Welcome to the discussion group, support group, Diet Coach group, Diet Buddy group relating to the two books by Dr. Judith S. Beck:and the first bookThe Beck Diet Solution is a psychological program, not a food plan. It provides a step-by-step program to learn specific techniques to stay on our diet, lose weight, and maintain our weight loss for life. The program is based on Dr. Beck's clinical research in Cognitive Therapy (CT).

The Complete Beck Diet for Life expands the earlier work and includes a food plan with suggested menus. From the cover:This is a place to discuss the Beck strategies and our daily efforts, to receive and provide support, and, for some of us, is where we serve as on-line diet buddy (coach) to each other.

If you’ve arrived from a search engine, you've landed at the site of 3 Fat Chicks (3FC), a remarkable place for those interested in a healthy life style, including mindful eating, exercise, and weight loss. More about the site, including how to register so that you can post, can be found here.

The books are available on Amazon through the 3FC store by clicking their names above; buying through 3FC helps to cover the costs of running this site.

You can find the list of previous (or more current) monthly Beck threads here on 3 Fat Chicks via:

Diet Coaches/Buddies – Standard Sunday walk, CREDIT moi, included two micro-libraries to peruse with no books brought home. A neighbor offered us a changing table for DGD but we realized that it would take up more room than we wanted to give up. We'll continue with a mat on the bed where, with two of us, we've become pretty good at controlling the wiggling and tendency to attempt to leap to her demise in any direction at any time.

Eating was on plan, CREDIT moi, because I limited myself to morning snack alone. Social hour on Sunday is a tough place to avoid nibbling. I was helped one day when a friend took a piece of fruit then immediately took out his journal to record it. We are not the only folks on the planet trying to be sane with food.


silverbirch – Ouch for the boundary thing requiring a call to the police. Behavior that calls for that is so unnecessary. Hope the drama reduces so you can get back on your work schedule.

maryann - Congrats for finishing those term papers. Your dinner with your DH sounds neat. Kudos for remembering what you asked 20 years ago.

nationalparker – Please, please, please don't tell me that I too will someday lose my taste for baby carrots. Don't think that I've reached my decade of eating them yet. Kudos for continuing to do all your food prep.

Karen (karenrn) - Can't wait to hear how the family does with the dog training. I so clearly remember the trainer who visited us telling us that our puppy was just fine; the humans had to learn to be more assertive. I was to act like the Head Dog since, by size and voice, the puppy knew that I was.

Readers -

Good morning coaches,

Well it's Monday and I'm feeling inspired. Food has been on plan. Today's exercise was walking the dog, but we added about 20 minutes. Then I came home and did some arm, ab and butt exercises from challenge sheets I printed off of blogilates. There was a photo of a gal on one of the FB group sites I follow who has been going to Crossfit. I went to the local Crossfit and checked it out. My niece and nephew will want to do drop in classes while they are here next week and I learned they have a beginning type class for strength training for older more out of shape folks like me. I think I may just sign up for a change. I need to do something that enables me to get Otis out for his walk first. The dog trainer is big on the dog getting his exercise. He even has dogs on treadmills or swimming in the pool. I really don't want to do either of those things, but Lord only knows what I might end up doing.

Bill Good job on passing up the books and the changing table. I know I'm wanting to get rid of things not accumulate. In fact I just remembered I have things in the back of the car for Goodwill.

Nationalparker You are a machine on that food prep. Good job. I was just trying to figure out something for dinner tonight. I guess I need to take your lead and at least plan the menus even if I don't do the prep until the day of. I saw the Hunt for the Wilderpeople some months ago at the theater and really enjoyed it.

Silverbirch Oh my goodness, the boundary dispute sounds awful. What a stressor that must be. The drama in our neighborhood is that one neighbor whose home is paid for, has pretty much abandoned it. I guess that is small potatoes compared to what you have going on.

Have a good start to the week everybody!

Another busy one. When my days weren't so jam packed and stressful, I was writing "another day on plan" ... now I see those days aren't as frequent. Today was mostly on plan, but that was possibly due to terror at seeing the scale up a gajillion pounds. DH and I both weighed in three pounds heavier in one day ... we were trying to think what it was from. But I'm up a good bit. Will see how it shakes out with more attention to eating regularly and not skipping my snacks and then going into a meal overly hungry. This plan isn't hard. It isn't a starvation plan, in fact she says if you're hungry, EAT. If you're still awake a few hours after dinner, eat another snack to keep your metabolism firing.

In chapter 7 of I still wish at times that I ran a B&B ... made a recipe of cinnamon roll cookies for DH to take in to his work this morning. They look like cinnamon rolls, but are cookies. Then tonight after I got home, I prepped another batch and just finished them for my office. I joked to DH that these would be a recipe that only got made twice a month at our B&B... too much work with the chilling the dough, rolling out, chilling, etc.

A neighbor had spinal surgery last week and the day after, she suffered something that mimics a stroke, but wasn't another stroke, but she still has a long way to go in rehab again. Got the ingredients to make a dinner with sides for them - DH suggested my chicken pot pie - it reheats easily and can be frozen if they like. Our weather turned cold and blustery, so it sounded like a good plan. Will try to do that tomorrow night, because I have to leave town early Wednesday morning for two days. If I don't, there's no time limit on bringing something over, so can wait until Friday.

DH and I headed out to see his younger daughter's apartment yesterday evening. I didn't want to go, in all honesty. I felt like it was another opportunity for him to be let down. It actually went well. She was opening cupboards, pulling out this and that and telling us where she got it, - church mission shop, 63 cents. Goodwill, 29 cents, etc. We brought a box of things from our cabinets, but didn't go overboard. At one point, I went over to her took her face in my hands and said, "We're proud of you. You're doing a good job, and you're making smart choices. But PLEASE be true to who you are. You're smart, you deserve to be respected. Don't let anyone talk you into doing anything that you know is wrong. Don't let ANYONE bring you down with them. You control your future... and we're proud of you." ... well, she started crying and said I'm the first one to tell her that, she never hears that. She knows to not let anyone bring her down, etc. ... I wondered how she was going to blow her nose with all her nose piercings. Turns out without tissues in a first apartment, you just don't. We took her out to dinner, and will pick up a few things this week, I suppose. Some bins for her clothes and put things like cat care items, cleaning products, food storage, Puffs, paper towels, etc. I feel like I'm setting myself up to get taken advantage of, so we'll see. But I ended up having to about push DH toward her to give her a hug when she was crying. He doesn't read situations well. Thanks for letting me release here. If you can see down the road and know I'm setting myself up to get taken advantage of, clue me in.

Karen - I still haven't seen "A Man Called Ove" - wanted to but I just couldn't get deep into the book at all. I still want to read The Nightingale from your recommendation but know that'll be later in summer.

Bill - How well you describe DGD's wiggleworm tendencies. I used to care for twins and at diaper changing time when they could understand me, it always started out "ONCE upon a time there was a little boy named... " or a little girl named... and they'd lay (lie? - i never can get that one right ... Maryann, correct me!) there waiting to hear what "their" story was - one-minute funnies.

Silverbirch - Oh, I'm so sorry to hear about the neighbors and the drama - that is just so unsettling. I hope it is resolved here soon and doesn't drag on with the uncomfortableness for too long. Are they permanent residents - as in you'll have to deal with them for the foreseeable future? Credits for handling and moving on with everything else and not letting it encroach on all aspects of your life.

Diet Coaches/Buddies – Eating on plan, CREDIT moi, was helped by sitting through an evening meeting with snacks on the table from which I sampled sparsely. The big deal is that I took NO trail mix with its dark chocolate chips. I took mostly baby carrots and a few dried figs. Dried figs are not low calorie, but they are low in pulling me into overeating.

The planned walk to class was replaced by driving when I decided to test my new thermal mug by making coffee for class at home rather than buying it there. So I gave up a desirable walk to see if I could save $1. The experiment worked but I'm a bit disappointed that I would have paid a buck for a pleasant bit of exercise. Priorities are easy to confuse.


nationalparker – I'll be one of the first customers at your B&B for the variety of food you'll serve. I'll even sign up for your vegetarian version. Super Kudos for working with your SDD to help her in an awkward place. My take is that you're not setting yourself up. From her place in life almost anything she does will feel like she's trying to take advantage of you - but your kindness isn't causing that. Enjoy the success of your visit; you earned it.

Karen (karenrn) - Neat to let Crossfit help you get into your resistance exercises. Hard for me to picture dogs on treadmills as a rational idea.

Readers -

My bus ride home wasn’t as “fun”- they almost didn’t let me on the bus since I had no ID with me. I had cleaned out my wallet at home to bring only a few necessary cards, and apparently I left my drivers license! I made it to my moms house with no problem, but coming back they said if you buy an online ticket you need to show id. Finally some kind worker took pity on me and re=issued the tickets and I was on my way. It was all a bit much! Also someone was smoking on the bus which is of course not allowed, but its probably hard for the driver to enforce. I was quite glad to get home!

Walked into the door and DD was having a meltdown so it was a hard homecoming. I’m staying home sick today since this cold has knocked me sidewise and will re-group with food etc.

I skimmed a book at my parents house- 10% Happier- which was about quieting your brain and meditation, written by Dan Harris, a very driven news correspondent. One phrase I came away with was to ask yourself when worrying “Is this helpful”. I’m going to use that!

Wave to all!

Good morning coaches,

Just back from another longer walk with Otis. He is doing fine with the longer walks. I downloaded the Ap C25K, which is couch to 5K for running and thought we might try that, but darn I forgot my glasses and couldn't really see how to start it. So, I listened to the book I'm listening to as we walked.

Last evening I went to a small group welcome gathering at our church as the kick off for a 6 week study. I am proud to report that I passed on all the food. I did eat dinner before I went which was a good thing. The desserts were purchased, but they looked pretty darned good and there was a variety. I was glad I had decided before hand that I wouldn't have anything. It is such a good feeling to exercise the resistance muscle and follow through.

Yesterday I made a trip to the Goodwill in the afternoon. I filled the cooler my friends left here with small kitchen appliances and gadgets. I have a large closet/cupboard in the garage where I keep those things that won't fit in the kitchen as well as the decorations. I am sure I hadn't used those items I donated for years. I also donated lots of cookbooks. I still have many, many more. It felt good and I should probably continue on, since we are going to have to clean out the kitchen before too long. I also thought I had better start eating out of the cupboards again. In fact I think I'll go through some kitchen cupboards today. I have so many pots and pans. I need to get rid of some of them too.

Curlyjax That must have been nerve wracking to think they may not let you back on the bus. I like the "Is this helpful?" line. I don't worry as much as I used to, but I still lean a bit that way. I've always known it's true that so little of what we worry about ever happens.

Bill I really hand it to you for bypassing the food at so many of your functions. Last night they started talking about potluck and all I could think of is that I get out of the house to get away from food and thinking about something else, not to be around more food. I guess there aren't many like us. Believe it or not the dogs on treadmills is a big thing. They are all over his website K9Katelynn.com and on his YouTube videos. I don't think my dog will be though.

Nationalparker Maybe the step daughter is finally growing up a bit. You know when you talk about her taking advantage, I just look back and think that my parents could have thought the same of me when I was much younger. But they were my parents, they expected to be helping me out. In any event, great job on saying that you are proud of her. I do really think sometimes people rise to what they believe is expected.

Well, I guess I had better do my arm, ab and butt exercises before I forget and then I really will move on to the kitchen cupboards.

Take care and have a great day!

Coaches!

I'm on the bus heading home from my last special needs students art class. Two semester's worth of teaching behind me.*credit* We are having a big to-do to celebrate the students and their accomplishments next week. Exhibition catalogue, bidding on artwork, catering, speeches, muckymucks, the whole shabang (shebang?). I wanted to be in the 250's as my personal goal and today I slid on into them: 259.6. After three mornings of seeing the inconceivable number 260.1 (hello? .1???!!!) I held the line, stays on plan, and it happened. Now to persist in victory and not go back up. Truthfully, I feel good on moving down the scale for the next 20lbs.

I'm ready.

Finally, the sun was out today after days of gloomy rain. Still brisk and windy. I'm back in winter garb, suede boots, etc.

The thing regarding stepdaughter is I'm fine helping out. I'm NOT fine with the expectation that no matter how you treat DH, cursing him out, calling him a F-bombing this or that, that we are there to help no matter what. No. Not accepting that. There are repercussions to every choice they make and that is one of them. My folks certainly helped me out but I was appreciative and never asked for one dollar from them. I'd be picking my teeth off the driveway if I ever thought about cussing my folks out. Early on in our relationship, his older daughter was screaming at him and calling him worthless f-this and that ... and he was just almost checking out ... I said tell her the next time she does that, she loses her phone service. That's it. So he told her and she was like, Well, F you. So within two minutes the phone was cancelled. She didn't think he'd go through with it but got a lesson. Their mom is the same way, everything is a foul screaming match. The years we had to deal with her were terrible. Initially, one of his daughters was living with him until she found out he wasn't going to be shopping for her all the time. She literally said, well, never mind, I'll move back in with mom if you're not going to be buying me all new stuff. This was after he'd already rented the two bedroom apartment, etc. Such a history of them taking.

Back on the road tomorrow for two days for another work event. Again on Phase 2, which I find it hard to handle on the road. I'm hoping to just sail on with as much on program and not stress about it. Weight remains up ... aware of it but adding more stress right now about it isn't helping me.

CurlyJax - Thanks for the book idea. I put it on hold at my library. Thank goodness for libraries!! Glad you were able to make it home safely, but bummer on the DD drama. Girls are so dramatic, I swear.

Karen - Kudos on the donation dropoffs. I found it easier to cull things one type at a time - holiday decor, cookbooks, linen closet, etc. That's where I made more headway. Then I regretted passing on a few old cookbooks, even with nearly every recipe online. We have Yetis for our water cups... they've amazed our coworkers on how long the ice lasts. Those Yeti coolers are so $$!

Diet Coaches/Buddies – Walked, CREDIT moi, to an evening lecture about the pathogen that caused the potato famine in Ireland starting in 1845. Boston is home to a zillion Irish who migrated over the next years. Turns out that the pathogen wasn't limited to Ireland. It also existed in the U.S. and in other parts of Europe and South America. Ireland is remembered because potatoes were the major food source - for some the only food source - making it subject to famine. Odd detail: it was "fungus-like" - not exactly a fungus. Nature is more convoluted than our attempts to classify into simple groups.

It was a day of no snacks, CREDIT moi. Dinner was New England Clam Chowder, eaten indoors - an unusual treat from Whole Foods. We had no oyster crackers so tried to substitute corn chips. Alas, there is no substitute for oyster crackers when having chowder. One needs to prepare better. I did pull out a package of bread sticks that I remember as incredibly good. They had an expiration date of May 2016 so DW immediately put them in the compost. That means that for a year I've passed them in the pantry every time I've felt the munchies and not fallen. A separate CREDIT moi for a year of avoiding an unnecessary carb snack.


onebyone – Welcome 250's!!! Congrats on completing two semesters of teaching art class. Gotta love, "I'm ready."

nationalparker – Ouch for having to put the winter clothes back on. I do know how easily the brain is teased into thinking summer after a brief warm spell. Good luck with your traveling meal plan.

Karen (karenrn) - Kudos, indeed, for passing on the food at your meeting. [I forwarded your link about dogs on treadmills to my DS who has two - suggesting that he was behind the times. He didn't bite, LOL.]

curlyjax - Thanks for “Is this helpful” - I'll remember that. What a mind boggling saga of almost not being allowed on the bus.

Readers -

Good morning coaches,

Just back from a walk with Otis. Today is a busier day with a hair appointment (new hairdresser) at 9 a.m. and then the kitchen designer, contractor and cabinet person at noon. I am anxious to see what plans they come up with. We were starting to talk about a driving vacation to MN in about September, but I think we will have to see about how long the kitchen remodel takes. We may just need to stay here, although hopefully in our friends condo.

Well I shouldn't have bragged about passing up the goodies at church, cause I proceeded to have a couple of unplanned snacks yesterday. That was the end of my weekly points for sure. The rest of the week needs to be very on plan.

Better get ready to go, personals tomorrow.

Very stressful day. Computer issues. Ate oatmeal raisin cookie after lunch, they were served to us. I wanted it bc everyone else had one. Walked a lot and figured I'd skip dessert at dinner bc I knew it'd be served. This was chocolate chip cookie. Frustrated and ATE IT. these aren't small cookies but large ones. Cookies that'd be sold separately. Fail. I keep making choices that got me fat. I'm on the way up.

I'm reading but with no time to call my own this week. This is from my phone. Lots of driving yesterday, made more because of road resurfacing work and because a lorry load of new potatoes (those are the first of the season) lost its load all over the road. I think the catch on the rear doors broke. My goodness.

Solicitor (= first stage lawyer) today re boundary. And I'd like to fit in exercise.

Hope we all have an on plan day.

Diet Coaches/Buddies – DGD day was more intense than usual. She invented a game of throwing herself boldly, head-first out of the bouncy house at the indoor play space. The problem was that the small, inflated exit slide ended some four inches above a thin carpet over the concrete floor. I had the job of directing an inflated cushion to the spot that she'd land. Then pick her up to place her back inside. She'd giggle, then throw herself down again. The force was strong. I'm impressed that she's so capable of nearly killing herself at a mere 19 months. Later, I walked to an evening lecture that, fortunately, didn't offer food.

Eating was on plan, CREDIT moi, including no snacks. Again, I found myself thinking that ice cream would be great after dinner. So again, I reminded my wandering mind that I wasn't in need of ice cream; I was in need of finishing the chapter of the book that's the required reading for today's class.


silverbirch – Congrats for getting a Solicitor so that you can bring this nightmare to a conclusion. Thanks for "Hope we all have an on plan day."

nationalparker – Ouch. An oatmeal raisin cookie has never been shown to fix a Microsoft Operating System problem, LOL. Keep the faith.

Karen (karenrn) - Yep, it makes sense to be around for the kitchen remodeling. My memory is that the unexpected could be expected to occur.

Readers -

Good Morning, Coaches.

Added this bookmark to my school computer. Maybe I'll post more often. True to my word but much to my despair I changed my ticker up 3 pounds. It is what it is which in this case is the truth. Big girl's weekend so I have tried to stick close to OP for a couple of days. Goodness knows I don't want to go higher.

First things first. I've been this weight before and I have lost this weight before. I know how to do it and I am capable of doing it.

What should have been an easy girl's weekend has turned into a drama fest by one member of our team. My job today is to respect her anxiety. I know how it feels and also respect the feelings of those she has trampled on. The most important thing is maintaining the 30 plus years friendships. So many friendships are absolved for trivial reasons only to be missed years later.

I think I have a good perspective and a good food plan.

Have a great weekend.