Meg said: <<It may be though, that the restrained behavior comes more naturally to normal weight people. I'm convinced that their brains are wired differently when it comes to food. >>
I also dont like the term 'chronic r. e.' Tho the meaning of the word chronic means 'over time'. But I still dont like it. I guess it doesnt matter what its called as long as we do it.
When I first started thinking about controling my weight years ago, I decided first I had to figure out what made me 'eat that way' instead of losing the weight then 'eating that way' again, and gaining it all back. I had done that before and didnt like it. And that is what I did. It took several years of learning, reading, thought, and deep, honest self examination, as well as buckets of tears. Time well spent. It changed my life in the best way possible and brought be peace and joy even while fat. I now know why my eating was out of control some times, and the mechanics behind it. And these behaviors indeed are vasty improved.
But... when there is something I want to eat very badly, I still want more of it than natural eaters do. I can tell.

And food is still more important in my life than theirs. And it always will be. Yes, I am much better and havent binged outright for years, and I rarely overeat anymore. And can even have chocolate in my house without eating it - I have it here now, for months in fact. (cake would be another story, LOL) But I still have food 'issues' and always will.
As a child I learned to comfort myself with food, I learned to suppress negative feelings such as sadness and anger with food. I celebrated with food, grieved with food, and thought about food 24/7. I learned to eat when I wasnt physically hungry as well as to eat the wrong things with gusto. Food was love in my family. It was how we interacted. The only thing that would totally erradicate this entrenched personal food history -that will always influence my food relationship- would be a lobotomy. Not my idea of acceptable wls.
Although I thankfully have many of my obsessions and compulsivities understood as well as vasty reduced, when you have travelled the wrong pathway (eating habits) for your whole life, when it was the first way you learned, and you have lived it for decades, I believe the tendency for dysfunctional eating simply does not totally ever go away no matter what you do. That of course is my opinion, and what I have seen in myself. We can learn new functional ways of thinking about, and loving ourselves, new ways of eating and exercising, and learn to have deserved joy in our lives, but it will always be there lurking, just like the inate instinct in tamed wild animals. Ask sigfried and roy.
We can form new habits, and even make these our first line of action so that old habits are difficult to bring out, but they are still there lurking, in my opinion, simply because the old pathways in the brain are still there too, and always will be. They say you never forget how to ride a bike. Its the same thing. That information is in the brain too and cant be lost, as is historic erratic eating. But then, so are our new, better habits there too. And the longer, more consistently we do them to ingrain them, the more likely they will be our first line of action when around food/eating. And over time should get even better.
I do not in any way imply that this means we all will revert to old behavior, and regain our weight again, we wont, just that from what I have come to believe, it will take constant vigilence and attention. Not 24/7 necessarily, but especially during those times that we are vulnerable, when our life isnt going as well as we would like, when we are tired or irritated, when we pass that chocolate cake and someone hands us a gooey piece, etc. It will NEVER be as easy for us as those who never had a problem, but then we now know more about our mechanism than those who have never had to work on it.
Stronger in the broken places, Jan.