Ever since I was a chubby little girl I always thought to myself "someday I won't be fat, then I'll be beautiful and wear nice clothes and find true love". I had a stint of thinness in high school but otherwise I've never been happy with my body.

Lately I've found myself doing the same thing "I'll wear this next summer once I'm thin." "I'll do this activity next year when I'm thinner" etc. I'm wondering if anyone else does this? Is it motivation or counter productive (kind of like procrastination)

been doing it since I started this journey again 4 weeks again. I love daydreaming about it and WILL meet my goal this time~ Can't Wait!

i view it two ways:

1) i refuse to deny myself something because of my weight...if i want a pretty dress, or to do some activity, i refuse to put myself down or berate myself for my weight...and i will live my life now at the weight i am at

and 2) i do use some things for motivation....i find that i use food as a reward but i'm using it in a healthier manner right now...every time i reach a weight loss goal, i buy a protein smoothie from my gym (very tasty, very spendy)

I do think that it can become an excuse/procrastination, and I think it can be a dangerous road to go down. I think it ends up putting a lot of pressure on that future thin person!

What if you get to your goal weight and don't look the way you thought, don't fit in clothes the way you thought, don't find the man you thought you would, don't feel the way you thought you would? Will you then have huge regrets that you didn't just go on with your life back when you weren't thin?

Do NOT put anything off! Because there is a chance that you won't ever feel or look the way you think you will. Just live the life you want, NOW, thin or not!

This, exactly!! You never know what's coming down the road. Live NOW! The only thing holding you back from doing what you want to do, is you!

Well, I keep doing this; but I'm not happy with it. I have this khaki skirt that I've never worn, still has the tag on it. It fits pretty good now...but every time I put it on I say to myself "I'll wear this when I lose 5 or 10 more pounds." As if, by magic those 5lbs would make me more comfortable in this short skirt. NOPE. My legs look good and I want to accent the positive. It is just that whole muffin top thing holding me up. I'm sure that will be the last place I finally start to lose and look good because it was where I started gaining weight first so many years ago.

I think this is stinkin thinkin...at least on my part. I know what I need to do...suck it up and wear the skirt before summer is over and it is too late. I think maybe (just maybe) you also know what you need to do...live TODAY because yesterday is gone and tomorrow isn't here yet.

I realized in my late 20's, early 30's that I had to stop making living contingent upon weight loss.

For many years, I denied myself just about everything in the name of weight loss. The problem was that denying myself everything worthwhile, made eating my only pleasure, and when I took that away to lose weight, I had absolutely nothing and I'd make myself so miserable that I'd eventually give up and decide it wasn't worth it.

If I had put off my life until I lost all the weight, I'd probably have died an old, fat woman with no life.

Ironically, being determined to try to do everything I wanted to do NOW, actually made the weight loss easier. Dating, meeting and marrying hubby, swimming because I love it (even if fat girls aren't supposed to let anyone see them in a bathing suit), and being determined not to assume that my fat prevented me from doing anything until I had tried it, actually made weight loss a lot easier to stick with, because I'm not missing out on anything during the weight loss phase.

Because I'm not putting my life on hold, there's never the temptation to give up - because I'm not depriving myself of anything. I'm just living to the best of my abilities, and while I'm at it, trying to lose some weight. And by doing all the things I want to as I'm able to do them, is much more incentive than denying myself those things, and promising myself I can have it all AFTER the weight loss.

I am doing exactly the same thing. I refuse to go shopping for clothes at the size I am now. This however means that I only have one good pair of jeans and a few tops which I wear over and over again. It's to painfull to go do shopping when all I see is what I could have bought if I'd I was thinner. I just can't accept that I can look good while I'm bigger. And this have been going on a long time now and results in the fact that I don't look after myself,because "I will dress well again when I am thinner". I don't think it motivates me,it just makes me miserable.

I'm a nerd. A huge one. I like to cosplay. I have a list of costumes to do "if I ever find myself skinny." I try not to let my weight keep me from doing things that I want to that aren't fashion-related, but I definitely have a few dream costumes on hold for the day when I lose enough weight to get over some of my body issues.

...totally not going to start work on an Inara Serra outfit the SECOND I hit goal

I do this all the time! All the frickin' time! I see it as a motivator though. Having my weight on my stomach and hip area, it restricts the clothes I can wear. I wouldn't want to wear something that makes me look bigger. But when I'm going shopping and I see a lovely little petite dress and think "One day I will look good in that!" Or if it is fitted around the stomach, I think the same thing.

This is the worst attitude to have. Stop putting your life on hold for something that might never happen. Live as if you are at your goal weight now.

Buy nice clothes so that when you get to your goal size you will have a wicked sense of style. I know we all want to be slimmer and stuff but you need to stop living for maybe and start living for today!

WEAR YOUR SKIRT! Then post pictures of your gorgeous legs!

I find this a hugely interesting and personally relevant topic. For a long time, I always imagined the "future" me as thinner, taller (how?! lol), and generally having my life together much more. Posh clothes, etc. I did it as a child thinking of my 16 year old self, as a teenager imagining my college self, my college self imagining my "real world" self. But at some point this stopped. Despite being fat. I've sometimes looked down at my clothes and thought, "Who is this stylish person?" "This is a cozy apartment, whose is it?" (Mine!) "Whose great life is that?" (Mine, again!) I think part of the reason for this has been allowing myself to mature emotionally. Not stunting myself by focusing on my not-haves but developing my sense of self (naturally, through travel, introspection, therapy, sincere friendships). I live an interesting life and that helps me feels satisfied and even propels me to experience new things. A great self-fulfilling prophecy. Not that getting healthy and weight loss isn't important (IT SO IS), but I really don't find that it prevents me from doing/realizing much at this point in my life.

I will cop to, though, putting off some clothes shopping at the moment. It just seems like a waste to buy new clothes that won't fit in a few months. Really getting new stuff is going to wait until goal.