I"m at the point where I am ready to pack a bag and get us the heck out of here. I'm not going to do it but it is very tempting to just get away from all the problems and I start thinking how nice it would be if I didn't have to cope with his problems anymore. It gets to the point where you just want it to go away and you don't care how that is achieved.

anyway, thanks for letting me vent.

Jen,

You really got a full plate lady. I'm very very sorry to hear about this.
I'm glad that you are putting your Son first and making sure he is not emotionally scared from all this. Your a good Mom.

Anytime you want to talk you just come here sweetie.

HUGS !!!

Jen:

Is there a way you could take your son to someone's house for the evening (saying its a "sleep-over"?)....it might be a temporary fix for your worry when you work.

Ask for help from family, or a trusted friend? Girlfriend, this will wear out down quicker than the flu.....

Unfortunately I don't have many close friends or relatives where we live. The closest person that I could have him stay overnight is over an hour away. He hasn't been away from us overnight in awhile, actually we were away one night when he was just over a year old and since then we've had babysitters occassionally but never overnight.

I went to see our dr and talked about what is going on. She suggested he go back on the Paxil or try a different med called Effexor (I think that is how it is spelled or something similar) and also she is going to get him a pysch consult. She gave me a prescription for Clonazepam which is for agitation, anxiety. It is fast acting, not something you have to take daily for awhile to start working, you can take it as needed. So I have to talk to him and see what he wants to do, I hope he is in a better mood when I talk to him next.

Jen - along with everything else - please realize that coming off of meds (Wellbutrin) and going on another one (Remeron) can cause violent reactions, mood swings, etc etc etc

Your husband really needs to keep his doctors appointments while he is coming off of some med and starting another.

Did he just go cold turkey off the Wellbutrin or are they weaning him off it slowly? also I have known people to have severe reactions to new meds - he could be having a problem with the new Remeron.

Please just be aware that all of these meds are messing with brain chemicals and can cause reactions. (I am not anti meds I have just learned from experience and talking with many others that meds can have dramatic affects on some).

If your husband will not go to the doctor, you are wise to go and tell them what is going on.

Cathy

Thanks for your concerns Cathy. The dr is starting him on pretty low doses and always, always weans him off of one med before starting another one. Like the Paxil he was up to 2 tabs and weaned off over about 2-3 weeks down to half a tab and then stopped. The Wellbutrin he was only taking one tab for about 2 weeks, was supposed to go up to 2 tabs after the first week but he was so dizzy all the time that she said not to increase to 2 tabs and since it was a low dose and he was starting a low dose of the Remeron she said it was okay to start right away and the pharmacist said the same thing. right now he is fit to be tied about what is going on and I can't say that I blame him. I think what is really tough is that things were going so well with the Paxil, other than the sexual side effects, and now his moods are all over the map and he is feeling like crap. It can't be a lot of fun feeling like he does, that is about the only reason that I am hanging in here, I know what once he gets into the right med things will be fine again. I almost wonder if it would be a better idea just to wean him of the Remeron and not take anything at all for a few weeks, let everything get out of his system. Maybe that would be the best thing and then when it's been a month or so with no drugs maybe he can be better assessed because some of what is going on could be because of jumping between all these meds even though they are low doses and he hasn't been taking them for very long.

Jen, I don't know how old your son is, but you might consider telling work that you need to work a shorter shift until things *even out* with your husband's mood swings and delusions that you are "cheating"....(when would you have the energy to start a social affair?)

and even though you are supportive towards your husband, if you feel physical violence is emmient.....DONT TAKE IT....GO somewhere safe with your son....he doesn't need to see it, you shouldn't become injured physically on top of the mental anguish. I'm not being judgemental towards your husband, you know HE knows he is irrational and doesn't want to be, but you've got to think of the big picture too.

(consider making a small "safety" flight bag and hide it in your car....a set of clothes, fresh jammies, some snacks, comfort toys and enough $$$ for a hotel & essentials). Yeah, this might seem extreme, but better safe than sorry.

I knew someone from work who took Effexor and she was always sleepy and hungry....but calm.....

I wish I could do something about work but it just isn't possible. I am a RN working shifts at a hospital. I just isn't possible to work less hours or shorter shifts. Believe me, there is no way I could do that. Yeah I wish I knew when I had the time or energy to be seeing someone on the side'!

We've talked about his violence before and he knows that if he hit me or our son that would be it, I'd be out the door and not coming back and stopping at the police station on my way to press assault charges. I'm not scared of him that I would just sit by and let him abuse us like that. He hit me once, a really long time ago and I told him then that I wouldn't put up with it again, that I would leave him in 2 seconds if it ever happened again and it has never since. Even the dr asked me that today if I was afraid of him being violent towards us and I said no and if he did that I would leave. I'm not afraid of leaving him and having to go it alone, in someways it would almost be better.

Anyway he came home in a not great mood, I haven't had a chance to talk to him about what the dr said. I got him to take a Clonazepam right away. The pharmacist said it would be a good idea to get him to take one in the evening so he would know if it make him really drowsy in case he needs to take one during the day. He's upstairs talking on the phone right now and seems to be in a good mood so let's hope it lasts the rest of the evening.

A claim was recently filed about Remeron. I got a letter about it since I had taken before. I haven't read it through yet, so I don't know what it's about, but I believe the website is remeronsettlement.com if you'd like to check it out. I don't know if they've found something wrong with it or what, but I thought I'd let ya know.