so yesterday my downstairs neighbour bangs on my door to complain about noise at nights.

She told me to stop screaming at 1am and how she wasnt putting up with it anymore and that she would be complaining to my landlord.

Heres the thing - it wasnt me. I was in bed asleep at 1am on saturday morning and didnt hear a thing.

I tried to explain this to her but it was obvious she didnt believe me and said it had been happening since she moved in this year (Feb).

It was obvious it was really pissing her off as she was really quite aggressive but it really honestly wasnt me.

I have a theory on who it could be but having never heard it myself i dont even know what kind of screaming it is.

Ive downloaded an app to record any noise in my bedroom at night so that if it happens again i can play her any recordings.

What can i do? I know its up to her to prove its me but i dont want to get into trouble with my landlord. Ive lived here for 4 years and have never had any worries or complaints and generally got on with all my neighbours.

Im really stressed about it. I hardly slept last night cause i was listening for any noise - i heard nothing.

i hope when she realises she is wrong and that it isnt me she feels bad about how she was but i doubt it. i need to prove it wasnt me but how can i?

At this point, she has no evidence it was you. She needs to be able to bring up enough evidence to convince anyone that it was you, which apparently she does not have other than the hunch that it is you. It's like the saying innocent until proven guilty. It's her word against yours in this situation, and since you have been a good neighbor for years and on terms with your landlord and she just moved in this year, I don't think you will have much to worried about.

As for a way to defend yourself, you should continue recording for yourself and ask your other neighbors if they have been hearing anything. If it has been since February that she's been hearing this, I can't imagine that absolutely no one else besides her has heard it before by now. If no one can corroborate her story, that just makes it harder on her; and if someone has heard something, they can back you up since you have another person to support you. All in all, I'd be more worried if she acted too aggressively with you and that may need to be addressed at some point if you feel the need, but other than that I don't believe you should be too worried over getting in trouble for one unprovable complaint in years.

When I lived in my apartment, I had an upstairs neighbor that would play his stereo and/or guitar and sing at all hours of the night. To the point where I could not sleep it was so loud.

Some neighbors don't say anything because they fear the perpetrator will retaliate.

The only thing a landlord can do is send a notice to the tenant to cease the activity. You can certainly state your case to the landlord and also address the aggressive nature of this tenant.

Unless this downstairs neighbor has witnesses or she calls the police, she really does not have any proof. I myself called the cops of numerous occasions, they came in to my apartment, listened for themselves and then went up and addressed the problem. Then I could complain to the landlord and had proof - the police report.

Maybe approaching this other tenant when she isn't so upset or combative. Explain the situation and say that you would like to assist if you can?

Story: An elderly neighbor complained that my friends were playing loud music all the time. She could hear the bass "thump thump thumping" all hours of the day and night........she was hearing her heart beat....

Sorry this is happening to you.

It's a good idea to record night noises. You never know...you might be a different person while asleep!

Try not to stress or worry about it. If you are not the source of noise, I don't think you will be bothered by police or landlord. The woman is troubled, so I would first approach her problem with kindness. (She's losing sleep and is not herself, let's assume.) To get this woman "off your back", send the landlord a note. Just stick to the facts and the sequence of events. The woman is being kept awake by a noisy neighbor, and has falsely accused you. Simply and emphatically state that loud noises are not coming from your apartment at night. (This is all you need to say, you do not need to violate your own privacy by explaining what does, or does not, go on in your apartment.) Express hopefulness that the landlord will solve the neighbor's problems, as you also have an interest in keeping the neighborhood from taking a turn towards the rowdy. Write the note with the assumption that the neighbor will see it, 'cause she prolly will. If the landlord is lazy, and comes to you for answers, just close the door and say firmly: "It's not me."

If the neighbor approaches you again, give her the most sympathetic look you can muster and say something like: "I'm so sorry you are being kept awake at night. That would be so upsetting to me as well, as I have to work every day and need my sleep." She's wrong, but give her that wiggle room she will need to apologize later--you never know, you both might need each other if there are nasty neighbors that need evicting. And if she's bat_ crazy, it's even more important to keep her in good graces.

Adopt a kind and helpful attitude. Use the note as a preemptive strike. Put the ball in the landlord's court. Walk away. Continue with weight loss plan.

SMF, you just reminded me that I used to hear my heart beat all the time and it drove me crazy! I kept asking DH what that noise is and he said he didn't hear any noise. Finally I realized it was my heart beat. But now I just realized that I don't hear it anymore and I don't know when or why it stopped. But I'm glad. Well, my heart didn't stop, just me hearing it. LOL I would not be happy if my heart stopped.

thanks for the replies. I know its up to her to prove it but I cant relax at home now and im dreading the weekend coming in case she comes knocking again. I keep rehearsing in my head what ill say if she does.

Oh, hun... This really is too small for you to worry all week about! But I know how you feel, because I dislike confrontation as well. Reading stuff like This helps. Channel your inner kindergarten teacher.

You don't have to answer your door. You don't have to reply.

We just got a noise complaint last night! We can actually be evicted if there are too many. We knew that at the time, my husband was working, my daughter was sleeping, and I was reading. It just couldn't have been us. We called the office this morning just to let them know that we received the complaint and while we are sympathetic, it wasn't us. We have heard some loud new neighbors, but I can't swear it's them.

I thought it was better to call and calmly let them know it wasn't us than to ignore it. I can't fix something that isn't me in the first place.

I think it would be a good idea to let your property manager know that this happened, that the person was unpleasant and kind of threatening, and that the noise isn't you. And if you can, go talk to that person when you're calm and they are and let them know that you're sympathetic to their situation but you're not the one causing the noise and good luck figuring it out, let me know if I can do anything, etc, blah blah blah.

It's much harder for people to be crazy pants PITA neighbors when they know you and you stay calm, helpful, and refuse to engage. It just makes them look nuts. It's hard to keep up that kind of one sided momentum.