Hi All,

I just joined 3 fat chicks because it sounds so cute. I really need to do something about this weight. I have been overweight most of my life, maybe 30 years of dieting and getting close to "normal" size.

My main problem is I over eat at night, about 5 days out of the week. And, I have an adult son age 44 who refuses to take care of himself even though he works, he's a moocher and living with me. His problems become my problem and now I am depressed. His car is down and he is borrowing mine to get to work, which is really pissing me off.

I adopted his son who is 16 and less a headache as his father. I've already told my son he has to leave, he is waiting for his tax refund. I pray I can last that long. Oh, yeah, anti depressants do not work for me, tried them all.

Any help would be greatly appreciated.

Hi Cyndygail! I'm 52 and have also dieted for almost all of the last 30 years and what is finally working for me is following a low-carb diet with a built-in cheat day each week. It's based on the Slow Carb diet. You can read a little about what I wrote about it here: http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/othe...carb-diet.html. I've now lost 22.5 lbs in 2 months and 8 days, which I think is incredible, especially since once a week, I can eat anything I want! But then, this diet may work so well for me because I'm carb-sensitive and not all people are. But with as much stress as you are facing, which means you are probably producing a lot of cortisol which causes belly fat, and limiting carbs helps with reducing belly fat, a low-carb diet might work for you. As for the rest, I do hope you are seeing a therapist. It's helps me tremendously to have someone to talk to, even better than meds. I know it must be terribly hard to have to ask your own son to leave your house, but as you pointed out, he's grown. His problems should no longer be your problems. I do hope you can get it all worked out for your peace of mind and health.

I agree with Jacqui!

Also, anti-depressants do not work with any bipolar patients - they can actually cause manic episodes. My husband can attest to that... have you ever tried talking to your doc about a mood stabilizer? It's not an SSRI - they worked wonders for my husband.

Also have you considered that your son may have inherited your bipolar disorder? Bipolar runs in my family. My brother and my son have it at a very high functioning level. My son sounds like your son, he can work but has great difficulty organizing his life and needs help in things that seem basic to most people.

Excellent points... And, as asked before, are you seeing a therapist? They can help with stabilizing your moods and it takes time. Also, you mention antidepressants, but since you're bipolar what else have you been on? If it's been a while since you've talked to someone about your diagnosis, I suggest you be seen by a specialist... they've come a long why with bipolar and it would help to get in with someone.

I so wish you the best of luck. I'm a stress eater and do most of that at night (did! trying to be "in recovery"). I've used food as comfort and to help stabilize my moods (anxiety) but then I find myself in a vicious circle b/c of weight issues. I really hope you find peace soon.

A good medication to ask your doctor about is Lamictal - It's relatively new, and has worked great for my husband. We haven't seen any side-effects and he's been on it since December.

Hi All,
Thank you all for taking time out to answer. My son is bipolar with rage attacks and I know he inherited it from me. It is much easier to count the people in my entire family who are not bi polar. I can trace it back to my beloved maternal grandfather, who had severe mood swings and was quite cruel or extremely loving to my mom and her siblings. I was his first grandchild and he spoiled me rotten and never saw a cruel side to him. Most of my family are high achievers, doctors, professors, ect. and bi polar. I have a 138 IQ but never had the desire to even go to college, although most take for granted I have a degree or 2. I tried mood stabilizers back in the day, the usual had side effects. Like you said, antidepressants never worked and I stayed depressed. I have been off anti depressants for 2 years now, stopped cold turkey never felt any difference. I also lost my short term memory 20years ago, docs could not figure out why and have been disabled on SS since then. I really am not keen on new meds, I have found out the brain never forgets the neurological medications you take. I have enough problems with out a possible war of meds in my brain. It is really hard to lose weight when the only comfort you receive is from over eating. I can feel myself slipping into depression. If I start eating I can get over it! Ironic. Having a relationship with Jesus is the best med I have. Be Blessed, all. <><