This is a thread for singles who need support in a world that seems to be filled with couples.

To borrower from LA: This is not to say that married people are not welcome. I'm hoping this will provide support, friendship and most of all a sense of belonging for single people trying to make it in a "happy couple" world

I am 34 and living outside of Boston. I'm new to my area and having a hard time making friends and getting into a routine that will help me lose weight. Loneliness and weight loss don't go together very well.

Welcome to all!

Yeah! A new home!!!

I've lost a grand total of 4 pounds in the last 2 weeks!! WOOHOO!!! Yeah me!!!! I'm now down 10.5 over my highest weight of 205 (January).

My roommate won a VIP party at a local club at the end of the month and I'm almost dreading it. I don't like to dance unless I've consumed a large quantity of alcohol and on my diet I don't have enough calories to get me to that "happy" state. I know she wants me to go and it would be good for me to get out, but I just don't know if I can face the club scene.

I can't tell you the last time I went to an actual CLUB, the few times I do go out it is more of a bar/hangout than a dance club. I have almost 2 weeks before the party so I can loose another 4-5 pounds which will help with the self confidance, but what's a girl to do???

hey singles! i found you! i think this is a much better place to be. i just thought i'd check in between jobs. for anyone checking us out, i am single, 38, and no people children. i have my baby girl, molly, a lab/shepard of 11 years. i own my own home in corning, ny and work a lot to avoid being alone all the time.

iwmft2-congrats on those lost lbs, gone into the universe 4ever!!! as far as going out, go 4 it! let your hair down! if it were me i would try to drink something like rum and diet soda! that won't do too much damage. stay away from the sweet and pre-mixed (ex. white russians, dacquiris, etc), and beer because of the sugar in it. yes, beer has got maltose in it, a form of sugar, hence the "beer belly" for big beer drinkers. i just read that last tidbit a week ago. i can't advise on the confidence thing, because i am not good in that department but good luck and most of all have fun!!!!

shyangel - thanks for moving us!

btw - i am having one of those binge days, that i have to nip in the bud. had a blt sub for lunch with a new m-azing candy bar for a kicker. of course, the girls at the store had to show me the new product and i just had to try it. no willpower what so ever!

well, have to get ready for 2nd round of work! i will check back tonite!
kathy

IWMFT - 4 pounds in two weeks is super. You are doing great and losing at a good rate. I wish I was doing so well. You should be proud of yourself for what you have accomplished so far. I also think that you should go to the party. I would also say to try and have a good time without a lot of alcohol. I can totally understand where you are coming from, but you don't need the calories and you don't need to hide behind the alcohol. You deserve to have a good time - just worry about that and not the strangers in the club. Go for yourself and your friend (who I'm sure doesn't care what you weigh). Keep us updated and good luck losing more before the party - every pound counts.

Kathy - if they sold willpower then I would be dirt poor and someone would be very rich. I hope you can make good choices at dinner time. You needn't have a totally 'bad' day just because of one meal. Hmmm...maybe I should take my own advice.

Have great evenings everyone.

Hello people, I've found you over here and I pasted in a link on the old thread so people could jump over easily. Well, I got to the gym again yesterday. Just did some back (I work out with heavy weights, am in a gym full of competing bodybuilders, a lot of them friends from way back). I've never gone into a contest because I could never get the fat off. My training is top level though (at least among women here).

I was going to call it quits after the weights because my foot hurts from too much walking/running/prancing barefoot to the Cindy Crawford tape! but I decided to ride a bike instead. Found one of those spin type ones and gave it 15 mins. Not bad. Really worked up a sweat.

Walked home and ate too much. Bad planning, nothing with me, a string of about 8 conveniences stores on the way home and then last one caught me with a Snickers bar! Darn. Tallied up the calories and found I probably was close to 3,000 for the day and I thought I'd been good. The exercise is preventing gains but I want to lose. No way at that rate!

Ok, nuff of me there. Have I bored you all totally?

I see some new names, well, one, actually, FairyTale, hello! Great going on the 4 lb loss. I totally understand your alcohol/calorie dilemma. I am the same way, am not going to get out on the floor and shake my booty without mega amounts of Dutch courage flowing through my veins, but those mega amounts are keeping me from losing weight. Here in Japan, drinking is a major social event. Even if you don't drink you go out and eat. But for me, going out means I start knocking back the mugs of beer. I just don't stop when I'm having a good time. So I try not to go out too much but there's the dilemma. No going out, no fun, no socializing. I'm trying to cut back on the unfun times out and just try to talk more instead of waiting for the alcohol to take over and run my mouth. (Right now caffeine is running it!)

corning -- have you nipped that binge?! what's the amazing candy bar? no, I shouldn't ask. I read about the maltose in the beer. I've got to switch to something else as beer has been my drink of choice for years now. I used to drink a type of Japanese vodka called shochu mixed with water and lemon or grapefruit. If you have it made with fresh lemon or grapefruit (you squeeze it right there at your table) it's great, vitamin C, lots of water and not much alcohol. I think I should switch to that when I go out for a session. Thanks for the reminder, beer belly, beer gut, well I don't have one now but I did. Yuck!!

shyangel -- How are you? Thanks for making this new thread!

hey everyone! well, it's a little past pumpkin hour! nothing to do, tv is boring, already caught up on the soap. i tape it everyday and that is the first thing i do when i get home. oprah has been all repeats, so no catching up there.

red balloon - that is the name "m-azing", it is a new m&m bar, in 2 flavors. i've never heard of that vodka. when i was a younger vodka drinker it was always the cheap stuff. too poor for anything else. now i might have absolut in a white russian now and then. i don't drink much anymore, but i do love those white russians. the only problem is they taste like a milkshake and can sneak up on you fast. i also wanted to add i have that cindy crawford tape. it might be old but it has always been a favorite. now that you mentioned it i might have to dust it off. i just got core secrets today. i have a bad back and physical therapist said something like that would be good for me to stablize my back. i will give an update after i try it.

can someone tell me how to get to the other smilies besides the one to the left. i click on more and nothing happens????

well, tomorrow is a new day to start fresh. i'm glad this bad binge day is over. i'm going to hit the hay and think new in the morning. nite!!!
kathy

corning, when you click on more on the smilies make sure you have your screen reduced. The other smilies pop up in another small window so that window may be hidden. If not, I can send you the codes by pm or the actual file by email if you like. Let me know.

by the way, shochu isn't vodka, I just meant it was like vodka. It's usually made from rice. There are also kinds made from wheat and potato. So, it's like distilled sake.

gotta run. had another great workout at the gym. the cc tape was her second one. do you have that too? i also have the first one which I really like too. The second one is tough!

Redballoon - thanks for putting in the link so it is easier for people to find us here. Sounds like you have a great workout program. I wish I had someone to lift weights with to learn the right way and have the incentive and motivation to actually do it. I have dumbbells at home but can't even look at them let alone pick them up. Sometimes I just don't know what is wrong with me.

Can you pick one aspect of your eating to try and modify to help you bring down your calories? For instance, I evaluated breakfast for myself and came up with some healthy options. I also decided to add in a protein bar/snack at about 4:30pm so I am not so hungry at dinner and have less of a risk of overeating. With your muscles and exercise you should be able to reap the rewards of weight loss too.

Kathy - how is your new day going? Do you have any idea what caused your binge yesterday?

I made it to my track workout last night and in total ran about 4 miles. I know that if I could just keep up regular running and maybe some biking (4 days a week - but it's tough) I would lose weight. If I could add in the weights just think what I could do. Why do we consciously make choices that are not good for us? Sometimes life is just too frustrating. Tonight I'm going to work on my farm and hopefully get a little activity in even though I should run instead. Oh well, need and want to pick veggies and don't have enough sunlight to do everything.

Hello again! Sorry I haven't been around lately.

Thank you to shyangel for starting this thread here and to redballoon for linking it to the other thread so I could find my way here (I still don't know the site very well so I wasn't sure where to look!).

To recap, my name is Sheri, I am a single/never married woman, age 51, who lives in the Washington, DC area. After a lifetime of dieting (yo-yoing up and down in weight), I began eating healthy and exercising regularly on July 1 last year. I have lost 35 pounds, lowered my cholesterol substantially, and better managed my blood pressure.

I am about halfway to my weight loss goal, though I am not certain what my goal will be because I haven't been thin in three decades! I figure I have about another 35 pounds to lose. I no longer believe that diets are the answer (in fact the word isn't even in my vocabulary anymore) and it is my goal to eat healthy (the majority of the time) for the rest of my life.

hey singles! hi sheriva! nice of you to come back! you are doing so well. 35 lbs is a wonderful start. my question is how did you get yourself in to the right frame of mind? i'm always "dieting"

red balloon - i know what sake is ,though i've never tried it. somehow i got to that page of smilies last nite after i wrote that message. i probably couldn't do it again. i printed it out so i always have a copy in front of me. thanks for the help and the pm. i think i must have the 1st cc video because it's not that hard. one of the things i liked about it was the music.

shyangel - i am having a better day today. i don't know what really set that off . lack of willpower maybe. the veggies are as important as running for your health. they can't go to waste. i miss having a big garden with squash and cherry tomatoes. i am trying a couple of tomotoe plants, but i might have planted them too late.

sounds like we all had a very active day which is great for us. i went for my 20 minute dog walk, did a few minutes each on the lateral thigh trainer and hula hoop, then i did my new core secrets fundamental video. that was about a 1/2 hour just teaching the basics, but boy do i feel the after effects now. it's a sore but good kind of feeling. tomorrow i work both jobs (tues & thurs), so it is hard those days. not much time. weather permitting i try to at least get in the dog walk in between. it is good for her and it gives me a little energy to go to the 2nd job.

well, i am getting tired. have a great day!
kathy

p.s. i just love all those smilies, i hope they are working. tee hee!!

Hello all. I see we have some more new names (new to me, that is) here and action seems to be picking up. Well, I'm back from yet another good workout. Did shoulders and arms and then, though I was going to call it quits, got on the spin bike for 15" and worked up a nice sweat that must have been good for something. Now I'm home and made a big salad and have eaten that. One of my four cats is trying to walk on the keyboard. Her name is Nozomi, which means hope or desire because when I found her starving I figured that is all she had and that is what kept her going enough to have let me find her. She's all black with a tail. (two of mine don't have tails. I guess they're what you'd call Japanese bobtails!)

shyangel -- You're right, it is so great that I have people around me lifting weights. And though I work out at a Gold's gym now it's filled with people from a hardcore bodybuilding gym that they bought out and all those members got free Gold's memberships. It makes all the difference. The people are serious yet very friendly. I would have to say that the majority of my socializing is now done in the gym. That's not as pathetic as it may sound because I am 1) using calories not consuming them 2) spending no extra money AND 3) I get to look at some of the best bodies around and can act like I'm merely commenting on their muscle development and degree of "rippedness" when actually I may just be drooling and . . . well, I'll leave the rest to your imaginations!

Yes, the one aspect of my eating that I should modify is the simply that once I start I tend to just keep going and going and going. Planning meals, snacks would be a big help because it means I would be planning an END to the meal/snack. As it is, it's too easy to have a little of this and that and a little more of this and that and that's how the calories add up. People at the gym all say they think I should be able to lose fat really easily and I think it's because they see the way I work out, which is really gung-ho, but eating has always been a stress reliever, a boredom reliever, you name it, it's everything but just calories and protein, carbs and fat. Well, I think you all understand, that's why we're here.

SheriaVa -- Hello, there. Congratulations on your weight loss! You have done so well. You must be really proud of yourself! I know how you feel about not really knowing your goal. I'm the same way. I don't have a number. I just have a look that I want to have and when I'm there I'll be able to say I've reached goal. Of course, bodies being what they are and I'm not young, it doesn't mean I'll like everything I see, oh my!, but I'm going to get the fat off for one thing. I just want to be able to look lean and tuck my shirt in and look like I spend all the time in the gym that I do! Good luck on your continued loss!

corning -- You sure had a great exercise day! Yes, those core exercises are tough. I have pilates tapes but just can't bear to do them. They seemed so boring. Also the tapes are so unattractive. Yes, both the Cindy Crawford tapes have great music. Why can't they make a pilates tape like those? What kind of dog do you have?


Take care everyone! Hope to hear from you soon! Ciao for now.

Welcome back SheriaVa. Has everything been ok?

Kathy - your smiles look great. What is the core video? Does it concentrate on the abs or something, like Pilates? I have been getting more interested in finding a good video or two so when the bad weather hits I can workout at home and not just pack on the pounds like I did last winter.

redballoon - 15 minutes spinning is great. Keep it up. In the future if you want/can maybe you'll increase to 20 but don't sell yourself short on the 15, particularly if you are working hard at it. I really need to meet people and was considering using the gym for that reason (besides the obvious reason of working out). I'm not sure I can afford it, but if it is really beneficial I would make the room in my budget. Can you comment more on how good you think the gym would be for meeting people, socializing, and making friends? Remember that I am not at the level you are so I wouldn't be able to have deep conversations about lifting.

Isn't it strange/funny that so many people have the same weight loss goal to be able to tuck in your shirt. Before I moved I had just starting tucking in and now, after gaining 10-13 pounds and being in a different life, I don't tuck in and know that I would look better if I did (more professional and put together - not less fat).

Have a great day everyone. I took the day off to wait for the repair man. Feeling really guilty about not being at work and not really enjoying the time at home (except for being able to catch up on posting ).

Alright... It's Thursday, one more day until Friday... I know I can do this. This week has lasted forever. I need my weekend lazy time!!!!

I can tell my stomach has shrinked, I am not absolutely starving now when I get home. I'm still hungry, but not so hungry that I want to eat the first thing I lay eyes on.

Monday I finally made it to the gym after telling myself I would go for the past 2 weeks. I did 20 minutes on the treadmill at a brisk walk/slow jog, then I lifted weights for another 30 minutes or so. Tuesday was my "off" day and I meant to go back yesterday, but I had a job interview out of town, so by the time I got back I was stressed and tired and couldn't stand the thought of leaving my house again. LOL So I have my bag packed and I'm going tonight after work. I'll just do my third workout on Saturday...

Tomorrow I'm taking my measurements... I'm very curious to see what kind of progress I have made with those. I've never taken measurements before and I took them last Friday morning after my first week on plan. I've lost 4.5 pounds, but I'm just not sure what that will equate to in inches over my body. I'm not expecting much, I know the bigger losses will take longer.

I have 3.5 more pound to go for my first unofficial "mini-goal". That will put me at 190, 15 pounds down from my highest weight. Even though I have only lost 4.5 pounds this go around, I keep having to remind myself that I've lost a TOTAL of 11 pounds... Those numbers sound so much better to my ears, and they aren't a lie... 15 pounds down sounds like magic to me right now...

I think that this new plan is going to work for me this time. No Super Bowl Parties, birthday's or any other "eating" holiday until Thanksgiving... Then, yes, it is Christmas, but all of my family are in Ohio while I'm in North Carolina, so I won't be tempted by the Christmas goodies... LOL I'm starting back at the gym 3 times a week with cardio and weight training, a good balance without burning myself out. I'm staying under 1500 calories a day (no less than 1300 though) and I don't feel as deprived as I did on a 1300 caloried diet.

So I guess in a nutshell I just wanted to share that everythinig is good here in my corner of the Singles world.

The gym totally kicked my butt today...

I got up early this morning to go to a Step Aerobics class at my gym. I've never been before and I thought it would be a good change from the treadmill and weights. WOW... About 20 minutes in and I couldn't move anymore. I consider myself fairly coordinated, but the instructor chick kept changing the steps mid-stride and before I even got the current step down.

I felt (and looked) like a complete and utter fool... So when she gave us a second to get a drink I left and went and cooled down a little. I was nausous and dizzy and I didn't like the feeling at all. Once I got cooled down a little I walked on the treadmill for another 10 minutes and called it a day.

I really wanted to do my weight training today, but I just couldn't take it this morning. I feel like a failure for not finishing that class... I know I'm not, because 1/2 of that class and more time on the treadmill is more than I would have done a few weeks ago, but I feel like I should have stuck it out.

Thanks for letting me vent like the drama queen I sometimes am... I hope everyone else's Saturday is off to a better start than mine...

IWMFT - good job with the working out. You are doing great and losing weight. The fact that you went to the gym and tried the class is a great accomplishment. Not only did you do 1/2 the class but you did TM afterwards! If you felt bad at the break I don't think you should have stuck out the class. You can always try another class another time and you will probably do even more. I find aerobics classes very difficult at the beginning because you spend more energy learning the moves. Focus on the glass being half full. btw - how did you measurements go?

It is raining here so all my plans (all outdoors) are shot and I am really not happy about it. I wanted to ride my bike and get in some exercise but now I don't know what to do. I really don't want to be unproductive, unhappy and eat but that is the direction I am going.