WELCOME!!

We are a group of individuals who weigh or have weighed 300+, or near there. This group was formed to provide a place for others like us to find support, inspiration, and hope. We are aware of the distinct problems that come with weighing over 300 lbs.

We want to invite everyone (roosters as well as chicks!) to join us in our journey. We share laughter and tears, heartaches and fears ... joys and celebrations. We also share what works for us and what doesn't.

We have found this thread to be more than just a support group... we have found it to become a home. We invite you to join us!

Good day Chicks!
The weather is so nice today. The calm before the storm. I will go to the store later with the rest of the town to make sure I have a variety of healthy foods so I won't be tempted to binge when I get cabin fever.
I am so excited! Today was my first weigh in since recommitting last week. I am down 6 pounds. One more pound to go and I will be below that NASTY 300 AGAIN!
Betsy did you read my post about moving even closer to the kids and not buying a house with too many stairs? Just my 2 pennies.
Fi sending you a hug. Keep posting if you can.
Donna I think the new lady at church was looking for a friend. By you breaking down and admitting you needed help it opened a door for her.
Porthardy did you get a swim in today? I think I am your opposite person in the universe. Everything you say is opposite of me. It is giving me great insight onto my issues. Thanks!
Tootsie I asked my husband to get his fill of junk food at work. He should be eating healthier and he will. He always let's me pave the way. Does your husband like some junk food that is not tempting to you? Maybe he could keep that in the house.
Sam isn't it always the occasions we dread that turn out to make us feel good for going? I am a huge fan of Keep It Simple Sweetie.
Hi Terra and everyone else.

Arghhhh today i want to throw my against a wall and then beat it with a hammer and quit this diet NOW!!! I am trying with all my might to not quit this diet but seriously not having fun right now. I was 227.8 for the first time after yo-yo ing up and down the same pound. Yesterday i was 228.0 and now today im 229.6 What the flip is this??? Yesterday was even a day off from swimming and usually i drop but today i gained again and i swear i am not due for my TOM for another 2 weeks. I dont get it.. I am 100%on plan and i count every macro. The past 2 dys ive averaged 12-1300 cals and 15.5 net carbs. So whhhhyyyy? Yesterday i was depressed..today im just plain angry!

End of Rant...kind of

We're going to Orlando again. My spouse's work is paying for the hotel because he is doing training. The children and I will be vacationing. (I still technically have to work, but I can do my job from anywhere.) The last time we went, I remembered ladies in beautiful summer dresses. I was looking at cute dresses on the Simply Be website, wishing that I could fit in them and look ok. Not beautiful, not perfect, just normal. I don't wear dresses because I never feel feminine in them. Wishing isn't getting me anywhere.

I was hungry this morning, after already eating a banana and peanut butter crackers. I was looking at the junk food around the house. Did a mile of my four mile Leslie Sansone workout video instead. My left foot, the one that constantly hurts now, was on fire by the end of that mile. I wasn't hungry after that... Just extremely thirsty. I got ice water. It's great how sweet that water tastes when you're really thirsty. This is a small victory, but a victory anyway. I beat a craving.

Hi everyone.

Well I'm back after gaining weight and determined (again) to lose it. I was completely out of control over the holidays and it showed. Not just on the scale, but in my clothes and most importantly in the way I felt. I was stressed about Christmas and about my job ending, so I did what I always do - I ate, and ate some more, and here I am.

I've been out of work for a month now, and so far it's great. I went to So. Carolina and Florida for 12 days with DH and his son to visit his other son (in SC) and his sister and various other friends and relatives in FL. I had a great time. The very best part was walking on the beach and feeling the sand and ocean between my toes. There is just something about the ocean for me. It really makes me want to lose weight, if for no other reason than to feel comfortable in a bathing suit again, so I can go to the beach in the summer.

Since Wednesday I've been working on eating better and have lost a few pounds already. I updated my tracker to reflect my weight as of yesterday morning. It hurt to have to type in a number over 300 again, but I need to be accountable and honest. I will probably still weigh daily but will most likely only update my tracker once a week (if there is a change).

I saw my PCP today for my annual physical. Usually she is on my case to lose weight, but today was different. I think it was because she believed that I lost weight last year (before gaining a bunch of it back) and was working on it again. It has been over a year since I've seen her. Now she wants to see me again in 3 months to see how I'm progressing. That will help me stay accountable.

I realize I'm rather chatty today but I feel like I've been away forever. I read most of the January thread and I'm glad to see you all still here. I know I do much better when I'm here. I have missed you, but I felt rather guilty posting here when I wasn't trying or even thinking about trying to lose weight. I know I shouldn't. We all struggle, and we all need help. It's good to be back.

I hope you all have a good day.

Hey Ubee...sadly no swim today..my dh injured himself at work and had to go to the ER...Turns out he has a fractured wrist and might need surgery...but its hard to tell cause he has to have a CT scan first. We live 3 hours away from the nearest CT machine so we must wait for a call.

Hi! Nice to meet you. Sorry your back here with regain but better now than never. One step at a time.

Evenin all!

Trying to get a post in every day...Slowly but surely

Betsy Sounds like you had a nice weekend with the family. Moving closer to them sounds like a good idea. What will Bill do when you move?

Port Don't take this the wrong way but stress can cause your weight to fluctuate upwards. I know this is a do or die time in your weight loss journey..Boy don't I know it! But you can't let the scale not moving get to you...or seeing it go up. This early in the game you are setting yourself up for failure by doing so. Yes, it's ok to be a little bothered by it, that's normal. But you can't beat yourself up to the point of stressing to the max about it, and to me that's what's happening. Take a step back and take a breather. It will get better just stick with it. <3

Donna So glad you found a new friend! I think I'm with you and Betsy on this one, I hate asking for help. I'd rather be out living in my car then to have to ask someone to help pay a bill or if I need to use something, or what not. This lady sounded like she was looking for a friend too ...Hope it all works out!

Tootsie I know what you mean about not feeling pretty in dresses. I used to feel like I was wearing a tent when I'd wear a dress. Find something that you like that's comfortable and work it girl!!! As long as you like it don't worry about what people with think. Great job on beating that craving! Those things are monsters sometimes!

Ubee I am really glad that I went. It was nice to get to spend a little more time with her and get to talk with her family. They all were really great. Hope you had a great weekend! And uh, HELLO!?!?! 6 pounds go girl!!!!

Cindy Welcome back! I've missed you too dear. Glad you were able to have some fun over Christmas visiting family and such. I live in S. Carolina so I know what you mean about the beach. I like it here about as much as I love the winter in the mountains. Hope you'll stick around it's not a party without you here!

Had a good Monday. I've had no problems with sticking to plan and got my workout in. I did some cardio and back exercises tonight. Wanted to do some shoulder work but I was pooped after all the back work. There's always tomorrow.

Have a great night lovelies!

Still a dark time for me: pain in my chest from depression, plus gloomy thoughts. I'm unsure about whether I should post because I know my emotions come through loud and clear when I do so. I don't want to be a bummer for anyone.

It's actually a little better than it was, because Bob listened to me as I talked about what I'm learning from Mike (instructor/healer in Chinese medicine) and understood how meaningful this process is for me. That is, it's not just the rehab and getting my legs back; it's a whole new way of thinking about body, mind, and spirituality. I'm frustrated, though, that he's so dense. He's only just now getting it. This is not the man I married.

Another good thing is that I read Peter Matthiessen's The Snow Leopard over the past few days. Marvelous book! Thrilling in so many ways....

I see Mike tomorrow. =whew=

Fi...I am no expert on men( Heaven knows!) but is Bob having difficulty with the Chinese medicine because it is so very different to our Western way of interpreting things? I know when I studied acupuncture that the complexity of the Chinese approach made my brain boggle and I was studying only the relief of pain from a Western..ie evidence based ....perspective. Give him time...if you can. And enjoy (if that is the right word!) your time with Mike.....he sounds wonderful.
Hey Sam my heroine......you truly inspire me! Every time I think I cannot dream of losing the weight I need to I look at your ticker and it cheers me on!
Betsy.....I know that alot of British speech has been modified by American TV....that isn't a complaint, I think Americans have the most wonderful way of expressing themselves...but us Welsh types cling to the sing-song accents of our forefathers....we also talk VERY quickly! So I type as I write....in my Welsh accent!I am glad I entertain though!!
Cindy....welcome back my lovely!
Ubee.....way to go 6lbs!!!

Well Sam and I both managed 22 lengths at the pool last night. I put Argan Oil on my hair and wore a swimming cap ( yes I looked ridiculous!) but if it saves my lovely new hair colour then it is worth it! I am debating going to the gym later in the week to prove to myself that if I have a coughing fit...the sky won't fall in. I get a bit embarrassed about my cough....not the size of my butt on the treadmill you understand......just the coughing fits I have!
I also managed a dog walk completely in the DRY today!! It is quite chilly here today but dry dry dry........oh the joy!
Well...big hugs...must go and check my chicken soup!
Donna

It ate my reply.

My scale moved down-didn't expect it because my food choices haven't been the best. I assume that it may be broken, so I ordered a new higher capacity scale.

Trying to get my spouse to get different fruits and veggies-need to replace current food options with better options.

Want to teach my kids better eating habits. I'm worried about their health.

Don't understand why others think that weight loss is all about eating less and moving more. You can eat the same quantity of healthy food options vs calorie dense options, but get a lot more calories with the calorie dense options-so it's not about eating less-but making wiser choices.

Good morning from the absolutely gorgeous Pacific Northwest with blue skies, bright sun, and a glowing white mountain. Maybe I should rephrase that -- sounds like she's about to blow!

Ubee -- Thanks so much for starting up the February thread. And, yes, of course I read your advice. I always read your advice and sometimes I actually follow it! I'm only looking at houses that are one story and hopefully about half the size of my current one. Of course, I still want a big enough yard that my neighbors can't see what I'm cooking for dinner and that is fenced. It will be a year at least before I move -- just trying to figure out where I want to live at this point. The kids seemed much more receptive to it at this point, and Bill is almost never home any more now that he has a girl friend. Now for the most important comment: 6 POUNDS -- WAY TO GO!!!!!

Porthardygurl -- Ditto on what Sam said (she is our official guru on weight loss!). Hope your hubby's wrist is ok -- these emergencies definitely are always a challenge for me in terms of staying on plan.

Tootsie -- A working vacation -- sounds like so much fun. I'm with you on dresses. In my case, both shins have venous stasis (blood pools under the skin because of extremely poor circulation) and they look like I have some horrible disease. People have actually grimaced when they see them. So I totally get this thing about wearing dresses. Have a great time and just enjoy being with your family.

Cindy -- Great to see you back here. Several of us have gone through the regain phase of trying to lose. Fortunately, none of us gained it all back and I think that says something good about us. I love the fact that you're having such a good time while on hiatus -- maybe not working any more would be a good thing?

Sam -- Glad you're posting every day (or trying to). Just having you report about staying on plan and exercising helps so much with making me realize that this way of eating needs to be a habit and not a temporary event.

Fi -- Please don't stop posting. You're not a bummer for us and I think all of us feel great sympathy for you for what you're going through both physically and emotionally. I'm glad Bob is beginning to see the light in terms of understanding what you're getting from Mike. Hopefully Bob has gotten his prescriptions by now -- could that be causing some of the changes in his behavior?

Donna -- Please do keep typing as you talk as I'm enthralled by it. And I'm to an age where getting enthralled doesn't happen much! 22 laps in the pool -- and walking! -- wow! Good for you. Hope the oil and cap helped to protect your hair.

I went in for my bone density scan yesterday and am happy to report I still have bones. Then I went to Costco for supplies. The most amazing thing happened. I was over in the fruit and vegetable section and that is where I got excited about shopping. Normally, I have to almost close my eyes and rush past the candy and chips, but just passed them up and hit the fruits and veggies. They even had cut up butternut squash so I can roast some and make soup. I realize I could just buy one and do it, but man, peeling one and cutting it should count as a workout!

Off to the gym and then home to work on the photo album project. Bill is headed up to the kids to help with child care while my niece is on a business trip. I was kind of surprised I didn't get asked, and then it dawned on me that the trouble I have with their stairs and the fact that they don't like Toby's size (silly people), that they figured that Bill would be a better choice. Actually, I was glad not to have to spend the rest of the week up there. Have a great day!

Well today is not a good morning...up and up and up the scale goes. I actually had a melt down today. Couldnt deal with another gain. I dont understnand what im doing wrong anymore. Am i just on the wrong diet? I did low cal for a long time and it worked great but i tried low carb and i love not having an appetite and not bingeing at all anymore but i just dont get it. 227.8 up to 230.6. It doesnt make sense anymore. I think whats worse..is that these gains are bringing out all this repressed stuff from my teen years and all of the reasons why i gained fat on purpose as a teen and its causing me to struggle with my past disorered eating. I also admitted today that the pastors comment about the frumpy women in ou church, has caused me more hurt than i originally thought. Im struggling to find balance right now. Right now i want to hide away from everyone and every thing to protect myself. I amafraid of being hurt but from what? I dont know. I just feel like im trying to protect myself by hiding away just like in the past how i hid from people through food. I have no words of encouragement today..im just really stuck today..pushng myself to swim even though i dont want to. I would rather just go to bed

Computer acting up making it hard to do longer posts.
Reading and thinking of you all.
I am doing good.
Welcome back Cindy.

Well..pushed myself to the pool today. I didnt want to but i did. When you feel like somthing is not working or your failing..the last thing you want to do is push yourself to exercise when all you can think about is "whats the point". I guess it helped somewhat. I was able to take my pain and my anger out in the pool.

To be honest..i found out that someone i know well..is dying of liver failure. He is an alcoholic and he did this to himself and he owns a very lucrative weight loss company and health business and most of his clientelle have been lied to about the true state of his health. You are as sick as your secrets..he had lots..so did his wife. I dont blame them for not wanting to be honest with their clients cause i know it would probably have tanked their business in the ground...but still. Now he is near death..wont be out of the hospital and his wife is putting on the brave face and all i can think about is how mad i am. I am just as peeved at him for drinking his liver to an un-repairable state causing him to die at the age of 56 as i am angry at myself for my liver issues.

When i was 18 i was diagnosed with somthing called "Mono- Hepatitis". Its rare and i got it and my liver swelled 10x its normal size. I was very ill and on steroids and an all carb, no fat no protein diet to reduce inflammation. Ever since then it gets out of wack and they have to monitor it closely. Well in 2013 when i had my weight loss surgery..the Drs discovered that my liver was beginning to fail and it was way too big to be normal. Thats when the Dr said "you have non-alcoholic fatty liver disease". They told me to either turn my life around, lose weight, eer ise and reduce stress or the liver was going to continue failing. So..i lost 100 pounds..eercised my brains out..stopped taking as many meds as possible and reduced my stress. Well..in 2015 when i had my gallbladder removed..they(drs) said there were issues. My liver was hugging my gallbladder and it was waaaaay too big and there was evidence of fibrosis(scarring) on my liver. When i met with a bariatric specalist for follow up, he said he was concerned about it and i asked him "well how do you fix it?" and he replied "you dont". You just monitor its size and do bloodwork to check enzyme levels. The liver is a fast healing organ. If 5% of it functions..it can regenerate new liver cells. However you can not undo the scarring and damage of years past.

So thats it..im peeved..im mad that this guy killed his liver by drinking his life away just as much as i am angry at myself for eating my liver away. It would never have gotten so bad if i had only found control over my body an eating and had lost weight far sooner..so yah..thats why im angry..

Sorry for venting. For the first time in my life..im actually writing out how i feel instead of eating. Its a breakthrough i think. Feel free to ignore my rambligs if its too much to read..cause like Fi..i dont want to burden anyone.