I am having to repeat that to myself a lot right now. I will NOT give up! I have just gotten started here in the last few weeks, and am working on getting my own plan together for losing. I wish so much I could just go on some program and lose the weight, but my past experiences with weight have shown me that that puts too much pressure on me. I am really trying to believe in me and find my own way. Anyhow, I am also experimenting with how often to weigh myself. So I haven't weighed myself in three weeks. Last time I weighed I was down seven pounds, and happy because I was at the lowest weight I had been at in awhile. So, yesterday I weighed myself, and I gained FOUR pounds! I was so upset, I cried most of the day . I have been trying so hard for a long time now, and had finally felt like I got a good start, and then GAINED! I can't figure out if I really gained that much, or possibly it is water weight or what. I did have Thanksgiving and have eaten a little more maybe recently---stress eating, but man, what a discouragement. I felt really down on myself and felt SO MUCH like I just can't do it. And I am just trying to still get started .

But I CANNOT and WILL NOT give up! I felt like I am so messed up with the eating issues and stuff that I just am not going to be able to do this. It baffles me how I can see other people succeeding, but do not really think I am going to be successful. It doesn't make any sense. I kind of have a picture of how it would feel to eat less and be successful, but I lose track of it. I called my sister for support. She came from the same environment---a mom who was obsessed with weight and eating, and she lost weight with her own little plan, and has kept it off for a long time. If she can do it, I MUST be able to! Oh man, I am starting to cry again. I need to find a way to be kind to me and encourage and coach myself so I can be successful. I just needed to let you guys know where I am with all this today. Has anyone felt this way? How did you succeed in spite of it? I am sorry this is not a very encouraging post---but I AM very persistent, so I guess I have that going for me. Because I really felt like giving up, but I am not going to!

I honestly think we have all been where you are!! I know I have and I still go there from time to time. Keep giving yourself pep talks and STAY with your plan!! Your on your way to being healthy that is what is important and your weight will come off. Don't worry if it's not as fast as eveyone else. Focus on the lifestyle change and know in your heart your going to stick with it. I weight myself everyday. Today my scale played a nasty trick on me. It said I weight 214 I was like yes!! Then it said error...(and I swear I heard it giggle) then I got back on and it said 217lbs. Well last weight in I was 115. Does this mean I gain 2lbs (maybe) or it might be the effects of my workout. Either way I know my scale doesn't say 239 (my start weight) I know I have and will mess up and I forgive myself for that and move on trying to be as healthy as possible. Your going to do it! Forgive yourself and keep going!!

My weight constantly goes up and down. I've finally hit virgin fat territory this week after wobbling between 259 and 265.5 for probably 2 months.

I think you are doing great. I know you said you are coming up with your own plan, but maybe if you post what you are doing you someone may have some tips to help you tweak it.

Also have you been taking your measurements. You may have gained 4 pounds but lost 10 inches? If you are working out you could be building muscle.

Just keep hanging in there. The scale will move again.

My favorit tool for losing weight is my diet diary. Once a week I record what I weigh and every day I write down what I have for every meal and how many cals it comes to. At the end of each day I add it all up and I can see exactly what I'm doing.This allows me to stay in control and believe me it works. I've lost over 50lbs sence Aug.

Kathy,

It is totally ok ti feel the way that you are feeling right now. Everyone has gone through it at one time or another. I am personally going through the exact same thing. I have been struggling with losing 10 pounds forever. One week, i will give it my all and lose 2,3, or even 4 pounds, and then i turn around and slack off the second week and gain it back. Its a vicious cycle that only we have control over. But don't cry about it, everythings going to be alright You will succeed and so will I. Weightloss is a long and agonizing journey that we all can conquer if we just put our minds to it.

So on those days that you feel like giving up just push a little harder.I come find inspirational thoughts on the net and try to incorperate them into my daily thoughts. And my inspirational thought for this week is:Losing weight needs to become more important than food. Kathy i know that you can do it

I my self started my own plan with the help of a dietician. She told me to eat about 1500 calories to start and she gave me a food guide, which breaks down by calorie intake into breakfast, snack, lunch,snack, and dinner. I seems to be working pretty well. I have the same problem with weighinh my self like everyday and i have come to learn that it is not good. I think i am going to start weighing myself once a month. Because when i weigh myself once a week, i see progress and then i start to slip back into my old habits.

Well good luck to you Kathy and keep us posted

Kathy, Way to go!! You can do this. I tell myself that everyday, especially when I am tempted or don't do particularly well. And, there are truly days that I don't do well. I am not the least bit perfect. It is so discouraging to have a gain. You are strong, you did not give up. You posted here instead. That in itself shows that you are using tools to help you be successful. *hug*

Kathy- I know how you feel. Just keep at it, you'll find the right balance- sometimes it just takes more trial and error! You know it's worth it and we are here for you

It can be hard to overcome something like this when we've grown up around it- good for your sister, but you're your own person and you can do it too! Don't let your past discourage you from what your future holds

Kathy, please don't get discouraged. You CAN do it! This journey has so many ups and downs so you'll have to get used to nasty surprises on the scale. You'll have pleasant ones too, believe me! Our bodies do seem to fight the efforts we're making at times. I've experienced 12-14 week plateaus where I did everything right, yet the scale wouldn't budge. It all works out eventually, even if it takes longer that you'd hoped (I'm 2-1/2 years in and that elusive goal is still 20lbs. or so away). But, you keep at it and do your best to move forward and keep the backward slides few and far between. Have a good cry to vent the frustration, then carry on honey, carry on!

Thank you so much, everyone. Your support means more to me than you probably know. Thank you so much for the kind words. I think the worst part was how down I got on myself---so easy to do, but not good. Not good at all. I am hoping to learn to show myself kindness through this weight loss journey. I had today to regroup, and it is still hard, but I am doing pretty well today (eating well), so that is good. I know taking it one day at a time will help, too. I am rethinking maybe having more structure to my plan...I'll keep you posted. Thank you all so much.

Kathy,

We have all felt the way you do. Even now, after having a great month being on plan, the scale isn't moving. Its depressing, it's difficult but we are made of stronger stuff around here and so are you! The scale may have won one battle, but if you keeping going, you WILL win the war! When things slow down or stop for me, I use this to keep me going. Think of your weight loss as a long, heavy freight train pulled by one of those huge steam engines that has been running down hill, out of conrol. Before that train can back up, it first has to slow down and then stop. That takes time. You might not feel your backing up, but you are slowing down your train, and that's a big accomplishment in itself. It also takes time for that steam engine (your matabolism) to heat up and start producing the fuel it takes to move that train. Things will happen if you just keep on keeping on! You can do this, I can do this, we can do this! The power is in our hands! When you feel like nothing is happening, go for a walk, pop in a tape, just turn on the radio and dance! Keeping yourself active can break the blues and it's great for your body!

Good luck Kathy. We are all with you. It's a battle we will win together!