Guys,

I haven't posted on this forum much, but I have used it along with myfitnesspal when I was trying to lose weight. I am just so sick of this, being fat. It isn't even about how I look any more, it's about how I am feeling.

I have always been fat. I was a fat kid, a fat teenager, and a fat adult. My highest weight ever was 347 lbs at the age of 19. I remember because I was completely appalled when it showed up on the scale. I was ashamed, embarrassed, and really just shocked that I was that freaking fat. I didn't ever try to diet after that, but my weight did go down a little bit. In January of this year, I was 325 at the doctor. Still ridiculously fat but less than before. I figured "well, if I've lost weight I must be doing something right!" so I continued to not change anything and keep eating the way I had been, getting no exercise, etc.

This has been building up for a while now. I have been watching a cousin on her weight loss journey go from 450 lbs to 240 within the last year and wondering if I could do that too. I ordered some clothes for a wedding and some lingerie.. when I got my clothes, I was completely embarrassed by how huge the panties and lingerie was. It was disgusting. This past week I ate an entire pound - YES, A POUND - of crackers in ONE DAY. This morning was really the final straw. My fiance brought home some breakfast. He is a big guy, but he is over a foot and a half taller than I am. He brought me two cheesy fat filled biscuits from a fast food place, a large fries, and a large soda. I ate ALL of it and watched him eat the same amount. I ate as much as someone over a foot BIGGER than me. Not only did I feel disgusted with myself then, but later I decided to do some cardio to feel better. I could barely do 5 minutes of exercise without feeling completely worn out, my head throbbing, out of breath.. it is just horrible.

I am just really ashamed that I have got like this. I am only 23 years old, and I am destroying my body.. and no matter how many 'fat pride' videos or blogs I watch or read, the fact is that I am out of shape, embarrassed, and sick of it. I don't want to spend the rest of my life feeling this horrible. I have no idea where to start or what to do, but I am starting today.

*hug* I am glad you are starting. You might want to try an app like MyFitnessPal to help you count calories. It is what I use and I find it super easy to use. Keep coming to this site for support. You can do it! There are really wonderful people here.

Welcome. Focus on your diet and forget the exercise for now.

Control what you eat and the pounds will drop. They did for me!

Good for you!

It sounds as if you've reached that point where you know it's time to do something. And you really do have to get there on your own; no one can make that decision for you.

This is a great place for support; you have lots of people cheering you on!

I agree with IanG - baby steps. Concentrate on one thing at a time. If you try to change too much at once you'll get discouraged.

Be sure to read the success stories here - they are inspiring! They did it, and you can too! You are smart to do this when you're young, rather than wait until the older body is ravaged from years of excess weight. I have a niece who's been morbidly obese all of her adult life. She's now 46 and has already been hospitalized for heart problems. So it's no longer cosmetic for her.

First of all, be kind to yourself. You wouldn't be disgusted by a friend struggling with weight problems, and I'm sure you weren't disgusted by your cousin when she was at her highest. Be your own best cheerleader! Remind yourself that your health is worth taking care of. Assess your priorities, make lists, take small steps in the right direction, and track your progress. Take photos now, even if you're not ready to look at them yet . . . you'll be thankful to have them to compare to later.

Just so you know, I totally get where you're coming from; I've been obese (or worse) all of my adult life, all of my teen years, and throughout much of my childhood. I weighed over 250 pounds when I was only 14 years old, and I got all the way up to 360 pounds when I was in my 20's. I was too big for Lane Bryant jeans. I lived through Wisconsin winters without a coat that was big enough to zip up. Exercise seemed out of the question since even just walking across from one end of the room to the other put me in the hospital.

You're making a great start by deciding to do something. A lot don't even get that far! When I decided I'd had enough and needed to make some changes, the very first thing I did was make myself eat a lot of vegetables. That led me to seek out more healthy habits that I could adopt, one change at a time. I still have a long ways to go, but I've lost nearly 150 pounds, am beginning to get out of the plus sizes I was once too big for, and am [slowly] learning to love jogging.

You can totally do this! And you can get a lot of support here. Come back often for encouragement, inspiration, questions, and ideas. Also, find ways to reward your actions along the way instead of being so hard on yourself! Too many see weightloss as an all-or-nothing thing, but the reality is that it takes a lot of time and effort. It's so worth toughing it out though.

Take care and check back in with us often.

and welcome!

This site if full of all kinds of great info!

A few tips from my perspective.

Relax, it's gonna take awhile.
It's a lifestyle change not a diet.
Pick one food thing for the next week and commit to sticking to it. Rinse and repeat!
Pick one exercise thing for the next week and commit to sticking to it. Rinse and repeat!
Make a long range goal plan, but don't worry too much about it, focus more on small/short term goals. Like lose 5 pounds, and do it again. Walk around the block without thinking you're going to die, do it again, in a few weeks add another block!
Small successes do add up over time.
Be kind to yourself.
Slips will happen, holidays will happen, life happens! Don't flog yourself with wet noodles. Accept it, learn from it and move on!
None of us are perfect!

Ok, so much for the mental eval! Lol!

Food! Lean meats. Skinless chicken, lean pork, lean beef, fish. Those new tuna packets, are a lifesaver in a pinch!

Lots of fresh veggies and fruit. Try new things!

If you do not cook, learn!

Quit eating processed junk. Convenience foods are not convenient, or that cheap for that matter. What is more convenient than baby carrots, bananas, grapes, celery, apples, etc. Finger food with no preservatives and additives, and much less packaging, also good for the environment. Buy local if you can, (farmers markets) also good for the environment. No shipping from God knows where, and supports your community.

Grow your own! Even if you live in an apartment, you can container garden and grow a few things. Cukes are easy. There are several varieties of tomatoes specifically for containers. If nothing else, with the help of a grow light you can grow your own herbs! Yummy! And good for the air in your home!

Eating out is ok now and then, but tough to judge. I only eat out about once a month, but plan for it so I can have whatever I want with no worries.

It will be a challenge. Life is full of them. I took on a first for me today. I signed up to do a 5k through my local fitness/community center. Mind you, I do workout, but I strength train, I don't do 5k's! Sucked it up, showed up, with no clue how this worked.

Turns out it was a lot of fun. I walked most of the course, I didn't come in last and had a good time! I'm gonna start adding training for 5k's into my workout plan. I'll keep up the strength training because I like it and it helps with my profession, but I want to do more 5k's and do better.

Hang in there, if I can do it anyone can!

I just want to hug you & wish you well in your journey. You will absolutely do it.

Something I wish I would have done in the beginning is take pics. Starting pics and then once a month to use for comparison. It's tough to see the progress when you see yourself everyday!

Welcome and good luck on your journey!!

Welcome!

I have found this site to be incredibly helpful and supportive, so you are in the right place. You have taken the first step, to realize that there's a problem. Now the hardest part is to keep on taking steps. Maybe it's just baby steps, maybe it's just cutting out fast food, but it all counts in the long run. Learn to live and learn to love yourself. Good luck!

Welcome to the journey! Feel free to add me on My Fitness Pal! I am RavenWolf1977 there!

Don't listen to all that fat pride crap! I even had a friend (who is also a big girl) tell me that there is nothing wrong with being fat as long as you can still function. Really? Because everyone I personally know who is overweight, are not in shape, can't do what they want, etc. I think those remarks are a cop out for people who do not have the desire to lose weight and therefore do not want others to lose weight either.

When I started 1 January, I was out of breath JUST as quick as you. I was miserable, it hurt to walk but every day I walked a little further and it didn't take long to notice the increase in stamina and such.

While I agree that you should focus more on your eating habits (I will not say diet, as that implies short term and this is a life long journey), you should definitely be walking daily and slowly increasing your distance. (Speed will come on it's own, don't push to hard.) You sound like you are as out of shape as I was, and it is really important for your health to increase your fitness level!

Make sure you weigh and measure everything you take in. Your meals may be "boring" in the beginning while you feel things out, but the longer you do it, the easier the food choices get.

Nix the soda. Really. I was a Mountain Dew addict FOR YEARS! I quit cold turkey and it sucked...but now I can walk by the soda cooler and not even be tempted by it! Drink water instead, even if you have to flavor it to begin with.

You absolutely CAN do this! You deserve to be healthy and comfortable!

So welcome to the journey! Coming here is the first step toward your success!

You can do this! I started 2 weeks ago today! Let me tell you this site is the best place to be! There are times when I would have given up and I posted and got wonderful support and encouragement from the people here! I am doing WW online and I track everything on MyFitnessPal. Find what works for you. You can also start a blog on here. I have found that helpful to work through the emotional part of losing weight.

You can do this! A few years ago, I thought I was "living" my life. I had a 40-50 year old diabetic out walk me when I was walking up a steep incline. I cried in front of all my kids (I was a counselor). I told them I was feeling sick. I was. I was sick of being fat. After a bad breakup a few months later, I started losing weight for real. I had already lost 25 pounds just by cutting back on one meal. Even though I gained half the weight back, I still felt so much better than I did at 300. You can do this! When I was actively losing, I remember hearing co-workers comment on my success and how much happier I seemed.

I agree. For the most part at least. I still feel like everyone should invest in a pedometer and slowly increase steps from there.

Congratulations on getting started!

Personally I would get on the healthy eating plan and also go ahead and do what exercise you can... if it is only one or two minutes, that is fine. Just do what you can and let it build from there without feeling bad that you can't do more. Start small!

Wishing you all the best.

Welcome!

Your comment about watching "fat pride" videos struck me. There is so much more to take pride in than what you look like. You can take pride in making healthy choices for your body, pride in walking 500 more feet or for 2 more minutes than you did the day before. Pride at using coping skills other than eating for stressful times. Pride at accepting where you are today and committing to making a change every day going forward.

Shut off those videos, close the blogs and focus on yourself and what you want for your life!