At 9am, and I am awake since 5am dreading it (actually ever since I received the appointment letter).

It is not just that I hate my boobies being squashed to the point of horrible pain .. in fact that is the least of it. It is not even that my German is almost non extent and the non-English speaking practitioner has to move me around like a robot. Nor is it even about the fact that I am agoraphobic and the whole thing is a nightmare of avoiding panic attacks ... in fact the breathing exercises to cope help distract.

It is the waiting room. Full of woman from my postal code area assigned this day to be squashed.

I know this is a good thing to do, in fact essential, I just dread it so much.

It is a very important thing to do. I am proud of you for facing up to all the things you dread and going to have it done.

x2

Thank you =)

The ordeal is over and I am back at home.

Interestingly, the number of woman in my post code is dwindling. I arrived to find my neighbour in situ. she is a lovely woman, outgoing and friendly. She is one of the judges on the Olympic selection committee in Germany and has a beautiful home, with amazing gardens, all of which she tends herself. Over the past five years, during which I have attended this clinic, she is the one person I have always relied on to greet and chat with so it was reassuring to see her there.

However, usually there are four more women who attend from around here and they were not there, apparently because they are all past 70 years old now and this, too, was her last attendance as she will turn 70 soon. After that they do not do mammograms. I guess next year I will be alone!

All went as anticipated apart from the fact that, this time, the reception and the practitioner both spoke English and it was a whole lot more gentle.

That is until afterwards while I was dressing. I had forgotten to lock the door that leads into the changing room from the waiting room so the lock showed green and the next patient was called. Of course the nurse opened the door for her and the assembled group in the waiting room got a full google at my naked boobies. When I eventually emerged it was too a room of grinning, but sympathetic people.

I am glad this is over for another two years!

I am proud of you! I was nervous going to my mammogram too but I found the ladies in the waiting room with me to almost be like a sisterhood. We talked and laughed about all sorts of things including mammograms and shared winks when we sensed another woman was worried. It was nice to not feel alone b/c you have a room full of sisters out there who are literally, there with you in your shoes. I am glad you found a support and I am sure she was glad she found a friendly face for support as well.