hey there darlin. you with the questions and worries and concerns. here's some of the real deal - according to jiff - on wls. and i'm sure everyone else will add as this goes along. [and just for the record, i just finished eating dinner- a small piece of lasagna with extra cheese]

first, wls is NOT a cop out for most people. of course, we're hearing about people who are eating themselves into more weight so that they will qualify for the surgery, but they're nuts.

wls is a last resort for many of us

wls is a tool that can be outsmarted and abused

the surgery is risky. we know of people who have died, who have been in ICU for weeks on end, and who have permanent disabilities. we also know people who have gained ALL their weight back and more. and we know someone who's having it reversed because she got so very very sick from the malabsorption that could not be corrected.

but we also know of far more people who are living quite happily.

the ones who succeed in losing the weight and keeping it off are those who commit to a lifestyle change. it's not about the food. it's about living a healthy life. exercise [sorry peachie, for the foul language!!!], water, protein, veggies. NO STRESS EATING. NO BOREDOM EATING. and that's probably the hardest part.

the wls is a tool that will help you not stress eat, but after a few months, if you have no other coping skills you'll get into BIG trouble.. marriages have broken up, by the way. no matter what happens, relationships will change because you're no longer swallowing your emotions with food. and you're no longer making dfood the center of your life.

that doesn't meant that you don't enjoy what you eat [after a few months!] or that you won't be able to go out and have a nice dinner. it's just that it'll be DIFFERENT. Aand that's one of the reasons i took up knitting again. i can't just sit around with friends/family at the table while they're eating and i've stopped. i needed to keep my hands busy.

the first few months after surgery ARE NOT EASY. but they pass, and it does get easier.

sooo ask away!!! there's lots of good info and wisdom around here...

That was very well said, Jiff!

peach

Great job Jiffy, Donna, like I said ask away, we are a friendly bunch and will answer almost everything.

..I am so confused. I work in westchester and months ago had met one of out csr's that works out on Long Island. She had had the surgery and though
I did not see the before, I did see the expressions and here the comments of everyone who had. This girl was so happy and energetic and I asked as many questions as possible without the rest of the group catching on. I don't know anything accept the womans first name, so I figured what the heck, I'll ask someone who knows her to put her in touch with me. Well, this morning she called(and I hadn't even asked anyone yet) she actually was calling me to speak with a customer. I re-introduced myself and said this is an omen. Well she gave me her number and I called her later that day and we talked for quite some time. She had a very positive experience. Hard, painful(she had her gall bladder removed atthe same time) but she said it was worth all the hard work. she suggested I call local hospitals and find support groups now.
Before I even make the decision. She also said that people who say it's the easy way out have no idea what they're talking about. She also states the success of it all depends on how willing you are to follow step by step, month by month the doctors & nutritionists orders. She knows people who have failed. She was also out of work for 8 wks. Her choice, she thinks she could have gone back in 3 or 4. I can't do that, or should I say won't do that. So I've heard some of the good, some of the bad and some of the ugly. But I certainly can say everyone on this site and this new friend at work, have been some of the most considerate, helpful and caring people I have come across in my life. So whether I do WLS or not, I've already benefited by this experience. you guys!

donna.. that woman gave you GREAT advice. and remember, this is NOT a decision to be made quicklyl you must do your research and talk to as many people as possible about it.

you're off to a great start with your learning!!! keep it up!!!!