Well I have only been on this forum for about a week. 7 posts. One reply from another newbie because I said hi! One post I was really needing support and help and have had no replies. My two main posts have had nearly 600 views and not one person even said hi. If this is the level of support and friendship I am not surprised many people fail in dieting.

To be honest. I haven't seen any of your posts I tend to stick to two areas of the forum so I miss a lot. It's a big forum and time is finite! Could I suggest maybe joining one of the challenges in, for example, "chicks up for a challenge". I find they tend to be chattier and quite supportive!

Hi Windrifter Here's a great thread for support & accountability--come join us
http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/weig...elcome-11.html

It's almost the perfect metaphor for everyone's weight loss journey.

If you really want to change you can not put your own goals/expectations onto any other person. It is a journey you will take on your own. Sometimes you will have a crowd to cheer you on and say congrats but often you will only have the person in the mirror. And in time you will have the crowd hope you stumble and waiting to see you fall off the wagon and some even encouraging it. Lashing out at others will do nothing for you it is no one else's job to encourage you to work for what you want. Putting the blame for your own lack of discipline or drive on others will only keep you in the same place.

That is why so many are not able to follow through, it is no one else's job to make you get your health/fitness on track. There will be tough times and if you can not get through it on your own... you may be disappointed like you are now. You can argue the issue or lash out at me and call me mean or cold...OR you can look yourself in the mirror and start fighting for what you want and go get it for yourself!

Chin up! Find that inner drive/strength and best of luck each of us have been in your place at one time!

..and inaccurate. Several people responded to your other post.

But stick around, find an active thread and just jump in.

You're blaming failing your diet because people aren't saying hi? That's why you are failing. Excuses and more excuses. Change your lifestyle permanently and you can be a healthy weight. You need to make changes to your life and not pass it on to others as to why you fail. Cut out added sugar. Keep your net carbs under 100, lower if you can. Stop eating processed packaged foods. Eat less. There you go.

Welcome, Windrifter, and congratulations for the success in weight loss you have already achieved.

Sorry you have not yet received the support you anticipated. I support the suggestions above that you simply jump into a different area of the forum--a weight loss challenge, a diet-centered area, etc., where the conversations are more focused.


I suspect that other posters might be responding to a negative tone they are hearing in your thread title. I'll add a cliche'd: "Be the change that you want to see in the world." You want support? Come back and show the rest of us how to properly give some support...You've already had a remarkable success! Surely, you have stories?

Some of the posters have jumped on you about how you can't blame others for your failures, and while true, is also a bit harsh. None of us are here because we are perfect at this, we all came here looking for something. That the something is more often accountability to OURSELF is something that often takes awhile to manifest.

We used to have a welcome wagon here at 3FC,I don't know if that still exists, but the truth is not a lot of people respond to the "hi I am new!" threads in part because they blur together and so often people post once and vanish.

The vast majority here are very welcoming, but you have to find them, many will not go find you. Most people have only a few forums or a few threads they read and post in regularly and they won't even see your posts if you start new thread topics. Find a thread that is already very active - not by the number of posts, but look to see how many have posted in the last day or week, and jump in. The weight loss thread SunDove posted may be one of the more active ones right now.

And even then people may not respond to you. Not because they are deliberately ignoring you or you have offended them, but because they come in with something they want to say, and to check up on people they already know and they may simply overlook for awhile. Keep posting, respond to others and people will jump in.

Also, realize, that weight loss IS by its very nature a self-involved activity. There are many here who do their best to be supportive of others, but at the end of the day we are all here to help ourselves deal with whatever burdens and roadblocks we have to healthy loss. Sometimes you can get what you need simply by reading the other persons experiences even if you don't quite know how to respond to it. When you post you may be giving a boost to others even if they dont directly acknowledge it. And vice versa, instead of looking for posts aimed AT you, look for posts that resonate with you. You can gain a lot of knowledge here just by reading.

Hi Windrifter, I too felt a little..."some kinda way" when I first joined and posted on the newbie/introductions thread. I noticed that several people viewed my post but no one responded. I decided to try another thread that seemed to have people with different styles/characteristics in age, race, weight loss/fitness goals, family make up etc..When I posted, they welcomed me with open arms and I post with them regularly. It is the same one that Sundove referenced. I joined in April therefore, I am fairly new as well. Sooooo, welcome and join us on the other thread if you like.

hi Windrifter. I have felt the same way in the past in a forum. Not this website. Posting new thread. Seeing how many people read. And yet not getting any responses. It sort of was a trigger for my already existing thoughts and feelings, if that makes sense.

I think whomever suggested finding an active thread and joining in, had a great idea. To choose a thread where lots of people post each day. And just introduce yourself. Sundove posted a link for a thread that happens to be very active. And there are some great people who post there. So I do hope to see you there.

Oooooh, Flower 123, I love your avatar! See that? She has over 800 posts and I never saw her before.

This is just a big, busy board. Being new here is like being new at a gigantic high school. Lots of people will just walk past you in the halls thinking of their own concerns, but if you look around a little you'll find a group that is a lot like you with shared interests, and when you do, just sit down at their table and they'll be happy to have you join them.

Just want to say hi and good luck to you .