I am so sick of dieting. My entire life I have been dieting since I was 20. I lose it, and gain it back. I will skip right to my last diet. I lost all the weight and got to 155 (20 lbs above where I wanted to be). I was thrilled but kept trying to get to 135 over like 2 years. Just couldn't do it. Then, I hit that moment, you know it... where your life takes a turn and you need to take that discipline you are using for your diet on something else... and before you have even looked up... you are 30 lbs added. Then you try to diet again and, it is slow going, but more than that... your mindset isn't really in it. Then you wake up one day and ... your back, straining at your biggest clothes.

First, you go through denial. I couldn't possibly have put the weight back on right? Second you go through, well I should just give up and accept myself as I am. Then you can't find clothing anymore. Then your body has a ton of aches and pains. Then you see yourself in a mirror and you see that your body looks like jabba the hutt and then you know it, your going to have to diet again.

But how, your mindset still is in rebellion? You can't fool yourself anymore into all those things you used to do to motivate you to lose weight. You know what you probably will gain it back. You know the chances of a permanent lifestyle change are slim. But still you have to do it. Health, well for me losing weight never improved it. In fact, in some ways it made it worse.

I am losing weight only so I can fit into clothing and fit comfortably into chairs when I am out in the world. That is pretty much it.

And now, due to the amount I gained, there is no way this will be a 6 month thing. It is 12 or 18 month thing...

I have been dieting so long I know a few things
1. I have a slow metabolism. I just don't see the results that others do. I am about 15% less than them.
2. Perhaps it is number one but exercise, unless it is for a long time, doesn't get me much at all.
3. I work and that is not likely to change. This gives me about 3 hours per day of free time.

But, I do have to do it. I can no longer fit into my clothing and I refuse to buy bigger.

Kim! You do have a way with description and it could be describing me! I know exactly what you are talking about. Been there, done that! A few years ago I had decided to give up on dieting for good. After years of yo-yo dieting, I had to take a medicine (unrelated to dieting) that caused me to gain 50 lbs in 6 months! After the shock of that, and trying once again to count calories and exercise, I was fed up. I threw in the towel and for the life of me could not motivate myself to count calories or count anything--carbs, protein grams, fat grams, bites--anything! Then I came across an article on a diet called the Slow Carb Diet and not only did it address glucose and insulin (I'm not diabetic but I have reactive hypoglycemia and a family history of diabetes), but it addressed my cravings, I wouldn't have to count anything, AND I'd get a cheat day each week! It seemed too good to be true, but I tried it anyway (or at least my own modified version of it) and I lost 43 lbs in about 6 months! The dumbest thing I did was go off that diet, because it was a healthy diet that seemed perfectly suited to me. But I wanted to lose weight for my daughter's wedding and when that wedding drew close, I went off the diet and gained all the weight back AND 10 lbs! Now I am back on the diet and in a month, I've lost 15 lbs again with what seems like very little effort. I don't know if you've ever tried a low-carb diet, but if you want to take a look at what the Slow Carb Diet is about, here's a link to the thread I post on: http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/othe...hread-3-a.html. Please understand, I am not against calorie-counting! I think it works very well for some people. It's just not for me. Likewise, the Slow Carb Diet is not for everyone. It's best for people who have cravings for things like breads and pasta and sweets, people who are carb-sensitive. Anyway, whichever method of weight loss you choose (and there are lots of options), I wish you the best!

P.S. I want to add, take a look around here and jump right in! Posting really helps! There's a lot of motivational inspiration here, and it may help to give you just the spark you need! Good luck!

I think you just described a lot of here. I've noticed that when I've strayed from the accountability of this forum I tend to gain my weight back. In the last 18-months I went from my lowest (adult) weight and gained 60 pounds. As you said, something other than weight loss required my attention. I had tried off and on to lose weight over the past year and a half but I found I kept playing a victim of circumstance. Now I'm kicking myself into gear.

I'm really glad you came here. I think you'll find a lot of support. There are groups for specific diets, age ranges, exercises, you name it. My personal favorite is Chicks Up For a Challenge. I find they help me set goals and work towards keeping them. And you can join anytime (there are month long or year long challenges in process) we're always happy for new people!

Thanks all for the welcome. I am not sure what I am going to do, but I feel like just registering is helpful.

Are we twins? LOL. I feel the same way you do.. It happened pretty much the same way you said.. I have lots to lose and joined an Optifast program to try to reprogram the way I think about food.. hoping for the best for both of us!!

I just signed up yesterday for a program that uses optifast (though we aren't sure we are going to use it yet). My last diet was a medically supervised diet so I am a little concerned another one would be a mistake but... I keep hitting this problem... I get down to a certain weight and then cannot lose.

On the medically supervised diet I was on I made the mistake of quitting with 20 more lbs to go... now I see that was a major mistake. At that point I should have redoubled my efforts.

If I do optifast I will not quit until I am at goal (which I think I will make slightly more reasonable than my last goal).

Kim4545

I am really liking the Optifast diet! Only in week 2, but so far, so good. I went to a fitness center today before work and walked on the treadmill for 30 minutes - feels good to have the exercise done for the day already!! Let me know if you decide to do Optifast!

I decide on Tuesday. I have the option of optifast or medifast. So far I am so impressed with this place. Today I went in for medical testing. I was weighed, measured, checked for body fat, bone mass (assuming those scales were correct). I would have gotten labs but I was so dehydrated (they told me to fast) they couldn't get a vein. But I just got labs at my doctor so we are ok otherwise. Then we got the metabolsim testing. I had it done before with a machine that I didn't think was that accurate. This thing was like a full headmask hooked up to a computer. In the end... my RMR 1200. BMR 1500. That explains so much. Last year on the other machine my RMR was 1400 BMR `1700. But I have always felt it was the 1500 number.

I didn't think that was right. And now, I feel like it wasn't. I asked them NOT to tell me my weight, unfortunately, when I was looking an the online portal I saw my weight 212.

The bad news. This is exactly where I was when I stared my last diet.
The good news. I thought it was going to be much more. So I am happy. Plus I have been off the wagon for over a year and it seems I only gained 20 lbs. That says the rate of gain slows as I get larger.

What is also weird is that I literally start every diet at 212. It makes me feel like there is something in my body that makes me wish to stop eating at this point.

In a way though I feel depressed. 1500 per day gives very little wiggle room to lose. Even less once you start getting smaller. Is this why I can't lose after I get to about 165, because my BMR falls? Is it just foolsh to even try again? I don't know. If my BMR is 1500 at 212, what would it be at 140 (assuming I make it there).

Hi Kim. Hang in there! I know how you feel luv! 10 years ago I had got myself on a heck of a roll losing weight, exercising and dieting. God I hate that stupid D word. It's like a cuss word almost. DIET! GRRRR.

Anyway, I was going along, had lost about 60-70 pounds in 6 months and then my father got sick and died....15 months later my mother past and I just threw in the towel with it all. Food was my best friend and it took me 10 years to look back in the mirror again. I was like ARE YOU FREAKIN SERIOUS? I had gained about oh, 85 pounds.

I made a lifestyle change in January of this year and 62 pounds gone later and a knowledge that I will have to life like this for the rest of my life, exercising and eating with the knowledge that I can't just stuff my face with whatever I want, which I have come to grips with. Only took me 10 years. lol

This isn't easy for any of us here but at least we are all in it together. One big huge boat, holding each other up. So climb on in, make yourself comfortable, have a protein shake or two (lol) and we will be there for ya

Thanks... even doing this it seems a big like a losing battle. After getting my BMR measured yesterday I at least got some confirmation that my metabolism is slow. So I have kind of a tightrope. My body wants about 1700 cals per day and I am drawn to that. Anything less takes massive amounts of concentration and guarding and from history, it seems there is only so long I can do that before I "relapse". I even feel like the relapse could be a mental / physical thing. I always start my diets at 212. It is like my body literally craves a diet when I get to 212.

But I suspect that when I diet / lose weight, I get down to about 1350 per day BMR so you can see how easy it is to go over that both by pure accident and utter frustration.

But I will say, the only thing I have never actually done is pick a goal weight that I can make, be happy with that, and quit at that time with a maintenance plan.

Typically I get hung up about 20 lbs above where I want to be and spend about a year or so tilting and windmills trying to get that off and failing until I finally break.